This article was originally published on October 7, 2015 and has been updated.
How do you stay positive and passionate? Do you struggle to stay positive, especially when you’re going through a difficult challenge? Is your lack of positive thinking stalling your progress?
I am often asked how I stay so positive and passionate. The answer is pretty simple.
Positive thinking isn’t hard. In fact, it’s easy to stay positive when you’re doing what you love. Think about it: it’s so much easier to stay positive in life when what you’re doing is supporting your growth, development, goals, and values.
When you’re doing what you love, you experience fewer curve balls. roadblocks, or situations that make you angry or sad.
Most importantly, when you’re doing what you love, you experience fewer challenges that make you question yourself.
My inner truth.
Here’s my inner truth—my life is not perfect all the time. But I choose to be positive and passionate in spite of it.
Sometimes it’s hard to know how to be more positive and passionate.
You can learn how to find your inner truth and focus on positivity when you understand how to get through bad moments—and what causes those bad moments.
So let’s draw back the curtain, shall we?
3 Times I don’t feel so positive and passionate (and what I do to overcome these feelings!)
1. When I’m around negative people.
Let’s be honest: negative people suck. Literally. They suck the life, energy, and happiness out of you. When I’m around negative people, I can feel them draining my positive attitude. I can feel my inner truth start to crumble.
It’s near impossible to be positive around people who suck the life out of you. Let’s refer to these people as emotional vampires—because in all reality, that’s exactly what they are.
A big part of my job is to coach people through difficult situations in their lives, situations they chose or were on the receiving end of.
The main difference between these people and emotional vampires, is that they are seeking to make a change and to use setbacks to learn and grow, rather than wallow.
I should be clear about something.
Expressing or acknowledging that you are struggling, or having the desire to clear feelings left after a bad experience, are very different from being a sucky person.
Being able to admit they’re stuck is what sets sucky people apart from the positive and passionate people.
Negative people bring us down. Remember that. If you have negative people in your life who are constantly sucking away your positive thinking, it may be time to rethink those relationships.
Don’t write them off completely, but be honest with them. Help them move forward. Use your own positive energy to bring positivity into their lives.
If nothing changes, it may be time to cut ties before they suck your own life out of you.
2. My values are being dishonored.
This can happen for a number of reasons. You could be doing it to yourself, or someone could be doing it to you.
An example of dishonoring your values is when you procrastinate on a big project, or do something that may prevent you from achieving your goals—like if you’re trying to lose weight but you skip the gym and order a pizza.
When someone is dishonoring your values, it’s a setback.
How do you know when someone is dishonoring your values?
If you’re not feeling good about something someone said or did to you, ask yourself why you’re upset. You may have just had your values dishonored.
Here’s my own personal experience of when I had my own values dishonored:
I run a women’s community called Dynamic Women in Action. When people say they will come and do not show up, I feel my value being dishonored. Negativity starts brewing up inside of me.
Because commitment, trust and my word are some of my most important values. When those values are dishonored, I have negative thoughts. When this happens, I have to take a step back and self-manage by focusing on where I am honoring my own values.
3. I’m stuck.
Feeling stuck when experiencing obstacles is a surefire way to lose momentum. This is is quickly followed by negativity.
it's hard to stay positive when you're working so hard but aren't seeing any results or progress. Sometimes you have to refocus. Try doing something different. If what you’re doing isn’t working, change it up. Acknowledge that what you’re doing isn't working and take the next step—even if it’s a baby step.
Sometimes when I get stuck, I can feel myself losing momentum. It feels like blocks are being placed in front of me.
Here’s what to do if this happens to you:
Follow these steps and you’ll feel refreshed. And once you get moving again, your motivation will return.
Just remember to never fake positivity. There’s a difference between putting your best self forward and faking it.
Never underestimate how much others can help you. Having people listen to your feelings, thoughts and struggles can help a lot. Make sure you have an outlet so you can be your best self.
The 3 ways to be more positive and passionate are:
1. Surround yourself with positive people.
2. Honour your values!
3. Keep moving forward, and don’t be afraid to ask for help.
These are three of the top ways I stay positive and passionate, but I have a lot more! Learn more in my book, Live Your Passion.
And, If you’re a woman and want to learn how to unleash the potential that exists inside of you, consider signing up for my Dynamic You Program to help give you the clarity you’re working on.
But everyone is different, so I'd love to hear from you!
How do you stay passionate and positive? Dancing to music? Walking your dog?
Let me know!
Liked this post? Here are three more you might also like to read!
