When you experience something that you didn’t expect you may have the emotion of SURPRISE.
Life is full of many surprises. When you feel surprised you can have a reaction that is positive or negative depending on how you view and it’s impact on you.
Can you think of when this would be the case?
Now the feeling of a positive or a negative surprise is also linked to how well you can react to the surprise.
Would you feel ready for a surprise in your life?
I have felt this when I got my first speaking gig out of the blue. Also when a client ended group coaching to work 1:1 with me. When a couple of my mommy friends moved away and when my husband got a new job.
In any situation that is a surprise you might not know how to “be” or what to “do” in each one. So what do you do?
3 Steps to Embrace Change
1. Figure it Out
Even if you feel like you can’t do what you are surprised with – figure it out! That speaking opportunity seems tough because you can’t get up in front of people, you can’t teach it because you won’t say the right thing, or you’ll blow that date because you won’t wear the right clothes. Don’t worry you have brains and you’re capable to figure it out!
When Adriel and I were dating in Ontario he said that he wanted to move to BC I was surprised and moving out here I didn’t know what to expect. We packed up his car, with no job to start at, no place to live and no friends or family here we figured it out. Any good opportunity or surprise also takes trust. Now we’re married with two kids, a house, he has a great job and I have a business, so it all worked out.
2. Design Processes
I didn’t know the processes that went along each of my surprises, but the cool thing is that like any situation once you’ve been in it you can learn from it. Did you somehow upsell a customer? Did you earn a referral? Did you work some magic? Then document what you did and create a system or process and replicate it!
3. Build Confidence
The benefit is that the more surprises you have the more confident you’ll become to accept a surprise that could be an opportunity or even a challenge.
I have a quote for you from Henry Ford,
“One of the greatest discoveries a man makes, one of his greatest surprises,
is to find he can do what he was afraid he couldn't”
My goal for you is to surprise yourself in your ability.
Be open to surprises - If we are so focused on what we want and where we are going we may miss out on life’s surprises. Imagine how life would be, same old, boring. Think about how you can bring surprise into your life a little more by trying new foods, going to new places and be more spontaneous to take on new things and challenges.
P.S. Do you have some great ideas? Then please share…
What can you do today to surprise yourself? AND how can someone bring the gift of surprise into a friends or family member’s life?
photo credit: <a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/47352911@N02/5392447871">Aaargh!</a> via <a
It’s super cool when a client asks me a question. So the last of my ASK Me ANYTHING question series is today. Sue Woolley asks, How do you stay so positive and passionate!?
It’s easy to stay passionate and positive when you’re doing what you love. That could sound like such a cheesy answer, but so many happy people say the same thing. Honestly it’s a lot easier to be passionate and positive when life is supporting you rather than throwing you curve balls or sad situations.
#InnerTruth - my life is not perfect all the time. I just choose to be passionate and positive in spite of it.
Since there are many times when I’m not feeling so passionate or positive and I thought it might be more beneficial to speak to that.
So let’s draw back the curtain.
3 Times I don’t feel so Positive or Passionate!
1. I’m around sucky people:
Negative people can suck the life out of you. I know that when I’m around “can’t do” people or “life sucks” people it’s hard for me to feel positive. Sometimes they are referred to emotional vampires.
Part of my job is to coach people through difficult life situations that they either chose or are were on the receiving end of, but the difference is that they are looking to make a change rather than wallow in it.
I have to be clear in saying that expressing about a difficult situation, clearing the feelings of a bad experience or saying you’re stuck is very different from being a sucky person.
If you have negative people in your life you may want to rethink the relationship and get honest with them and help them move forward or if nothing changes then cut ties or at least reduce your exposer to them before they suck you dry.
2. My values are being dishonored:
This can happen because you are doing it to yourself, for example, if hard work is a value and then you have been checking (playing on) Facebook rather than working on an urgent project you’re going to feel pretty crappy.
The other way is someone doing it to you. If you’re not feeling great at any moment or even more you’re ticked or annoyed with something or someone ask yourself why. You might have just had your values dishonoured.
I run a women’s community called Dynamic Women in Action and when people say they’re coming and they don’t show I feel negativity brewing inside of me because commitment, trust and giving my word are huge values of mine. It’s in those moments you may be like me and need to self-manage and you can do that by focusing on where you are honoring your values.
3. I’m stuck:
Feeling stuck or that obstacles are in your way is often a way that you can lose momentum and then positivity. It’s hard to be all chipper if you can’t make progress on something. For example, the scale has stopped, but you’re still eating healthfully, you don’t know how to do the next step of a project or you’re waiting on someone’s reply.
I often get stuck trying to figure something out or I lose momentum and feel like blocks are being placed before me.
Ask yourself what “can” be done, ask for help and allow yourself to take a break are all good ways to not get overthrown by the negativity. In my experience when you get moving again the motivation and happy sauce will return.You should never be expected to be fake positive in any area of life. Of course we often have to put our best selves forward depending on the situation, but having people to listen to your feelings, thoughts and struggles can help a lot. Make sure you have an outlet so you can be your best self.
3 ways to be more Positive and Passionate
These are 3 of the top ways I stay passionate and positive, but I have a lot more and everyone is different, so I'd love to hear from you!
How do you stay passionate and positive? Dancing to music? Walking your dog?
Let me know!
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