Last week we looked at the assets we have in our life or business that we can use to reach expert status or be #1 in what we do. That’s just one part of how using your #1 or expert status to grow your business. You also need to show up with the right attitude and mindset!

Today, we’re going to look at how being unforgettable can help you boost your business. This starts with getting clarity around your point of view.

What’s Your Point of View?
Let’s say you own a dog food company. What is your point of view about dog food? 
I'm sure you've seen the commercials where they compare two brands of dog food: the cheaper brand in a larger “Costco-sized” bag and the smaller more expensive bag with higher quality ingredients. One advertiser’s point of view is that dog food should only contain high-quality ingredients that a human would eat. The other food company believes the convenience of buying larger bags for cheaper is more important. One believes our pets’ needs are more important than their owners, and the other believes the opposite. 

I won’t get into the debate over who is right. That’s not why I brought up this example. It’s just to illustrate distinct points of view. 

Making Your Point of View Memorable

The question you need to ask yourself is, “Is your point of view is important and memorable enough that magazines, newspapers, radio, and bloggers would pick up your story?” 

When you share your point of view with the world, are you using words that everyone else is using? On one hand, using the same words is great because you know it’s something people are already searching for in your niche, but what can you add to your messaging and point of view to be memorable?

For example, everyone “universally” believes that “Goal setting is good”. If I was being interviewed about goal setting and I just regurgitated what other experts said, without adding my own spin or point of view, would that make me memorable? Nope!

Instead, what if I said, “Having goals is a waste of time”? You might hear me and think, “Oh, why are you saying that Diane?  You’re a coach and you should know better!”

I said something that made you curious. If that was a title of a blog or a podcast, you'd be like, “Yeah right! Then prove it Diane!” I would then need to back-up my point of view. 

This unique perspective made people stop and think. That's more interesting. It's more memorable than saying the exact same thing as someone else.

What if I said, “Having success in life is not important?” Hmm… if you heard this come out of my mouth you’d probably wonder, “What? So, what is important then?”

 Even Be Memorable as an Interviewer
 Let’s relate this back to being #1. You need to be memorable to be #1. When you go into an interview, or when you're doing your social media content, this is where you can stand out. And even if you're interviewing others, you still need to make sure you stand out in some way. Otherwise you're going to become the invisible host. When we look at people like David Letterman, Jay Leno, Ellen DeGeneres, and Oprah, they are hosts that we remember – because of their unique and often bold perspective. 

The key thing to remember is that even when you are the interviewer, you need to make sure that you stand it with your own unique point of view. This is going to make you a present, non-invisible host that people remember and love. 

Now think back to your life or business. Are you memorable when you attend parties or events? When you’re interviewed somewhere? When people meet you? What is it that they remember about you?

The fact of the matter is that if they don't remember you, they can't do business with you. They can't call you up when they need someone in that industry, because they don't remember you. 

Becoming Memorable

So how can you make yourself memorable? It doesn’t have to be complicated. 

Be Unique in Your First Impression
The first thing you can do is have a solid handshake. Then focus on how you can be magnetic at that event (being magnetic is one of the nine pillars of being a Dynamic Woman). This means that when you meet someone, you say their name back to them. When you say things like, “It’s lovely to meet you,” does your face genuinely light up? How can you be unique in that moment or how can you make them feel like they're the most important person in the world? 

Is it going to be your humor, your kindness, your calming demeanor, the poignant things you’ve said? Are you a great listener or did you say something memorable in the moment? 

This doesn’t mean you have to be an extrovert if that’s not who you are. It doesn't mean you need to be the smartest or most powerful person in the room. It just means that you look for ways to make others feel special in the moment. 

What makes you memorable could be something about your wardrobe or hair? Maybe your business card is unique? This is so important because you want them to think of you when they need your product or service.  You also want them to think of you when someone they know is asking for your product or service. And when they think of your industry, they think of you because you are the best. You are number one.

Use the Word “THE”
Want another easy thing you can do to be memorable? No matter what industry you're in, no matter if you have a product or service. Start using the word “THE” before you introduce what you’re an expert in. 

Now you're not going to say you are “the expert at sales” because that kind of sounds like you’re claiming to be best in the world at this (which you may not actually be). Instead, make it a little more specific. For example, if sales is your expertise, be more specific about the type of sales: online sales, direct sales, sales to groups, high end sales, or home sales. Pick one and just add “the expert at” to the beginning. 