Work when you can: 6 tactics to get more done in less time
4 crucial questions about your life path
Finding the Right Accountability Partner
This post was originally published April 2016 and was updated in 2019 and republished.
Mompreneurs have a unique vantage point that few others have.
It’s the opportunity to witness the power of small steps.
The growth of my business has kept pace with my daughter’s. I was still in the early stages of my business when she was born, and at that time I wasn’t completely confident in everything I was trying to achieve.
However, our babies master skills little by little and hit developmental milestones. If we follow that example in our business life--taking small steps that scare us—we nurture our confidence and growth from a place of ease and joy instead of fear.
I know you are thinking, can I really reduce my fear by taking small, scary steps? While it may sound counterintuitive, that is exactly what I am saying!
I often encounter clients who set big, challenging career goals, and while they are full of excitement at the beginning, they stop dead in their tracks the moment fear rears its ugly head.
Why are we paralyzed by fear?
There are a few reasons for this, but it’s largely to do with perspective. How we perceive long-term goals makes an impact on achieving them.
At some point it was decided that for something to be considered a long-term goal, it must be huge. Some goals are even referred to as BHAGs: “Big, Hairy, Audacious Goals”. This term describes a long-term goal so large that it changes the very nature of a business' existence. At the same time, we adopted the belief that the outcome of the goal is the only measure of success of failure.
Why have we set such constraints on career goals?
Change your perspective.
I have continued to take small, scary steps throughout my career, committing to reasonably pushing my boundaries a little further each month. Too often only big career goals are set, and the motivation to achieve them wanes too easily.
If we can change our perspective around what is considered a goal, we are much more likely to set, and even enjoy trying to reach them.
Here’s an example. If you set yourself a long-term goal of tripling your sales in a year, it might seem unachievable. After breaking it down into much smaller goals—such as the short-term goal to attend three new networking events this month—it doesn’t seem quite as foreboding. As you complete each of the smaller goals, your motivation stays high and you inch closer and closer toward that larger long-term goal.
It makes sense that when goals are out of proportion to where you are now, you may commit to a huge goal but not be able to follow through.
Think back to watching your child go from rolling over to sitting up. There were lots of small developments in between. Learning to sit helped develop the core muscles needed to walk, just as building your skills and resources to hit your big goal takes time and development.
Push yourself out of your comfort zone a little further every month.
By consistently doing things that you are afraid of, you build confidence at a pace that allows you to catch up to your striving. When I first started doing free discovery calls, I was a little terrified of pitching my coaching services. With practice it got easier and easier, until the fear vanished.
Shifting your perspective on goal setting, and using small powerful steps, will make your professional and personal growth feel easier. I have certainly noticed it changes the nature of how I do things and how much joy and confidence I feel when I do.
Approaching ourselves with the same nurturing touch we give our kids makes room for celebrating our growth too.
Liked this post? Here are three more you might also like to read!
This post was originally posted on August 15th, 2017 and has been updated.
A few years ago I immersed myself in lead generation strategies in a live training session with Paul Toby of Training Business Pros.
Ever since I’ve been sharing his tips with coaching clients. Now you can have it as well (watch my video if you want to skip ahead.)
Here they are...3 lead generation tips to boost reach and sales:
1. Your website
Google likes it when people stay on your site longer.
Time on site equals engaging content—valuable content., In fact, Google wants to see people staying on a page for at least 2 minutes - this plays into your page’s ranking on Google. Remember, Google ranks pages, not sites, so keep people on your homepage longer by inserting anchor links that take people further down the page, not to a different page.
2. Your blog
If you don’t blog already - start. Start now!
Blogging is important for bringing people to your website, keeping them on your site and generating new leads. Google likes new content, and the easiest way to continually put out new content is to blog at least once a week. New content leads to higher page ranking, and therefore more website traffic and leads. However, you need to write content people are searching for. Sure, your existing customers might regularly read your posts, but that won’t get you new leads.
Make sure your blog posts include the keywords and key phrases that people would use to find your site online.
Tip: Post on Google My Business. Your business should have a Google My Business listing (and if not, you can claim yours here). Once verified, you can post articles. If you think about it, Google controls how your pages rank in a search, and Google has the option for you to post articles via Google My Business, so it clearly makes sense for you to add your blog posts on Google My Business.
You can probably tell from the video above I like to vlog (video-blog) too, and that’s OK. Some people don’t like to write, orsimply don’t have time, so my tip is, don’t!
Instead, talk, and use a service like Rev.com which will transcribe anything you say at $1 a minute and they will do it within 24 hours. If you do use a service, note that it won’t be 100% perfect, so do a quick edit before publishing.
