I’m writing this blog from Bali, Indonesia, where I’m attending the Global Speakers Summit. However, I wanted to take a moment to share some of my biggest disappointments as a collaborative author in other people's books or from what I’ve seen in other collaborative books. I want you to know what to watch out for because, in the beginning, I didn’t know. Now that I’ve joined more and more collaborative books—I think I’ve been in seven—I know what to watch for and what I wish more collaborative books would do. Also, if you’re reading this blog, we also have this as a podcast episode and as a YouTube video. Side note--our collaborative book Dynamic Women Trailblazer Secrets just came out, and we have Leadership Secrets coming out next year. The first two books in the series were Success Secrets and Confidence Secrets, and now we’re putting out the fourth book, which will be published in February 2025. If you want information on that, check out this link. Let’s go through My 9 Biggest Disappointments as a Collaborative Author (Aka what to watch out for) #1: No strategy for writing. In my very first collaborative book, I was given the topic, the logistics of how many words, what font, and how it needed to be submitted. I was given 10 days to submit, but I received absolutely no strategy or support for writing it. No one told me, “This is how to come up with your topic” or “This is a good strategy to have.” It was basically just, “Give us your piece.” So what I did was book sessions with my business advisor and marketing strategist about it, and I had that ability to go back and forth with them on what's the best strategy for this, what message should I be putting out based on the kind of the offerings I had at the time. That's what I think is really important, and that's why, for us in our collaborative books, we have a few things that we do.
These are some of the things you need to be looking for. #2: Not having an editor They might say, “We're going to just read it over to make sure that it’s ok” or something, but not actually having someone do the editing. When I did my first book, Dynamic You, which is the nine pillars of being a dynamic woman, I had three different types of editors, and I didn't know there were different types of editors. When we do our books, we have an editor who reads your piece over. I also read your piece over and while we don't necessarily change content or do major editing, we're looking for…
We're really wanting all the pieces in the book to be the best they can be, while also honouring your unique voice you have. You don't want to have no editing of your piece in a collaborative book but you also don't want to have too much editing where they basically just rewrite your piece and you're like, “I don't even recognize it anymore.” You want to have your unique voice still coming out in your piece. #3: No social links in your piece so readers could reach out to you easily I can remember being part of a book, and there was no ability for the reader to get in touch with me. There wasn't even a bio. There was just my name as the author of the piece. If they wanted to get in touch with me, they'd have to Google me and make sure they found the right Diane Rolston. I don't want that for the readers of my collaborative books. I want them to love the piece, love the message, and then get in touch with you. We always have three social links that you can share. Maybe it’s your…
Whatever it is. You'll have three so that your reader can get in touch with you in the best way. That's something you want to look for in collaborative books. Again, we don't want it to be salesy, but let's make it easy for the reader to get in touch with you, especially if they want to work with you, or they want to book you as a speaker, or whatever it may be. We want to make the path to connecting with you as simple as possible. #4: No social media assets, so also no consistent brand The people who put the book together give you no social media assets, so meaning there are…
Because there's no social media assets with a lot of the other opportunities, or they have their own, but very few, there's no consistent brand. We offer a whole bunch of different types of assets, again, because you have different social platforms, newsletters and so on. We do banners, stories, posts, reels, videos, etc. We do it all so that you have whatever you need for whatever platform. That gets me to my fifth thing to look for. #5: No personalized social media assets you could share. A lot of collaborative books don't do any personalized social media assets. We announce our authors with their image and name. #6: No headshot on the cover and/or no name. Also, it’s important to have your headshot on the cover. Some collaborative books don’t have that - they just have the publisher or main author on the book. In cases where your headshot is there, they don't put your name on it. That's pretty bad. On the back of the cover of the book we put all the images of all the authors, plus their name. Because I don't know how many times I've seen books, and it just has all the images and no names, so you don't know who the people are, or it has all their names and no images. Again, this is something to pay attention to it. I think it's super important to your experience as a collaborative author. #7: There’s no celebration or party or acknowledgment There's no party, no launch party, nothing happens. The book just comes out, and then it's flat. But it's really important that there's an opportunity for a celebration where all the authors get together and their fans, their supporters, and their readers come together to be able to not only launch the book, but acknowledge that these people wrote a piece and are now published authors. That celebration piece is so important to really lock this in as a milestone in your life. Look for opportunities for collaborative books that have a celebration of some sort. We now do them virtually because we have authors from all over Canada, all over the states and into other countries. A virtual party makes sense. We used to do two in Canada, one in Ontario, and one in British Columbia. But now we find that because our authors are everywhere, a virtual party makes more sense. #8: No wholesale copies You need to be able to buy the book at wholesale rate. What this is going to do for you is, then you can make some money off of every book. Or if you choose to use the book for leads, to hand out as “Thank you gifts” to give to clients, to use as an add-on to packages, whatever it may be, you need to be able to buy the book at a low rate, so that you can make money off of it or, as I said, so that it can be something you give away, but your expenses aren't too high. I've been part of books where I have to pay retail for the book, and it then doesn't make sense for me to heavily promote that book, order the book, carry that book to my speaking engagements. I'm only going to do that with collaborative books that I can get at wholesale rate. That's one thing that we do, and we also don't have a minimum purchase. You can buy them as you need them, which is a lot better than having to buy 3000 books and have them sitting in your basement or your closet. The other thing around wholesale copies is, I also share 21 plus ways of using the book to gain more sales, more opportunities, more clients, more speaking engagements, whatever it is, just ways to use the book to move you towards your goals. #9: No connection with the other authors I think it's really important that you have the opportunity to connect with the other authors. One of the benefits of being in a book is being able to expand your network by connecting with the other authors. When we look at all the different things that we offer, and you can check it here, there are multiple times you can connect with other authors.
