Wouldn’t it be great if there really was such thing as an ‘easy’ button? I think a whole lot more people would be running their own business, because starting a business can be a scary time. Your confidence is low and questions are repeating in your head...
Feeling that fear or lack of confidence means you care about your success. A bigger problem, one that I would call the #1 Business Killer, is self-doubt. Self-doubt is slightly different, and manifests in subtle ways that slowly help you to sabotage yourself out of business. There have been plenty of times when I came close to this very thing, and so I learned a nifty way to stop self-doubt in its tracks. Think of it like the business ABCs – with no ‘D’!
A – Action: Do one small achievable action that will get you closer to your goal and those great ideas. By acting you’ll feel the progress and build your confidence.
B – Brag: Know what you’re good at and the value you offer so when you go into deal talks or anything regarding money you know your worth and ask for it.
C – Coaching: Having the support of your coach will give you the confidence to do things, will keep you accountable and will cheer you on (or kick your butt) towards what you really want helping you increase your money, progress and time!
Let’s take a look at how self-doubt manifests and how the ABCs could apply to the 3 most common concerns when starting a business: money, progress, and time!
Self-doubt looks like: You lose money when you’re not going for those clients, those customers or that big project. You cave when you wanted to ask for the bigger sale. You take lower rates for your services and you constantly undervalue yourself reducing your profit.
A – Action: Ask previous clients or even friends about what you had done for them and the value you offer. By getting testimonials you’re results will speak for you and build your confidence.
B – Brag: Create your own list the top 10 results your clients have. Then read it over often and make sure it’s on your promotional material and website.
C – Coaching: Your coach will empower you to feel confident to ask for what you’re worth by getting to the heart of why you devalue yourself. Then they’ll hold you accountability when you go into meetings, so you don’t cut your prices. Here is your coaching question: What is it costing me to not receive what I’m worth?
Self-doubt looks like: You don’t follow-up with others you feel are above you and end up missing out on networking, referral and affiliate opportunities. You don’t do things that others haven’t done, so you don’t stand out. You don’t put new products or services into play or take a chance on your latest great idea so you stay in the same place. No process means limited success.
A – Action: Make a list of people who you’d like to get to know or do business with. Then pick one a day and contact them.
B – Brag: Speak up about your great ideas. Whether for your business, a community group or your family being heard builds confidence especially when they pick your idea.
C – Coaching: Having a coach to bounce ideas off of can help to get you clear about which ones you want to pursue and which ones you want to put on the back burner. By creating a plan you’ll have a clear picture of where you are going and by committing to action you will make progress. Here is your coaching question: Where do I get held back?
Self-doubt looks like: You’re spreading yourself too thin and being everything to everyone and end up being too busy. By lacking the ability to say “no” to others or speak up for yourself it’s costing you time to work on things that matter most and time to be with those you love the most.
A – Action: Make a list of all the things you’re doing in every area of life. Then make a list of all the things you’d love to do if you had more hours in the day.
B – Brag: Look at your list of responsibilities and figure which ones are not worth your energy and time anymore by asking yourself: Do I love this activity? Do I need it and do I want it? If the answer is no to all three – cut it out!
C – Coaching: Your coach can help you to look at your priorities, what you’re missing out on and help you to choose where to spend your time and how to be more focused and efficient with it. Here’s an important coaching question for your happiness: What do I want to say, “yes” to in my life? Example, vacation, exercise, movie nights, date nights etc.
Want some support around learning the Business ABCs without the ‘D’? I’m giving away a coaching session to one of my peeps! Share in the comments where your self-doubt creeps in and what you want to have more of: money, progress and/or time.
P.S. If you found this valuable please share it with someone else.
It’s not everyday that an airline magazine makes you think, “What kind of seeker am I?”
On my latest trip back from California, the airline magazine Sunseeker, caught my eye and got me thinking; I was a challenge seeker for years, but looking at that magazine in that moment, I realized I’ve changed. And that makes me curious, what kind of seeker are you?
What are you seeking? What are you looking to bring into your life?
I asked my friend Michelle, who was sitting beside me as I wrote this, and she said she's a ‘fun seeker’ and that is why she’s an entrepreneur. Starting new businesses is her way of satisfying her need for fun.
What do you seek? And do you have it in your life right now?
Sit with that for a moment and really answer it.
What did you come up with?
Yep, this is where I have moved, from challenge seeker to freedom seeker.
Before, I liked to feel the rush of the deadline, the pressure of the challenge and the feeling of relief when the challenge was all over. And now, after five days in California with like-minded entrepreneurs, I want freedom. Freedom to go learn from the best where ever they may be, to escape the Canadian cold and sit by a pool, to have the financial means to stay in a nice hotel and work on my iPad.
But more than all of this, it's the freedom in my personal life to spend more time with my family and friends, and to have more fun. To have more choice over what and when I do things. With the life of the entrepreneur, that should have been my reward, but I got caught up in seeking other things: success, achievement and challenge, which took me away from my true priorities of freedom and family.
I would love to hear from you in the comments below: what kind of seeker are you, and what is one thing you can do to seek out the thing you want most in your life right now?
Me? I’m developing my online programs so I have the freedom to deliver them from any place and to anyone. That’s freedom!
P.S. You have permission to make a change (even if it’s drastically different to what you’re doing now). Join me in truly going for what you want. Seek it out and make it a part of your everyday life.