Now, obviously you should do it with integrity, so if you say you are the best at something, you need to be able to back this up with examples, results, or testimonials. When you make it specific to your unique talent or your unique skill, you will stand out and be memorable. And when you stand out people know how to buy from you and you are top of mind for opportunities. 

If you don’t have any way to back up a #1 or “best at” claim (you haven’t won any awards or recognition), you could say things like “one of the leading…” or “one of the best…” 

Alternatively, you could say “I do [this] in my business” or “I do [insert product/service here].” 

For example..

Hi, I’m Diane Rolston and I’m “the expert at helping women to be dynamic” or I’m “the expert at leading a dynamic life.” How do I know this? I am coach, an author, a podcaster, speaker, and I lead a women's community. All these things are under the theme of being a dynamic woman, the theme of leading a dynamic life, the theme of empowering women to be dynamic, so I can say that I’m an expert at it and still be in integrity.

So what are you an expert at?
Use your expertise to be memorable and have a specific point of view, so that you stand out and use your assets to help you attain all of this.

​At the end of the day, this works no matter where you are in your business journey: whether you're just starting out, looking to scale, planning to sell, or seeking for a promotion at work. It’s important to move ahead in a way that's highly successful. 
Now get out there and make yourself memorable! 

What makes you #1? What are you the best at? 

Think about your work, career, or business. 

• Are you a #1 real estate agent? 
• Are you #1 in customer service? 
• Are you #1 in your niche? 
• Are you #1 on your team? 
• Are you #1 in customer service? 
• Are you #1 in sales? 
• Are you #1 in your sense of humor? 
• Are you #1 in creativity or problem solving? 

Think about at home. Perhaps #1 in baking? What about #1 in dog grooming? Or maybe #1 in gardening? 

You can be #1 in anything you excel at, that you’re the best at, or that you’re a high achiever in. 

How to Stay At #1
Today I’m going to share with you how you can stay “on top” in whatever achievement or skill you have. Whether you want a successful business, to be the best in your area of expertise, or even #1 in your health, knowing how to get to the top and how to stay there is important.

Part of this is learning how to work smarter, not harder. It’s also about getting clarity on your biggest assets and knowing how to use it to be memorable and implement a plan to stand out and design the best way to attract those you want to work with. 

So, for the sake of focus, pick one thing that you are (or you want to be) #1 at. Got it? Great, now keep reading to learn how to reach #1 by using your ASSETS! 

Identify Your Assets

Think about your biggest asset. I'm not talking about your house, or your car, or a boat, or a big bank account. In this case, I mean an asset that can you can utilize to help you become #1. 

If you wanted to be #1 in something business or career related, maybe your asset is your large email list. Maybe it’s a product? Is it an ability or skill? Is it your network? Your employees? Maybe you have another asset. Identify these and pick your biggest one or two. 

While doing this exercise it’s possible you’ll discover that your asset is the thing that sets you apart from your competitors and helps you get ahead. 

Now, think about your top asset and ask yourself, “How can I optimize this to reach #1?” For example, if you said your extensive business network was your asset, how can you use your network to help you to step forward? 

Well, you can use it to reach more people. Can you have people on social media support you, tag you, share your posts, invite their people to your events, invite them to your open houses, to product launches, to your store? For sure!

If your asset is your amazing product and strong list, can you offer referrals to your contacts? Can you use your assets to engage your audience more?

I challenge you for the next week to think about your assets and how they serve you. Which ones do you think are your most powerful assets that you can use to increase your authority or expertise? 

Next week, we’re going to look at how to develop your unique and memorable point of view to show the world you are #1. 
​
Until then, stay dynamic!

Last week we started talking about what you should be doing to get the most out of your mentorship relationship. Today, I’m sharing last 2 things you should ask from your mentor: 

1. Making Connections 

The next thing that you should look for from a mentor is connections. Your mentor maybe able to open doors to people you couldn’t have opened yourself. They could make that very important recommendation or introduction to these connections 

Look at your mentor’s connections on LinkedIn and see if those are people you should be connected with. Check their other social media accounts too to see who they are already networking with.  

A recent colleague of mine recently connected with somebody that I really, really want to do business with. I’m going to keep this in mind and when the time is right, I'll be asking them for an introduction. 