These are all the extra pieces that you get, where you get to hang out with the other authors. Wrapping Up Those are the nine different things to look for in being a collaborative author. I didn't know these before I started joining other collaborative author opportunities. These are things I was very disappointed with. One of our authors came into our Trailblazer Secrets book, and then she had an opportunity to be a part of another book. She probably invested four times as much as she invested with my opportunity in the Dynamic Women's Secrets, and she said she got not even close to a quarter of what we offered. She just thought what I did was the standard, and it's not. I'd love for you to be part of Leadership Secrets, which is coming out in February 2025. September 27 is the final opportunity for you to get a Return On Investment Strategy Session. That's a one-on-one session with me where we're going to look at how you can use being a part of this collaborative book as a way to propel you towards your goals so that you can get a higher ROI or return on investment. I'm saying you can easily tenfold it, because you can expand your network, attract leads and opportunities to you, then you can use them to increase your revenue, get you closer to your goals and so much more. There are so many other things, but they're specific to you. The ROI session disappears, Friday, September 27 11:59pm, Pacific time. You don't want to miss out on that. That is a huge bonus. My business coach is like, “Diane, that's offering too much”, but I want to do that for you, because, again, that's another disappointment is that I never had the opportunity to do an ROI session with the person giving me the opportunity for the book and seeing things from their eyes, especially because I've been in seven books and I've put out three of my own, so I've had a lot of experience with collaborative books and strategy around books, and would love to really dive in deep and come up with some great ideas for you. I'm going to go hit the pool now. Thank you for reading. I really appreciate you. If you haven't yet, share this with a friend who you think has a great leadership story or secret, or is thinking about being part of a book, because these nine things are huge in not being disappointed, in being a part of a collaborative book. Read my other blogs:
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Hey, high achieving successful woman… you’ve done a lot, so why do you sometimes feel like you're stuck in a rut? Maybe you're feeling a little bit like you're doing the same thing like it's Groundhog Day, BUT you've had a lot of professional successes - so you shouldn’t feel a lack of satisfaction - should you? Even if you've become an expert and comfortable in where you are today, you could still feel like you are missing something. It's time to have a little bit of success in a new way. So, in this blog, I’ll share the number one thing that will create more satisfaction for you as a business owner. My personal experience Back in 2008, I tore my ACL playing rugby. If you didn't know, I was a varsity rugby player. I’ve played soccer competitively my whole life as well. I've also played lots of sports—basketball, volleyball, track and field, and I’ve done quite well at them. I've always seen myself as a competitive athlete. No matter what I went into, I won awards, and won MVPs. I don't say this to be like, “Oh, look at me. I'm so amazing.” It's more so because that's the level I was at, and there was a lot of competition, a lot of pushing myself, and striving in a way that felt so good as an athlete. Maybe you can relate in another area of your life where you were full-on in doing it. Usually, when we're in that great energy, that resonance, that’s what I talked about in the previous blog called "Hell Ya Energy." We're in that energy, that resonance, that flow, and it's really good for us. There might come a time when you're like, “Why am I not feeling that anymore?” This is where I'm talking about if you feel like you're stuck in a rut. You may be feeling a lack of the same things that you were having in the past. For me, what happened was I tore my ACL, which meant I could no longer play rugby, as I was needing ACL reconstruction and surgery, then rehab. At that time, it made me feel super depressed. I was looking at all the things in my life. I had all these successes professionally, but then I was like, “Why am I feeling off? Why am I feeling not happy, not satisfied in my life and about things?” I thought, “Wow, I don't even really have permission to complain because my life is amazing on paper.” I was trying to figure out what it was. I'm very achievement-oriented, goal-oriented, and I was doing all these things. Eventually, I hired a life coach, and I found that, in working with her, one of the key pieces that I found was that I wasn't honoring all of my values. Challenge One of my values—and I don't mean morals and ethics, I mean a value, the things that we ourselves, that we would stand on a soapbox about, that if somebody dishonored them, we'd be pissed off—one of my values was challenge. I honoured challenge in competitive sports, but in this new place, I was in this new season of being injured and not being able to play at a competitive level, not even being able to play at all. At that point in my life, I had played for 25 years and I only ever had 10 days off at Christmastime. I