In this blog, I'm going to talk about the step you're missing on the way to achieving the success you want. It's funny because it's the final step, and it's the overlooked step. A lot of times in life, we have so many things we want to achieve in so many different areas of life. Yet, do you know what we forget? We forget the part that's the most fun, the part that's actually the most crucial to capturing the learning, locking in the feeling and building our confidence. What is it? It’s celebrating and making a big deal out of an achievement. I'm going to give you an example that kind of sparked this conversation for us today. My daughter’s baseball game My daughter plays baseball. Will she one day play professionally? Will she get all expenses paid scholarship for university? That’s not the goal. It’s about having fun and getting the benefits of playing organized sports. But she's not going to be the MVP of every game. She's in it because she's having fun. She's got friends there. She is pushing herself athletically. She's getting all the benefit. We feel like she's already won in that regard. But one game, recently, she caught a hit that was above her head. If you can imagine in baseball, even if you haven't played, you know that when someone catches the ball, and when it's straight hit from the batter, and they catch it, the player is automatically out. It was a pretty big hit. It was going to go into the outfield, and she put up her glove, she caught it. Yay, win number one! But then, she was standing between second and third, keeping it super simple for my non-baseball friends here, so the runner from second was going to third. She caught the ball, brought it down into her glove, and tagged the runner from second to third causing them to be out as well. It was a double play by her, solely her. This is a pretty big deal, especially at her level. Double plays don't happen very often. If they do, they're in a combination of different players, one passing to another, throwing to another. For one person to get a double play, it doesn't happen very often. There's not as much play when you're 12 years old and playing in the under thirteen's. But we wanted to make a big deal out of this. At the end of the game, I said to her, “Wow, that was an amazing double play. We need to celebrate.” She's like, “Oooh, what's that mean?” I said, “Well, we’ll celebrate! You can get something from the concession stand. We could get a McFlurry from McDonald's, or we could go get whatever you wanted at Dairy Queen.” She said, “Oh, can I get a blizzard?” “Of course, family blizzards”. We as a family after the game went to have blizzards in her honor. You may think, “Oh, no big deal. She didn't win the championship. She wasn't MVP. But for us, it was important for us to make that into a big deal – a celebration. You might be judging, “Well, that's not very healthy to be giving ice cream.” Whatever. We wanted to mark this special occasion and have her be the center of our attention for this moment based on this extraordinary performance – and ice cream is special for kids. Yes, we talk about committing to the team and playing well and doing your best and all that. But that was a special moment. When I think back, I remember the times when others celebrated me, and I was celebrated for what I did. My hope is this is something that sticks in her memory. You know what the fun thing was? She started hitting better the next game. She started being more confident as a player in the next game. Since then, she has become a higher-level player. Other people are noticing her confidence in the field and her ability. She's caught more balls. Now instead of this surprised face that she did on that double play, she's loving it. She's really embracing this kind of new level of success for her – and I see the celebration made a huge difference. Time to ask yourself It made me think, how often do you make a big deal about yourself or allow others to make a big deal for you out of common everyday occurrences?
Now every time it doesn't have to be “Hey, family, we're going for blizzards.” But could it be, “Ah, that's amazing. I'm going to go sit in the forest or I'm going to go walk on the beach because that's what I love to do.” Celebrating Boosts Your Confidence Do you actually celebrate? Because doing that action of celebrating will give you exactly what it gave my daughter. It will boost your confidence because you are being honoured for something good you did or for being able to get over a hard time. Your confidence and belief in yourself will go up, and that's huge. Also, your self-efficacy, the belief that you can do hard things or that you can apply yourself to different situations, will go up. What I've seen with clients is the ability to transfer achievements and skills. Your self-efficacy transfers over to you believing you can do things in other areas of life. I believe the confidence my daughter gained by being honoured for that achievement is going to carry over to other areas of her life as well, which is so exciting. Think of what can happen for you if you were to also do that. The next time you're doubting yourself, you'll be reminded of how it felt to be in that moment when you were celebrated. Your self-esteem, in general, will increase as well. The way you view yourself as a winner, or as an achiever, or as someone who can do good things, whatever you want to call it. That's going to help you when you're in the valley of another goal, the hard part of another achievement, or in another area of life, that feels hard. That's going to help you not get stuck because you're going to say, “I can do this. I can get through this.” You're going to be able to look over the waves, look past the storm, to the place where you say, “I'm going to get there. I've done this before, not in the same area of life or situation. But I've been through hard things. I can do this.” Celebrate your success Unfortunately, people don't celebrate their successes. They don't acknowledge any milestones or achievements, and they just barrel past to the next goal. I'll tell you, you're missing this crucial step. Celebrating is such a crucial step. That's why we have a launch party every time we do a collaborative book. Now, the first time we had a launch party, both in British Columbia and in Ontario, because the majority of the authors were there, and then with COVID, we started to do virtual book launch parties. The reason why we continue to do virtual is because our authors are from all over the place. It makes more sense because we can't bring everyone together and I want everyone to be celebrated by having a virtual party, not just a book launch, but a party! (Sidenote: Doors are open for authors for Leadership Secrets, the fourth book in the Dynamic Women Secret series.) What I found with the launch parties is that is when people actually felt like an author. That's when they stepped into that place of, “Whoa, I actually did this. I wrote something, and I put out a book.” Even if they're not the ones who published the book, and they didn’t layout the book, or edit it, and all that stuff because we do all that: they felt so great as an author. They got to feel like authors, and that exact moment they held the book was super powerful. But the moment they were honoured at a party, that's when they really got to step into being the author. If you want to feel that next level of success, that additional title, that credibility, that expert status, you need to celebrate that moment. The holding of the book was one moment for people to celebrate, but the next was publicly being honoured. For you, what I hope is that you look at the moments where you've done well and write down what you learned. Ask yourself these questions:
You can use my Dynamic Year Journal. It prompts you every week to record your achievements and lessons learned, as well as a bunch of other things that will help you have the most dynamic year. But this is crucial. Celebrating is crucial for you to move forward faster. I've mentioned confidence, self-efficacy, self-esteem, and the ability to persevere to the next goal, but also to achieve more faster because in that celebration piece, when you claim that title, you claim what you have accomplished, and you move yourself to that next level. This is crucial. It is crucial for your growth and for you to reach more goals to maximize the time that you do have. I'd love for you to be part of the next book. We will celebrate you and honour you with a book launch party, and we will have a lot of fun in the process. This week, look at how you can celebrate something you've achieved in any area of life. Read my other blogs:
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