Most mentors would be happy to make these connections for you, as long as it’s the right time and for the right reasons. Don't ask for these referrals on the first date with your mentor. Build the relationship with your mentor so they really get to know and trust you. 

Connections are huge and you NEED to earn that trust. Perhaps your first step could be to ask your mentor about this person and what they’re like. They might even turn around and say, “You know what? Let me introduce you to them right now.”  

You will most often need to earn this trust first by showing up to your mentor sessions on time, doing what you say you'll do, sending the agendas in, implementing what you've talked about, having that positive attitude and living according to your values. Then they'll be happy to introduce you to their connections. 

2. Asking for Stories  

When your mentor shares a strategy or point of view, ask them for a story that relates to the topic. Stories will help the idea or strategy sink in better for you and will really help you to see how to implement what they're talking about. Stories help make the strategy or idea more tangible or real.  

A colleague of mine was sharing a point of view and told me a story about a conversation she had with Richard Branson on Necker Island! That helped create a picture in my mind and to really comprehend the point she was making.  

Don't be afraid to ask, “Hey, did that actually happen to you?” or “Do you have a story that could explain that?”  

Or when you first meet with mentor, ask if they can share some stories! Of course, some stories they can't share based on confidentiality with their clients or their business. You could say, “I’d love to hear stories of how these things have affected you, how they've influenced you, or how you've done certain things.”  

Ask for stories to back up the points that they're making. And when you have a great mentor that tells great stories, oh my goodness, those things are going to stick in you!  


So…now what? 

If you don't already have a mentor, a coach, a consultant, someone that you can go to for advice or support, I suggest you go find one. You could start by browsing my website to see if our values align. If they do, let’s have a conversation about me being your mentor or coach.  

No matter who you choose, find a mentor who inspires you and when you get started, show up looking to also inspire them. Have a very clear agenda of questions and topics you need advice on. Accept their strategies and be open to different points of view. Build that trust so they'll open up their Rolodex to you when you need it. And ask them to share their stories with you! Doing these five things will help get the most out of any mentorship in your life. 

If you already have a mentor, think about these five things and ask yourself, “Am I really getting the best value from this mentorship opportunity? What do I need to do differently to get more out of it?” 

A mentor can help you up-level any or all areas of your life! It is never too late or early to have someone in your life. 

Do you have a mentor? Let me rephrase that…Do you have a GREAT mentor? The mentor-mentee relationship can provide you with so many great benefits, if you find the right person, and are dedicated to getting the most out of the opportunity.  

But there lies the challenge. What should you look for in a mentor to make sure you’re getting the value you need from the relationship? 

Who can be a mentor? 

In a traditional sense, many mentors are actually volunteers. They are just supporting you and helping you and are NOT there to give away all their ideas and knowledge.  

A mentor is there to help and guide you through whatever you're going through. 

Your mentor could be a networking colleague, someone from a mastermind group, or even a cool aunt, a neighbour, or other person in your life who is doing really well in life or business.  

There are also opportunities for paid mentorship where you pay to connect with someone. These people may call themselves consultants, coaches, or can be someone referred from a mentoring agency or organization.  

So a “mentor” can come in the form of a colleague, coach, consultant, or advisor, as long as you define the relationship.  

Here are the first three of five things you should be doing or considering in any mentorship arrangement:   

1. Getting Inspired

Look for a mentor who can inspire you. We’re often siloed in our business or life. In our own little box, our own tiny fish bowl, under our own glass ceiling with own limiting beliefs and boundaries. 

You should be inspired every time you talk to your mentor. When you’re inspired, you're often more motivated to go for the things you want. When you're inspired, you can get more done. You get into action faster and then to stay dedicated to that action.  

Being inspired by a mentor, helps you get into resonance and resonance is energy flow.  

On the flip side, your mentor should also be inspired by you! You may think, “Well, what could I teach them?” It's not about teaching. It's about showing up with positive energy, Gusto, with a can-do attitude and then actually doing the stuff and implementing it. 

Your mentor can be inspired by your hustle or your positivity. Think about how you can inspire them. Just ask yourself, “How can I get inspired by them and how can I inspire them as well?”  

Also look to be inspired, and learn, from their strategies! Great mentors share great strategies, helping you to strategize about whatever it is you’re struggling with or wanting to accomplish.  