had always played sports and always played at a high level. It was really hard for me. I'm not saying that you've given up something big like that, or that you've been injured, but there's potentially a part of you that is missing the value that I adore, which is challenge. You may feel bored, but you're not bored—you just need a good challenge. What I realized for myself is that I needed to create challenge in my life. Because I wasn't depressed, I just needed a new challenge. The same thing could be true for you. When we are high achievers and have so much success, we are also in this place of striving and driving and wanting everything. While I now see that satisfaction is more important—we should measure life according to our satisfaction and not measure life according to our success—honoring our values is such a huge piece. Creating challenge for yourself is so important. Now, why challenge? Well, it gets you out of your comfort zone because a lot of times, you are good at all the things you do, and you know so much about everything that you do that there’s not enough spark there for you. When you have challenge, you're pushed out of your comfort zone. It has you grow and stretch, and you get to be in that growth mindset. You get to improve and find out, “Can I really do this?” because you're not an expert at it yet. I did African drumming, and I'll tell you, I sucked at African drumming. It actually looks super cool and super easy—it’s not. I was terrible, but I stuck with it, and it humbled me. I was able to sit as the student, not as the teacher. This is important because I'm sure you are so good at so many things that these are true:
But you don't always get to sit in the student seat and feel stretched and feel poured into. Taking on a challenge where you get to learn something new and put yourself out there into the world, depending on what it is. My next thing is going to be glassblowing, probably. Again, something I’m not going to be good at, and it’s going to challenge me. If you feel stuck or bored, you're neither. You just need a new challenge. You need a bold challenge, or you need a personal challenge. You've been checking off the boxes in your career or in your business, and it might be time to branch out. I gave you a few ideas. But what I encourage you to do is take a challenge that will help you professionally and also help you personally. The challenge of writing a book Here's one that I had back in 2016. I had the challenge of writing a book. I'll tell you, I sat on it for a year and did nothing with it until I agreed to provide 350 copies of my book for all the attendees at a convention. The problem is, I hadn't written the book yet! At that very moment, I took on the challenge to get it done in such a short timeframe. Now, I don't recommend doing this, but it's the thing that got me off my butt. It wasn't just the challenge piece; it was the commitment—another great C word. I took on the challenge, and then I committed to it. When I speak of challenge, you probably know challenges like a challenge when there's a service or a product that doesn't go to a customer properly, or a challenge where your CRM is down, or a challenge when your kid won’t put their shoes on. You've seen these challenges, and you face many different challenges. There are fires that you have to put out and problems that you have to solve. But what about a challenge that just helps you to grow, a challenge that helps you to feel alive and puts you in resonance? That moment, I held that book. I was on video, doing the unboxing, which was incredible. I think I might have teared up, or I was trying to be strong and not show my vulnerability, but it was such an incredible moment, a very different challenge that I was able to conquer. A challenge for you Have you thought of doing a book? Have you thought of being in a book? You have the opportunity to do it. You have the opportunity to do it with not only me, but with a bunch of other amazing women, other high achievers, other women who are having great success in their life, and they're taking on this opportunity like a fresh, exciting challenge to be able to do it. The only thing is, it's not actually going to be a challenge because everything is going to be done for you. Sounds good? Leadership Secrets Invitation Let me give you a little idea about what this is about. We've done Success Secrets. We also have Confidence Secrets, Trailblazer Secrets, and the next collaborative book is going to be Leadership Secrets. You're going to do a spread in the book. You can imagine, two pages—one side and then the other side—with a 400-word story, secrets on leadership, your bio, and some social links or connection links, so people can get a hold of you afterward. There's so much more I want to say about this, but I'll kind of pause it there because the purpose of this blog was to remind you that bringing in something fresh is going to stretch you a little bit, but it's also going to feel really exciting and new. When you've been doing what you've been doing for a while, you can get stuck in a rut and can have achieved all the things on the success side, but this can be something new. The joy of this is you will succeed. You will be published in February because you've got me as your mentor to take you through the process and make it super simple by having a book-writing strategy session, so you know exactly what to write about, how