Alternatively, write a quick outline of what you want to say, making note of key points, arguments or opinions, and what you want the reader to walk away with and then get a ghost-writer. Of course you must read over other people’s writing to ensure it is written in the same way as you would write, and that the concepts they are writing about are accurate.
If writing is not your core competency, don’t do it. Small business owners and entrepreneurs can’t do everything, so stick with what you know best, and let someone else do what they do best - writing.
3. Have people sharing your work
I am a great believer of tools that save you time so I love this suggestion of using a simple WordPress plug-in called Shareaholic which makes sharing your content to social much easier.
If people can share your content easily to their own social networks, they are much more likely to do so, and a share is a mini-endorsement. If people see others in their online network sharing interesting topics, they are more likely to visit the page, and become a new lead.
So, there you have it - my tips, learned from Paul Toby, to increase your business reach and online leads! If you enjoyed this article, please share it with your network, and check out these additional articles that you might also find interesting:
This post was originally published June 2015 and was updated in 2019 and republished.
Do you have a hard time focusing at work? You’re not alone.
Women constantly tell me how they have a hard time focusing at work, and I can see why! We have so many pressures, wear so many hats and want to do a good job.
However, with our brains full of "to do" lists—not just ours, but our spouse’s, kids’ and maybe even friends—it’s not surprising that even with a task as simple as reading, our minds wander.
According to Canadian researcher Jonathan Schooler, we get distracted from a task at hand anywhere from 15 to 20 percent of the time (source: The Associated Press).
On top of that, we pride ourselves on our multitasking skills. Not good—it turns out that multitasking actually kills our ability to focus and get things done. True focus can only be achieved by concentrating on one task at a time.
What I want to share with you is one of the most valuable time management skills you can learn. It will help you get more done in a shorter amount of time, without getting distracted!
Then let's get to it!
My time-saving tip is the Pomodoro Technique. Pomodoro is the Italian word for tomato and refers to the timer that is shaped like a tomato. Why? Because this technique involves using a timer to break down your workload into 25-minute intervals, separated by 5-10 minutes breaks.
Choose a task that can feasibly be achieved in 25 minutes. For example:
Of course, you don’t have to use a Pomodoro timer, you can use a stopwatch or your phone, anything with an alarm to signal the end of the time.
The premise of the Pomodoro method is that you commit to completing the task within the 25-minute timeframe. When you first start practicing this time management skill, your mind will start to wander. Every time this happens, place a checkmark on a piece of paper, and go back to the task at hand. Do not satisfy your wandering mind! Each and every time you lose focus, put a check mark. As you practice this technique more and more, eventually you will have no checkmarks!
After 25-minutes, the task will be complete, so take a mandatory 5 minute break.
Do this three times in a row for a total of 90-minutes, after which you take a 10-minute break.
Get up, walk around, get a drink, use the washroom - whatever you do, leave your desk, stretch your legs, and satisfy your wandering mind.
I promise that with this laser focus, you will be surprised how much more you can get done in 25-minutes.
The Pomodoro method has some key advantages:
If you divide your entire 8-hour day using the Pomodoro technique, you will complete 14 tasks in a day (assuming you want to take a lunch break). Imagine how much you could get done!!
I truly believe that this is one of the most valuable time management skills as it will focus your time and enable you to get more done in less time, and isn’t that what all busy women want?
Try the Pomodoro technique today and finish the week with your tasks checked off!
P.S. Need some clarity even knowing what to focus on or a structure for your week? This is often what I do with my clients. Connect with me or email me so we can focus on you! email@example.com
If you enjoyed this blog, here are 3 more of my most popular posts:
I write this as I miraculously got both kids to nap at the same time (Mom's get this and will cheer!). I now have time to write this blog… the clarity of what to say is pressured by a child who could awaken at any moment.
So what do I do with time to spare?
Haha! Time to spare? I have a huge list of to do’s and project after project along with two businesses to run. Plus I am running out the door as soon as my husband comes in to lead Dynamic Women™ in Action!
So it brings me to my topic: How do busy parents, or even people, get things done? How are they super productive? How do they run one or two businesses and still make family time?
The answer is simple. We work when we can.
We work when we can’t sleep at midnight. We work in the car waiting for kids to come out of school. We work when we should be watching soccer practice. We work when our kids nap. We work whenever there is a pocket of time that can be used productively. We try NOT to work on family time, but sometimes it’s inevitable.