Mentors should be ahead of you in some way. Even if they are in a different industry, their experience can help you figure out a plan. To get the most value from your relationship, make sure you come prepared to every meeting…which is #2 below: 

2. Creating Agendas 

Come prepared to every mentor meeting with an agenda that includes the things that you are wanting to learn or get mentoring on.  

Give your mentor your agenda in advance so that they can pre-think on the topics that you want to talk about. I do this with my clients. They send me a prep form before each session with everything they want to work on together. Then I know where they want to go, so I can help provide clarity and insight on exactly what they need.  

In your agenda, be clear about the type of support you want and then use that word, ask them specifically, “Can you help me brainstorm ideas/give me feedback/choose the best option/see if I’m missing anything?” 

Ask to strategize together. Strategize is another word for brainstorming. When you're open to talking through different strategies, you might find the one that works for you. 

3. Being Open to Different Points of View  

Everyone has their own unique set of experiences and knowledge, which leads to a unique point of view. We’re often in that fishbowl and don’t stop to consider, or even know, there are other ways to look at a situation because we are so consumed by the moment and our personal experience. This is often referred to as having limiting beliefs.  

Being open to different points of view can create a perspective shift, which can help you break past barriers or obstacles. A new perspective you may never have thought of on your own, but one that comes from your mentor and their view of the world can be HUGE for you! 

It could help you to make a quicker decision on something, help motivate you, or help you make more money.  

Make sure you choose a mentor whose values are in alignment with yours. This way, when they share their perspectives with you, they are more likely to be in align with your values too.  


Next week I’ll share the last 2 things you should be asking of your mentor.  

When we overthink we can’t sleep. Then we experience more self-doubt or we get into a kind of paralysis where we’re not present anymore for the ones we love.
 
Last week we talked about overthinking, and what the studies (and our Dynamic Women® community) say about how long we should spend in focused decision-making time. Now let’s talk a bit about some ways to help us stop overthinking.
 
Here are a few ways you can encourage yourself to make the decision faster:
 

• Choose the decision that would make the most difference: Think back to last week when I asked you to think of a decision you’ve been procrastinating on or overthinking. What’s one thing that if you made a decision on right now, would make your life so much better?
• Schedule thinking time: Imagine if you took your schedule and you wrote in it, “Make a decision on X, Y or Z” in a slot on your calendar. This would give you scheduled, dedicated time to make that decision.
• Look at the bigger picture: Ask yourself if this will matter in five years or even in five weeks from now? So, whether you picked the Cobb salad or the Sushi doesn't really matter in five weeks. It doesn't matter in five hours (well unless it makes you sick, but let’s put it in perspective).
• Go with the right decision for right now: Ask yourself, if you’re truly supposed to answer this question now or is there a simpler question that I need to ask myself before making my decision. So thinking back to the moving homes example, before deciding that you were for sure going to move, maybe you needed to first decide what city to move to or what type of house you wanted to buy.
• Just do it: An interesting strategy suggested at a Dynamic Women® event was to, “Just do it”. Just tell yourself to make the decision and it will help get the ball rolling.
• Brainstorming time: Brainstorming will help you to create a plan of action. At least the first step.
• Look at what will happen if you don’t make the decision: Take a quick moment to consider the consequences of indecision. Perhaps your decision will be made for you? Maybe your options will be further limited?

Here comes what my clients call a “Diane-ism!” Everything is figureoutable! (And how timely that it’s even in Marie Forleo’s latest book.)

It is the truth! You can figure this out. Keep focusing on active problem solving. Don't dwell on the problem. Don't dwell on the fact that you can't make a decision on this. Ask yourself, what steps can I take? What 
can I do next to move me forward? Is this really the first question I need to be asking myself? 

If right now truly isn’t the right time to make this decision, get some exercise. Go for a walk and be in nature or sleep on it. Know that everything is figureoutable and that you will be able to make a good decision. And if fear comes in, ask yourself if this will matter in five years or even five weeks. 

Overthinking it takes your time. It takes your money. It takes convenience. It takes away balance and it gives you so many negative things. So why did we do it?

I implore you, don't do it anymore. Focus on the decision making and make small decisions as quickly as possible. 

What is this is going to do? It's going to build your decision-making muscle. I mean, what's the worst that can happen from a bad decision? You're going to learn from it and you're going to know what decision to make the next time. 

Don't take yourself so seriously. Get out there and make some decisions! 