to boomerang business back to you with this piece, how to title it, how to do the whole thing. Also, another bonus that we give is a Mastermind Day, where you can ask me questions, get support from the other authors, and read your piece to others so they can give you feedback. This way, you’ll feel solid about what you're submitting. We also have editors that will edit your piece, so you don't have to worry about it looking good or sounding good—it will. After that, it's like, well, now you have a book, and because we're going to do the whole publishing process for you, at that point, it's like, "Now I have a book. What do I do?" We give you "Author in a Box"—all the press releases, all the email copy, we do a launch party for you, and we give you all the personalized, branded social media posts and videos and everything so you can promote not only the book but also you in the book. You get to celebrate! Because I'll tell you, some parts of being stuck in a rut come from not celebrating your successes, and that's so key for having the motivation to keep going. Being successful can be tiring, right? Go to this link. You’ll see all the options there. There are two options— Silver and Gold. It's going to lay out very clearly all the things you get, and I would love to call you a co-author and have you be published in February of 2025. That’d be pretty amazing. Bonus Ending September 27th at 11:59 pm PDT Doors are closing on the bonus I’m offering of a ROI strategy session with me. It's a Return on Investment Strategy Session. You want that because in it, we are going to use to strategize how you're not only going to be in this book but how you're going to get a high return on the investment that you're going to make, so you can reach your personal and professional goals. I'll tell you, that's when you're in this process you’re not going to be bored, you’ll be excited, and you're not going to feel like you're stuck in a rut because you're going to take on a safe challenge. Let me know—do you love a challenge? Do you love that vibe of bringing something new into your life? You can reach out to me at [email protected] or connect with me on one of the major platforms. Read my other blogs:
Do you know the power of “Hell Ya” energy? Too much of the world is living in “Meh” energy. I don’t really have to explain that too much because you probably get it. For example, if someone offered you a dry roast beef sandwich, you'd likely think, 'Meh.' Not really excited about it, right? I wanted to talk about this because I feel like too many people are settling for 'meh,' for that feeling of …
…without actually going for that, full-blown amazing energy. If you start asking yourself, “Is this a Hell Ya?” it becomes an excellent compass for whether you should go for something or not. The reasons why people struggle to live in Hell Ya energy Too many people are also stuck in the 'Groundhog Day' loop—doing the same things every single day. We get to a point where we don’t know what we like anymore, what we want, or what we desire. This happens for a few reasons. Reason 1: Hustle Culture Everything is thrown at us—social media, advertising, everywhere you look: TV, phone, billboards, radio etc. Everyone’s telling you what you should like and what you should want. It’s totally dependent on the country you live in. Being in North America, I feel we’re bombarded with hustle culture and things that really aren’t in our best interest. What they’re doing is pushing things that fuel their bank accounts. Reason 2: Lack Intention Another reason we struggle to live in Hell Ya energy is that we lack intention with our activities. We finish our workday, and then maybe we sit and scroll on our phones, or after dinner, we put on the TV. I don’t think there’s anyone who would say, “My plan for tonight is to scroll for an hour on my phone with mindless social media and then watch three hours of TV.” Maybe you think, “Well, I’m going to watch that movie I’m so excited about,” or “I’m going to watch my show, and I’m really excited about it.” That can be the Hell Ya energy, but we spend too much time without intention, and then we wonder, “Where did the day go? Where did the night go?” Even those moments of between, we've lost the moments of between and deciding what we're going to do because our default is social media. Our default is media in general. Our default is things we wouldn’t intentionally choose. Not only are we bombarded with messages telling us what to buy and eat, but the things put in front of us are often of poor quality. We’re given poor-quality foods. If you've ever travelled to another country that values local, pure, and organic ingredients rather than all this processed crap we get, you know the difference. The other day, there was a video of a woman on an airplane returning from her trip to Europe. She picks up a piece of what looks like bread or cake and takes a bite. The caption said, “Your first bite of processed food after eating real food in Europe.” Later, she had to defend herself because people were upset with her opinion, but it was the truth. We don’t have the best quality food here, and that’s why we overeat—our bodies are searching for nutrients. I spoke a little bit about this in the last blog. We also have poor-quality clothes. Yes, there are amazing clothes out there—organic, locally made, and handmade—but there’s also a lot of fast fashion. Of course, you end