I’m sure you have figured a lot of this out already, but my goal is not to earn authorship awards for AMAZING new ideas, but to make them more accessible, digestible and unforgettable. Working when you can is one of the most effective time-management skills you can have. It’s using every last second of time you have available in the day for getting things done, and not wasting a moment.
Let me break this down:
So which of the six tactics for effective time-management did I use today? The car as we went to Costco, the pockets while the kids finished their lunch, the double tasking with the laundry and waiting for my child to go to sleep, and double duty because this blog becomes my social media posts.
Let me know which of these time-management skills you will put into play and which ones you already do. Have another one? Tell me by commenting below and I'll add it to my list!
I hope you can find more opportunities to work when you can, so you can have time for all of your priorities, and, family time.
If you have any questions, please feel free to reach out to me, I love connecting with my readers!
Vision boards are a fabulous way of bringing to life internal desires, attract your dreams, and create focus and clarity for what you want in your future. Creating a vision board essentially creates a “sacred space” that displays what you want, and brings it to life.
If you create your board properly, and place it somewhere you can see it every day, it almost forces you to do short visualization exercises throughout the day. Visualization exercises are one of the best mind exercises you can do—you’re forming your desired life experiences through your thoughts, and that is incredibly powerful. Your vision board is going to help you visualize your future and consistently reminds you of your life goals, so that you then invest the time and energy to make it happen. Your vision board will force you to examine your desires and focus on those that truly matter to you.
Visualization is nearly as powerful as performing the action. Not convinced? If it works for Olympians, it can work for you!
However, not all vision boards are created equal, some will actually throw us off balance or bring us what we don’t want. The sad thing is it’s our own doing.
What you put on your board and how you choose the images determines whether you are successful or not.
In this video, you’ll learn from me:
1. How to Create a Vision Board that Magnetizes Your Desires, NOT Repels Them
In the video above, you’ll learn from me the best tips and tricks to not only create a powerful vision board, but how to use it and review it so you can achieve more goals, and reach the success you are aiming for.
I describe the Co-Active Life and share how you need to ‘consciously feel’ the right vision, then ‘unconsciously choose’ the right images—focusing on how you want to feel with your vision board, not just on things that you want. This process will ensure you magnetize the right desires and not sabotage them.
By the end of the video you’ll be able to:
• Have clarity on your most 8-10 most important desire areas
• Create balance in your life by doing this one key step on your board
• Design a vision that is more powerful than just having S.M.A.R.T. goals
• Ensure you don’t jinx your intended results by making these two mistakes
• Replicate a process to clearly and confidently produce a vision board that converts
2. Freedom, Money and Love: Use your Vision Board to Magnetize what you want
One of the worst things you can do is make your vision board just another forgotten project or a piece of art that blends in, rather than the catalyst of your year. It’s a powerful tool when used properly to bring you what you want and keep you focused and motivated.
Using your vision board, you'll be able to:
1. Increase your focus, motivation and drive to achieve your goals, ensuring you’re on the right life path.
2. Design the most powerful habits for you to attract what you want.
3. Identify how you’ll become a stronger player in your own vision.
Then head-on over to www.dianerolston.com/UnleashDynamicYou to be an even bigger player in your vision!
My mom has always believed in me, and usually more than I even believe in myself. It’s this trust that she has in my abilities and skills as a woman in business that helps me to reach for things that seem beyond me. While she never pushes me to go for more, she supports whatever I do. I’m blessed to have gone through life having her as my BIGGEST cheerleader.
She also gives me permission to choose my own path in life, as she did.
Around 50 years ago while in England, my parents were dating. He left to work in Canada and she stayed. Eventually after the mail strike ended, my mother got a letter from him. While on her train ride to the ballet school she taught at she read my Father’s proposal.
My dad was working in Ontario and wanted her to be his wife and for her to move to Canada. She didn’t know much about Canada, only being able to look at things in print, or hear what my father had to share. However, she decided she wanted to check it out for herself before she said yes.
Obviously, she eventually said yes, but it wasn’t as easy as it would have been today. With no Internet, Skype, FaceTime, Email or Facebook, and the phone being too expensive she could only communicate with family by snail mail, there really wasn’t a lot of information available, and she couldn’t communicate with him often.
I often think about how hard that must have been, but if she was able to do that back then, I know I can be here, on the other side of Canada, and also live my dream.
There are so many well-know women is our present and past: Oprah, Mother Teresa, Brené Brown, Marie Forleo, Madonna, and countless others who inspire my path. (Yes, Madonna! If you want to know why her and the others feel free to ask.)