And I'd love to hear how this article has impacted you in your decision making and how you have made an awesome dynamic decision. 

Are you a quick decision maker, or do you ponder a bit too long and overthink it?
This year for my 40th, I really want to have a big fun birthday, like going away to a beach somewhere so I put it out there in the universe. A friend ended up inviting me to Maui with her and a couple of her friends to celebrate her birthday. This was about four months before my own birthday. I thought about it quite a bit. I ended up humming and hawing.

Eventually I said to my husband, “Um, what do you think? All I'd have to cover is my flight. And my friends would be splitting the food, drinks, and the car.” 

In retrospect it seemed like a pretty awesome deal and a great opportunity, right? 
Yet, I couldn't say yes, but I also couldn't say no. I was overthinking it. 
​
It wasn’t until my husband said, “You know, why not go for it? Why aren't you doing this? You can take the time off. It's obviously a fun trip to have. So just go.” 

I ended up going on the trip, but what did it cost me to overthink that decision? By the time I said yes, they had already booked their flights and when I went to book the same flights it cost me more money. A substantial amount more! I started overthinking again and when I went to book later in the day, guess what happened? 

It not only cost me more money, but also robbed me of some vacation time. The only flight I could book got me to our condo after everyone was in bed. I missed out on the first night of fun. I also lost out on the convenience of sharing a car together (I had to take a shuttle, alone). 

The trip was fantastic and I’m glad I made that decision, and even though it had a positive outcome, overthinking still cost me so much!

Why do we overthink?

​What makes us overthink? Well, we have our schedules, goals, priorities, and important decisions to make every single day, every moment, right? 

As you may already know, I have 2 kids and a business. There's always something to make a decision about in my life.

It's gotten pretty natural for busy women like us, but this tendency to overthink can totally hinder your progress. Perfectionism and procrastination are the two negative results of overthinking. I’ve heard women also say it makes them feel overwhelmed and paralyzed. Have you heard the expression “paralysis by analysis?” 

What are some things that you overthink? Is it something about your kids? Is it related to life balance? What's for dinner? Big decisions like deciding if you should move or change jobs? Maybe you overthink about doing your taxes? Do you overthink marketing if you have a business? And do you overthink your choice of ice-cream? 

Oh man, all of this overthinking takes up time! 

What does overthinking actually do to you and others? Because we're doing it all the time, we obviously don't feel the pain or consequences strong enough. 

Maybe you didn’t sleep last night. You laid awake most of the night because your brain wouldn’t shut off, thinking over every decision you made yesterday and thinking of every decision you need to make the next day. 

The next morning, you went for coffee with a friend and were physically there with them, but your brain was overthinking a decision, or just not thinking clearly because you are lacking sleep. 

How long SHOULD you spend making decisions?
After this whole situation with my Maui trip, my curious mind wondered how long it should take a person to make a decision. How long for small decisions? Like what are you going to have for dinner, what you’re going to order at the restaurant, what to wear today. Then what about more potentially life-changing decisions like, do I quit my job? Is it the right time to have children?

I did a bit of research and what I found was that small decisions should take you about 30 seconds and then the big decisions should take about 30 minutes. But, when I asked my community of Dynamic Women® at our live events, what I found was the answers range from a few hours to a few days, to a few weeks, to a few months to make those big decisions. They said the smaller decisions can be made in seconds, minutes, or even longer.

What is focused decision-making time?

Now you may be thinking, how can someone make a big decision, like what house to pick, in under 30 minutes? 

Well, my research is referring to something called, Focused Decision-Making Time. Some actual, dedicated time you take to make your decision.

How does focused decision making work for small decisions? Let’s say you’re trying to pick your meal at a restaurant. You look and see the yummy sushi on page one, then you see a yummy chicken dish, and also a Cobb salad. You’ve now narrowed your choices to three. If you really focus on it (maybe even set a 30 second timer) it seems likely that you can make your choice without overthinking it. 

Now, let's look at a bigger decision like buying a house. At this point, you've probably already seen a lot of houses. You can see what's good and what's bad about each home, even considering the price point, the neighborhood, and how much work you're going to have to do on it. You narrow your potential new homes to about three to four. What if you set a timer for 30 minutes. When that timer goes off, do you think you could have your decision? Very possible if it’s dedicated and focused decision-making time.