up with that “dime a dozen” item of clothing. I’ve mentioned it before, but we spend our time in many ways that feel like 'meh.' I say “spend” because we’re not investing our time. The other day, I realized I’m not reading nearly as much as I want to. I’m not investing time in my Bible, doing devotions, or praying as much as I want to. I’m not going to the gym as much as I want to. It's not a “should”—it’s a desire. Yes, a bunch of the things I’m filling my time with are great, but there’s still a lot of 'meh' stuff in there. What Hell Ya energy is Hell Ya energy is when you get an email invitation to an event, and as you read it, you think, “Well, maybe I’ll go if I’m available. I’ll see if it fits in. I’ll see if I have the time or energy to go.” That’s 'meh.' You don’t really care. Have you ever opened up an email invitation and thought, “Hell ya, I want to go to this!”? Right away, you're like, “Yep, count me in! I’m there!” That’s what we’re looking for in life—more of that Hell Ya energy. Now, I get that there are things in life, like doing taxes or cleaning your house, where you think, “I don’t really want to do this, but I know I have to.” You have the desire to be in alignment with the government and to live in a clean, uncluttered place. Ideally, we want about 80% of our lives to be filled with Hell Ya energy. I feel bad for people in jobs or businesses they hate because Hell Ya energy puts you in resonance. In coaching, we talk about how it’s energy and gives you power. It’s like you could do it all day. Think of an activity you could do all day. For me, it’s being creative, coaching, training, or speaking on stage. I might get tired, but I don't feel the need to stop. I can just go, go, go because I’m in resonance—I’m in flow. I’m in energy. It’s easy. There’s flow. What’s the opposite? What “Meh” energy is Meh is dissonance. It could be worse than neutral—it’s settling, or even worse than that. It’s actually a negative. Dissonance is friction. It’s hard. It takes a ton of energy, and you might have to motivate yourself. What you can do I encourage you to start looking for Hell Ya energy with your decisions. Look for activities, people, events, food, clothes, travel—everything in your life that gives you that Hell Ya feeling. Look for what excites you. That’s why I took a stand-up comedy class. That’s how I ended up taking Japanese in university. I thought, “Whoa, that’s cool. I want to do that.” We’re looking for that energy in our lives because it makes our lives richer. It helps us make decisions more easily by following our gut, our intuition, our internal energy meter that tells us where to go. I saw a post the other day that said you could spend an hour a day connecting with your spouse, your partner, or even your kids or best friend. The idea is that you have time to do this if you have time to watch TV. That kind of hit me because I thought, “Whoa, an hour to do that? I don’t have that time!” But I have spent an hour watching TV. I’ve been guilty of scrolling on my phone throughout the day. A simple exercise for you I encourage you to take out a piece of paper, set a timer for five minutes, and go through your life. Write down all the things you’re currently doing—activities, clients, foods, places, and people—that have Hell Ya energy for you. Then make another list of things that have 'meh' energy. You might have to look back at your calendar and remember all the things you did or the things coming up next week. Write down those things that make you think, 'Meh.' Finally, create a new list of new Hell Ya energy—things that excite you. One thing that excites me moving forward is taking a glassblowing class. My husband and I are also going to start ballroom dancing. These activities have energy and excitement for me. Thankfully, because I’ve been sharing about this Hell Ya energy, others have been pointing things out to me and sharing opportunities. I even had a connection through CAPS (Canadian Association of Professional Speakers) who sent me a course on writing my one-woman show. Hell ya, count me in! That’s something I already want to do. Over the next few weeks, practice this. When someone asks if you want to hang out, do something, or go somewhere, or if you're deciding what to eat or wear, ask yourself, “Is this Hell Ya energy, or is this Meh energy?” Is it resonance—exciting, energetic flow—or dissonance—friction, lack of desire, and difficulty? Use this as your compass to guide you in the right direction. The more you live in Hell Ya energy, the more resonance you'll experience, and I promise you'll be happier and more fulfilled in life. So, who of your friends needs to read this blog? Please share it with them! Until next time, everyone—stay dynamic. Read my other blogs:
Do you believe in quality over quantity? Are you craving more in life right now? I'm going to talk about how you're potentially craving the best of it all. I found myself recently craving better things—not more things, but better things. My personal experiences I'm just about to head out to Tokyo and then the Philippines and Bali. As I talk with my travel friend, she says, "You know, Diane, I've gone backpacking, I've stayed in hostels. I've done the whole cheap and cheerful thing, and I'm just beyond that now. I want a nice place. I want to stay in quality." Maybe you're feeling this way too. I realized as I get older—there are certain things I will not do anymore.
