How Collaboration with Women Leaders Shapes Leadership Perspectives

In this special segment from the Dynamic Women podcast, we explore how collaboration and community with other women leaders influence leadership perspectives. I engage in an insightful conversation with Carol Surbey, Karen Ta, and Gigi Blair about their experiences.

One of the questions I asked them was, “How has collaboration with other women leaders influenced your perspective on leadership?” Here are their answers.

Carol: When I lived in Vancouver, I belonged to a couple of women's networks, and they were invaluable. They allowed me the opportunity to put language to what I was experiencing. I was in a world of men who weren't great communicators. As we've already determined, communication is huge.

Stepping out and stepping in, trusting other women to help you articulate what you're feeling and thinking when you might not have the language around it, that has been absolutely huge for me.

Diane: Yes, other women get it.

I remember being invited to a high-income-earning mastermind that happened to have only men in it. They said I could bring my spouse, and I asked, "What is my husband going to do with all the ladies?" Their response: "Oh, they normally go shopping." When I asked what the group of members normally do for fun at the end of the mastermind, they said, "We got a big screen TV on the roof and watched the basketball game."

I wondered about the kids, and they said, "Oh, the wives take care of the kids." Wow! I was not going to fit into this group. This really highlights the importance of being with your people, whoever that may be, whether it's other women, other business owners, or in Karen's case, women who culturally understand her.

Karen: I'm really lucky because I get the chance to work with a lot of smart women who bring strengths that I may not necessarily have. I should clarify that I've met many capable men as well who have influenced my leadership style. Both women and men bring in strengths from a collaboration standpoint.

When I think about the inclusion network I built and the smart women I worked with, my co-chair was really great at navigating politics and strategic thinking, whereas I was more on the implementation and team-building side.

When you mentioned community, Diane, that brought in another thought. Women do have a different lens. There are specific things that women struggle with personally, and talking to another woman creates that safe space to show up authentically as a leader.

I'll give a quick example: We were both co-chairs leading the inclusion network. There was a specific initiative I was super passionate about, but I was also dealing with something personally; my mom was going through surgery. I had to take a step back and change my focus.

Just her understanding of the pressure I was under, including the additional cultural pressures as a daughter of an immigrant mom, there's heavy reliance on the daughter doing many things for the mother, made it easier for me to explain without going through excessive details. I didn't have the luxury to outsource or delegate in this circumstance, and she understood without requiring much explanation. She created a community and a safe space for me to share so I could show up differently as a leader while fulfilling my responsibilities as a daughter.

Diane: I'm glad you brought men into the conversation because there are many amazing men out there. What we're doing with the Dynamic Women podcast and the Dynamic Women Leadership Secrets book is giving a voice to women, and we're collaborating together. I appreciate your example of you and your co-chair, that ability to share vulnerably to get the proper support you need is so important.

Gigi: Most women leaders (probably leaders in general) would describe themselves as continual learners. They study, read, and listen a lot. But I believe that connecting with a group of peers in structured, facilitated dialogue is a critical column and the secret sauce of being able to live and lead well.

There's nothing that I have found to replicate that experience that comes from that space, which ends up becoming really sacred for the people in the group. We hear it over and over—leadership can be lonely. Everybody on this panel knows that, everybody listening knows that. Being connected in a group of peers that are dealing with similar issues takes a lot of the loneliness out of it and gives strength and courage, as well as best practice sharing and problem-solving. You can make progress quicker on many different issues. I'm a firm believer in the community piece of peer groups.

Diane: As you were saying, facilitated groups are key. Everyone is accountable to showing up and the facilitator keeps things moving, fair and accountability.

Gigi: Yes. Not just getting on the phone and chatting, which has its place too at the coffee shop. Structured, led dialogue facilitated by a skilled facilitator is the secret sauce.

Diane: Remember that even if you are a leader with hundreds of people working with you, it can still be lonely because you can't complain down, and sometimes you can't complain up. Having other people at the same level who understand you and giving yourself permission to lean on them is crucial.

If we're in the wrong places or wrong facilitated groups where we're trying to lean on someone who can't hold us, it's going to cause us to fall back. So readers, make sure you have an amazing community of people around you.

This interview is part of the Dynamic Women podcast, where we explore leadership, business, and personal development topics with successful women leaders. This panel was composed of four authors in the Dynamic Women Leadership Secrets Book. We invite you to join the Book Launch party happening on June 11, 3:30-5:30PM PDT. Save your spot here.