Last week I shared how I was grateful to have the right to work or not and to have some equality in that as well (yep we still have a little ways to go). There were many men and women who paved the path so that we would have more choices and time to do what we like. It’s exciting as a mother to think that my little one could also make a difference in the world with women’s rights or in another area. I guess I’ll have to wait and see.
But what about us? I’m talking about you, me, your friends, family, co-workers, all of us. Maybe we aren’t in government (making big policy decisions) or in a big trailblazing company. But on an individual level we can also make a big DAILY difference in choosing how we act and interact with others. It’s actually pretty simple…and pretty powerful.
How we can make a huge difference in the world for everyone
1. How we ACT: Will you LEAD your life with the feeling that you’re equal?
I see this in my clients all the time: lack of confidence, feeling unworthy, lacking self-belief and like we don’t measure up. Well I’m taking a stand for that. It’s so easy for others to take away our power (rights) when we take them away from ourselves. I’m not saying we need to walk around full of hot air, but just confident that we are equals to all. We deserve great success. We are worthy of happiness. We can believe in ourselves because we are enough.
Having trouble with this? I challenge you to make a list of 100 things that make you AWESOME. Yep, awesome! Not good or even great, but awesome.
Because when we stand in our own worth, we will then stand up for ourselves and others.
2. How we INTERACT: Will you LEAD your life with the feeling that everyone is equal?
We can be quick to feel that someone is better than us (yes some people have more money, a higher position and obviously more of (fill in the blank). And on the flip side that some people are below us (maybe those who act out of hate or don’t put any effort in at all). But the truth is we can serve ourselves and others better when we believe in everyone’s equal right to feel satisfied with life.
How do you apply this? When going into a room of people, or a meeting (basically into a space where you are interacting with others) check in on your feelings before you go in. Ask how you feel about this person (or these people). A typical answer might be “they’re better than me.” Or your ego might take over and answer, “I’m going to show them a thing or two because of my position/success.” Check those at the door and try this thought instead, “We all have the equal right to feel satisfied in our lives. I want to find out what makes people happy.” Create your own ‘check in’ statement that works for you.
So much of the connecting I experience is about one-upmanship/dismissal or giving in and being walked all over.
We want to avoid putting blocks in front of ourselves when others worked so hard to remove them in the past.
While we probably won’t be recognized in history or government for the changes we can choose how to lead our lives, and how we lead within our lives.
Will you LEAD?
Let’s help LEADING catch on like fi-yah! Share how you lead, or recognize how someone else leads and celebrate what they’ve done.
I'll never be just a woman. Yep! I'm grateful for the reasons why.
On Saturday March 8th people around the world celebrated International Women’s Day. This day has brought out my extreme gratitude that I can be more than just a woman. I can also be an entrepreneur, a boss, an employee, a voter, an inventor, a CEO, a politician , a famous Canadian, and all the while being a mother and wife.
I will always be a woman just like the women before me and here is my gratitude for having permission to be SO MUCH MORE!
1. Gratitude to those ahead of us that didn’t stand by and let women be considered less than equal.
2. Gratitude to those ladies who by their inventions proved women are brilliant.
3. Gratitude to those women who stepped into roles of power in the government to not only give women a voice, but to make an impact from the front lines.
4. Gratitude to those women who started their own companies and proved woman can run profitable businesses too!
5. Gratitude for those first women who stepped out of the home and went to work because they probably risked things in their own lives like their marriage and society’s belief in what a “good house wife” did.
BONUS: Gratitude to my Mom who constantly believes I can do whatever I set my mind to, that I have the gifts to achieve greatness and that as long as I do my best I can be proud.
Which of these did you agree with the most? I know 5 points of gratitude probably doesn’t cover them all – so comment below. I’d love to hear if you have gratitude for someone or something different.
P.S. Want to see more inspiration for all those wonderful people out there who have changed or impacted developments on women in the workforce? Watch the video below.
Last year I worked too hard. Not because I was told to, definitely not because I was forced to, but because I was the worst boss ever.
How did I finally realize this? Another women told me!
Imagine me bumping into a mommy friend who I haven’t seen since those lovely maternity days (and yes even with a new born I was still working, but I spent a lot more time getting to be a mom.)
She says, “Wow you’re busy. I see you all over Facebook
with your coaching, DWA meetup, and your workshops,
along with other places.”
And so we chatted about the things I was working on, I heard how she was doing and got updated on the progress of her kids (she has two.) She told me I should be proud of myself. (That comment in itself could be an entire blog post on the impact of a positive acknowledgment).
I thanked her and said that this year I was focusing on getting my programs online so I could reach more people internationally. I wanted to streamline and spend more time with my family because I worked too much last year.
Her response, “Well, don’t you work for yourself?”
Well smack me over the face! I do! Hahaha! She was so right! I do work for myself and I work myself hard!
I LOVE what I do! I really do.
With the drive I have for my work and the passion I have for the people I serve, I feel like I want to work…A LOT. But it’s a thing of the past; I’m changing.
Well, the hard work gave me success, got me established, achieved great results for my clients, and gave me great nourishment. But it also cost me some things. We can only sprint for so long.
I want to live the width of my life as well as the length of it. (Something I just spoke about in January to a group of mompreneurs).
Now I have a different set of goals; ones that focus on the process of life over the results.
Maybe in a part of your life you need to be a better boss to yourself. Or maybe you just need a friend who points out things you’ve been blindly ignoring. I’m curious, what would they say to you?
P.S. I’m thinking that I’m not the only one who works themselves hard. Please tell me I'm not alone.
P.P.S. Inspire me and other entrepreneurs with how you are going to be a better boss to yourself.
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