It's not even just for travel and food. It's spilling out into my relationships, my home, the projects I say yes to and no to, and the clients I work with. In every single area of my life, I want the best. It's not that I didn't want the best before. I valued other things over having the best or more things, rather than fewer things. When I think about North America, we have this way of needing to have more. You need to have 20 pairs of sunglasses and multiple pairs of shoes, and a bigger, better car, and it continues and continues. But there's also a factor around the fact that we're getting less. If you travel to other countries, you may see that portion sizes are smaller because they contain more nutrition. When you aren't getting the quality you're looking for in one area of your life, you will seek excess in that area and others. You're going to be wanting more. Our bodies want more food because we're getting less nutrition. We're getting more clothing and items from cheap places like Shein and Temu because we’re craving something else. More doesn’t fill the void. But the fact that we're not satisfied with what it is, we are drawn to do more, get more, buy more, and have more. But it's providing us with less happiness, less connection, less nutrition, and more yearning for other things. That's why we often feel overwhelmed by the amount of stuff, feel overworked because our schedules are completely chock-full of things because they're not the right things. We're eating too much, or we're getting overweight because we're never satisfied. We have all these connections on Facebook and LinkedIn and Instagram and stuff, but how many of them are actually quality connections? I'm at this place in my life—and maybe you are too—where, frankly, less is more. I'm just sick of how much stuff, how much has been in my schedule, and I really want quality over quantity in all areas of life. That's why I love watching Tiny House Nation. I'm a little obsessed with watching people downsize and enter these tiny homes. I don't need an 8,000-square-foot home. But, I also don't want to live in just 350 square feet because I have a family and I value my space, so I can recharge, especially with the work I do. It's very external and very client-focused and I’m often in presentation mode. This peaked for me too when I met some friends who lived on a boat—an actual boat with a house in the bottom of it. I was really intrigued because the kids only had a very small floor cupboard where they could put their toys, and they only had a few toys. But the thing is, they actually played with them. Where I look at what my kids have, and they have lots of toys, and they barely play with them. These kids on this boat, they were so happy, and they were imaginative, and they were helpful around the house, and they had rich friendships. I thought, “Wow, this comes from choosing less, but the best.” This is the joy of focusing on the quality. But we're not as intentional about our lives sometimes because society dictates how we should be, and it's that more being shoved down our throats all the time. Over the past few years, I've been streamlining my business and only choosing the best. I've been focusing on having the best in my home, the best in my life, and the best connections. Are you wanting that too? I'm sure you're at this point in your life that you go, “Wow, I'm not 20 anymore.” You've grown in wisdom, you've grown in experience, and you've grown in taste in what you want, and you're not going to settle for garbage or mediocre anymore. The benefits of focusing on a quality-over-quantity lifestyle I will talk through some of the benefits of focusing on a quality-over-quantity lifestyle, where you are going for the best in whatever that term is for you. It doesn't need to be the most expensive; it's not necessarily the biggest, but it's what you are craving as the best for you. In the wheel of life, for myself and my clients I'm always looking for what is the best in every single area, meaning what is ideal for you at this stage of life, with what you're desiring, what is best for you. #1: Long-term satisfaction and savouring the flavor of life You're at a point now where you believe that you're going to look for long-term satisfaction over a short-term gain. You want to savour it—savour the flavor, per se. Think of a gourmet meal where every single bite is rich in flavour and fresh ingredients. It's satisfying. It's memorable. Instead of stuffing your face with fast food, you don't want that anymore. You want to indulge in something that's truly delicious. You see how you can have experiences that maybe give you less quantity, but make up for it in quality so you are satisfied. You're eating less food, and having experiences that maybe cost a little bit more. But you know that you're going to have a better memory of it. No one really remembers the street meat they had in college after the bar. You're not going to remember how good it was. You're not going to remember the burger from that fast food joint. It just served a purpose to fill your belly. But what you are going to remember are those special meals that you've gone to where you had the chef’s table or the food told a story. I lived in Japan for 3 years back in my early 20’s. I remember my first breakfast in Japan at a ryokan, which is like a Japanese-style bed and breakfast, it’s very traditional, and they gave me this tray of foods, with little amounts of foods in each of the bowls: egg, rice, soup, pickled veg and fish. I spent time with the food, I enjoyed the food, and the food was all natural, fresh ingredients, real foods, no fillers, and I will always look back and remember that meal. Now I'm thinking about my trip soon