However, it’s also the women around me: mentors, friends, my clients, women in business, and other women I’ve never even met. I see so many qualities in them — from what they do to who they are — that shape what they can accomplish. I see where they are ahead of me in their life by age or success and I use that to inspire what I want to achieve and where I want to be in the future.
Seeing how others live can give permission to how I will create my life. However, I have to be careful not to compare myself, to not let the ego beat me down or take me away from my purpose.
I won’t be exactly like them because I’m a curator of what I love. I collect what it is about what they’re doing and who they’re being that I love, and like a pioneer, I put it together in my own way. I’m attracting, and creating my own dreams, my own vision of the life I want. Then I will continue to Blaze a Trail for other women in a similar way.
My Future Self:
In coaching I often take my clients through a guided meditation where they get to meet their Future Self. To see yourself 5, 10 or even 20 years in the future is really powerful. Thankfully I was able to go through this with another coach and meet myself in the future.
Of course I didn’t actually meet her in real life, but I tell you it felt that way. I went to her house, I saw where she lived, how she lived including the 2 floors of windows and the colorful artwork. I saw what she looks like and what it felt like to be around her: she was calm, welcoming, grounded, successful, knew a lot and was having a great impact on those she connected with.
Then she gave me a gift, a key. But when I went to take it from her, it disappeared. She said, “You’re the key. The key to unlock the greatness in others.” This one statement has fueled a lot of my decisions and strongly impacted how I create my life. For that I’m grateful.
So to you reading this, to Emily and to all the amazing women out there – what inspires you? Who inspires you? Who are the women in business that you admire? And are you even consciously creating your own life? I’d love to know.
Here is exactly what you need this time of year!
Not just a PSL or warm clothes, but so much more.
It's the final quarter and if you are wanting to finish the year strong and get yourself ready to kill it in 2018 then this is the key.
A specific Game plan - hear why!
Don't let one area deplete the success of other areas. Instead learn about using one area to push the results in many areas of life. This way you'll feel confident in your decisions and be clear about what to be working on and guarantee great results.
P.S. Here is a great opportunity for you to have me help you make your game plan!
A while back I wrote on confidence being sexy and it got a lot of attention.
I received posts on my blog, emails and it even triggered a few people.
Then when I was asked to contribute to FabUplus Magazine on confidence I knew this information needed to come up again.
(BTW make sure you check out FabUplus because they have such a cool message for the world! "Our message is that all women are beautiful, original, not only good enough, but exceptional, not just here, but here for a purpose."
Confidence is inner and outer. How we show up as a person and how we appear to others.
As you can see in the images this woman is confident, sure of herself and not afraid to flaunt it (without having to be naked or show a lot of skin). When women are showing up this way they have better success, more happiness and increase their life satisfaction.
To read the original blog with the "3 Steps to Sexy Confidence" along with do's and don'ts please go to: Confidence is Sexy When Worn Right
Adults love asking children, “What do you want to be when you grow up?”
I thought about this today because last night I was leading a mastermind for a lady in my tribe. She wasn't fulfilled in her career.
She walked away with a clear solution, but I wonder how she would say.
My first grade answer to that question was “to be a teacher.” Do you remember yours?
It’s an interesting question posed at an expansive time in our lives. The child in us is able to speak without fear of the challenges and with an innocence of possibility.
But this question muddles being and doing together and it lacks some crucial follow up questions to help us get clear on the details about our life path. So, it’s no wonder that many of us as adults come to a point where we feel…muddled!
I certainly did.
I did become a teacher. AND I wasn’t completely happy. I loved teaching the kids and helping them, yet something didn’t seem to fit.
It didn’t feel completely right AND I felt terrible GUILT for it.
(How many of us are familiar with that?)
There I was being ungrateful for what I had (said the saboteur in me!) I had promotions, a good paying job, great co-workers and even a great boss. The child in me was right… I wanted to be a teacher. But the adult in me never asked some crucial follow up questions, such as “A teacher of what?” and “Why?”
If you are feeling a bit muddled about your path (or know someone who is!) now is a great time to ask some deeper questions. Play along with me!
As a child, what did you say you wanted to be?
A doctor, lawyer, engineer?
Now, ask yourself these crucial follow up questions:
You see, the child in me was clear on the first question. I knew I wanted to be a teacher. But it was only when I explored more deeply that I realized coaching was the path for me. I filled in important details.
I love teaching and helping, but I also value variety and going with the flow. Working with clients on their chosen topics and going at our own pace allows for all of that. I found my perfect fit.
So try it yourself! Maybe revisiting the career you wanted as a child will confirm the path you are currently on or will shed some light on what is missing for you.
Let me know if your 1st grader was right or not!
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