when I’ll have just three days in Tokyo. This time it’s just a stopover before going to the Philippines to meet my virtual assistant team. It’s not about just savouring the flavour of the best restaurants, but also the places, the people and the accommodation. I want to see the best attractions, temples and natural wonders. I want to stay at a great hotel. I'm staying right in the heart of Tokyo so that I am close to everything because my time is so valuable. You probably believe time is valuable too. Are your actions backing that up? Maybe you have aging parents, or they've passed. Maybe you have other people around you who are becoming widows, which is crazy to think. I'm going to be 45 in September, and it’s crazy to think I know many widows and I see how life is short. My dad passed at almost 80. So I'm more than the middle of his age. Craving the best is all about making smart choices that will pan out for you in the long-term big time because it will help in other areas. Think right now about where can you savour the flavor? Where can you slow down a little bit, have a little bit less, and know that's going to give you long-term satisfaction? #2: Value You appreciate value. Yes, you want more bang for your buck and all that. But you're at this point where you think, “Oh, I'd rather have one classic piece of clothing, one amazing outfit that I'm going to feel like a superstar in, rather than 10 outfits that fall apart after a few washes or look terrible.” You know that it's about the quality, the value you're going to get out of it. My rule used to be that I don't buy linen because it's terrible to take care of. But I've heard such good things about wearing natural fabrics. Maybe you have jumped on this bandwagon, but I hadn't, because earlier, I was more focused on wanting life to be easy and efficient. Buying linen that crinkles and wrinkles, and then having to iron it every time I wear it wasn’t efficient for me. But the thing is, now I'm going to give it a try. And if it's a high-quality piece I'm willing to invest a little bit more in something that will last longer and I will take better care of it. I want to buy really amazing pieces, not fast fashion—amazing pieces that I cherish and get excited to wear, like seeing a really great friend. Value is the second piece of why moving to craving the best and is going to be better for you. #3: Personal fulfillment I really want you to have that feel-good factor most of the time, and that comes from having high-quality experiences, high-quality items and people in your life. There's a difference between having a beautiful shirt or a cheap shirt. Again, you could be spending the same amount of money. You could buy one shirt for $100 or ten shirts at $10 each—either way, you've spent the same amount of money. This isn't about money; it's about how you feel when you're wearing these pieces and when you're having these experiences. If I have one amazing superstar outfit, I’ll show up better in my business and life. Choose the things that really bring you joy and get you fired up. For example, if you're the type of person who loves thrilling roller coasters at amusement parks, great, go for it! That brings you joy, so that's what you should go for instead of a dull merry-go-round, because you're going to talk about that amazing roller coaster forever. But if you love the swings that go up in the air and it brings you joy, then wait in line for that and skip the roller coaster if you don’t like it. It’s about choosing what's right for you and craving the best in every area of life. Often when we settle with good enough, we will feel an emptiness, a yearning for more and itch we can’t scratch. Sometimes a lack of fulfillment personally can have us blaming people like our spouse or leaving a job because we feel that is the cause. It can lead to bad habits, addiction and drastic moves. #4: Sustainability Quality over quantity. It isn’t just great for you—having quality items that last a long time is so good for the planet. For example, the other day, we had to move some things into our carry-on luggage from our suitcase, and I didn’t realize my daughter had a full-size toothpaste in there. I felt bad for the toothpaste and for the environment because that toothpaste went straight into the garbage rather than being used, even though it was just a $2 or $3 toothpaste. It wasn’t about the money; it was about the planet and how it was such a waste. Excess and not having the best causes us to over buy and toss things away. It kills me to see the amount of waste in the world. I grew up in a very eco-conscious family where everything had a new purpose. Everything could be reused. For example, empty toilet paper rolls were cut in half, and my dad used them as starter holders for his plants in the garden. The great thing is, you put them in the garden, and they naturally compost. Actually, quality over quantity will make you super eco-chic. It’s not beneath me to buy second-hand or take hand-me-downs for my kids. It’s not beneath me to eat leftovers from the day before. I have a strong value for caring for the environment, and craving the best means you’re not just chucking things and getting rid of them. You’re going to value and care for the things you have because you love them. #5: Avoiding overwhelm You get to avoid overwhelm. I mentioned decluttering and having less, but it's more about choosing to keep things really simple and streamlined. This applies to your business, career, and the things you do. It’s so satisfying to have less in your calendar, less in your home, and fewer things in your closet to care for. Having that clutter-free zen in all areas of life means you can truly love and be present for the things that matter most. #6: Depth of experience and connection I’ve realized with the Dynamic Women Community I knew everyone by name, which chapter they had joined, and their professions. But after growing to eight locations, running events in each location every single month, it got to the point where I didn’t know everyone anymore. I’d think I was meeting someone for the first time, only to realize it was actually the second time. I didn’t like that for myself. I desired closer connections and that would mean less. I see how the quality and depth of connections grow when you focus on the best relationships for you. Over the years, I’ve let some relationships go. During COVID, my Facebook account was deactivated, and I went from almost 4,000 connections (or more, maybe closer to 5,000—I don’t remember) to just 1,500 connections now. Now, I’m more thoughtful about who I allow into my life and who gets to be in my circle. It’s not that I think I’m the best and not everyone gets to be my friend. It’s more about who I’m most connected to and with whom I can deepen a relationship. Maybe you’re thinking about that too—maybe it’s time to cull your contact list or reconsider who you’re connected with on social media and who you gift your time to. Wrapping Up These are just a few reasons why you might also be craving the best in every area of your life. This realization hit me during a recent coaching session. I have a few coaches, and I realized that I really want to curate an amazing group of women who come together to break bread, share a meal, who are also craving the best. It got me thinking about how much I loved Dynamic Women events years back, where you got to connect with a lot of people and get a taste of what they were like. But even though it was still a big room of 30 people, maybe at our bigger events, 100 or more people, maybe you’ve been to conferences or conventions with 1,500 or 5,000 people, and it was overwhelming. You don’t get to have that moment of really connecting with people. But when you have that real connection, you don’t have to do a ton of follow-up calls or collect business cards, because you’ll go straight into their contact list on their phone. That’s the difference—the difference between, “Can I have your card? Let’s connect on LinkedIn,” and “What’s your number? Let’s meet up next week for coffee.” So I created this event. I’m going to do one and we’ll see where it goes. I feel this is going to be so good, so rich, and so juicy. You’re invited! Women in North Vancouver, BC, and the surrounding area, or if you want to fly in, you’re invited to this amazing event called Taste. Our first one is on September 11th, from 6:30 to 9:30 PM. It’s an exclusive dinner party experience for successful female business owners in North Vancouver, BC, or the surrounding area. You can drive in, or you can travel in, but I’m warning you, this is not your typical transactional networking event. Where I’m at in my business, I don’t need to meet hundreds or thousands of people anymore. I just want strategic and enriching friendships, strategic business relationships, and deep friendships in my life. I have a bunch of those, but I’m always open for more because, again, I’m craving the best. With Taste, the intention is to satisfy your cravings for energizing conversations—not the small-talk garbage you get at other events—and deeper connections where you’re like, “Whoa, we’re on the same wavelength!” The major focus is on who you are, rather than what you do. You don’t have time for fluff. You don’t have time to show up at an event and get pitched to in the first 30 seconds. It’s time to show up in a place where you get to fully taste—taste the food, get a taste for what others are about and taste the experience. We’re doing a three-course meal: appetizer, entrée, and dessert. You’ll get a welcome signature cocktail, networking, and conversation with a curated group of women. So please check it out. If you’re in the area, I’d love to see you, and so would the other women who are coming. What can you expect? We’re going to kick off the evening with fun, warm introductions—not those boring elevator pitches. Then we’ll dive into our topic for the night: balancing being strong and feminine. We’re leaders, we’re powerful, we’re independent, but we also want to be the amazing, wonderful feminine women that we are. But how do we balance that when we’re often in our masculine at work? Why did I create Taste? Well, our time and energy are precious. At this level that we’re at,—and probably the level you’re at in your life, business, or career—it’s all about quality over quantity. Like in business, I’m super selective about who I work with. I’m very intentional about where I go, what I do, and who I spend my time with. But we don’t want to be lone wolves. We don’t want to be silos, doing all the work and being leaders all by ourselves. I created Taste to connect more intentionally and, frankly, to have some fun and eat some good food. If you’re interested in joining us, this is a curated event where I’m asking everyone who wants to attend to fill out an application so that we get the right people there. If you are someone that likes to card sling, you love small talk, and you love surface level networking, this is not the event for you. This is for those who want to meet others who are aligned with themselves, who can be intentional, high-level women who want quality over quantity. I invite you to check it out and to get your ticket. It’s a small group, because we are doing quality over quantity, because I'm craving the best, and I know you are too, and this is going to be an amazing experience. Read my other blogs:
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