Focused decision making means you're not doing other things or multi-tasking. You're not letting it percolate. You are not just going about your day. You're actually sitting and looking to have a result of a decision by the end of the time. 

Now you might say “Oh, Diane, I could never do that! It takes me forever to make decisions,” or “I like to honor the space and just kind of sleep on it or let it just sit there. I know that I'm gonna figure it out.” Or “I'll see a sign and so I'm just going to do other things and then come back to it later.” 

In reality, so often when we put decisions like this on the back burner they never actually happen!

Take the Dynamic Women® Podcast, for example.  A few years ago, I decided to wanted to start a podcast. I really wanted it. It wasn't that I was overthinking it, it was more so that I just didn't make the decision to commit to it. I felt other things were more important at the time. So, it's not necessarily that I was overthinking, but I definitely missed out on having it happen. 

What if instead I started that timer? Gave myself three minutes, 30 minutes, 13 minutes, just some specific dedicated time to make a decision and decide a first step. I think I may have started my podcast back then, instead of letting it stew for years before I actually made the decision and commitment to do it.

So, I’ve shared a few stories of the consequences of my indecision and overthinking. What is something you’ve been overthinking lately? 

Next week on the blog we’re going to look at the solutions to overcome what you may be overthinking right now and in the future. 

We’ve talked recently about identifying good and bad habits and replacing bad habits with new ones that serve you. Now we need to look at how to use these habits to reach your goals.  

What are your goals in life? Do you want to get back to working out? Do you want to start sleeping eight hours a day? Do you want to get up early? Do you want to up-level your business? Do you want to attract more clients? Do you want to have a stronger marriage, a better relationship with a family member or a friend?  

What is a goal that you want to reach? Now look at your current habits and ask yourself, do these support the goals I want to have? 

Your bad habits probably don’t support your goals, and that’s what makes them bad habits. 

Your good habits bring you closer to achieving your goals, and that’s what makes them good habits.  

Using GOOD habits to move you towards your goals 

Now think about what new good habits you need to adopt to bring your closer to your goals. Here are two examples:  

• Do you feel that your schedule is all over the place, you're forgetting things, or you feel overscheduled? Make a habit of planning out your week on Sundays so you can feel more in control throughout the week.  
• Do you find yourself burned out by the end of the day and you lay in bed just mindlessly scrolling through Facebook or “unplugging” in a different way that isn’t very productive? Make a habit of doing a good habit in the evenings to help you feel more relaxed, like just chilling out on the patio, meditating, listening to music, or going for a walk. 
• Do you feel that your digital files are in shambles? Make a habit of downloading files right away and filing them where they belong. Yeah, I get it. Filing sucks, but what if starting today you put files where they belong right away. Do you think that that would help you be a more successful, organized person? Of course! It's going to save you time too!  

Having Successful Habits Will Make You A Successful Person 

Think of someone you consider successful in your life or in the world. You can bet they have established good habits that push them towards reaching their success goals. But, it's up to you to figure out the habits you need to reach your goals.  

That’s my wish for you! Take some time today to go through your list of habits (the good and the bad). If you were to just drop one bad habit. Really consciously put effort into dropping that one bad habit and pick up one good habit that's going to help you achieve your goals, you my friend are going to be a more successful and dynamic woman.  

Congratulations for investing this time in yourself. I know it is going to pay off. If you have some really good habits and ideas that you want to share, please reach out. You can find me at @coachdianerolston on Instagram or comment below with your questions or comments.  

So, until next time, stay dynamic! 

Do you have habits that doesn't serve you anymore? What habits do you want to break?  

Maybe you snack while you watch TV? Do you drink too much? Go to bed late? Do you bite your nails? What are some bad habits that you want to break and do you know how do you break them?  

First, you need to know why are you doing the bad habit in the first place. Are you snacking while you're watching TV because you're bored and your “eating” your emotions?

Are you going to bed late because you're not getting up early enough? Or are you going to bed late because you just have too many things on your plate? Maybe the bad habit really is that you're saying “yes” too much that you're taking too much on. 

To get rid of your bad habits, first look at reason, motivation, or influence for that bad habit? And then ask yourself what's important about breaking this habit?  

If the habit is, for example, snacking too much while watching TV, think about what is so important to you about breaking that? Is it because you want to be healthier? Because you don't want to go to bed with a full stomach? Or because you just end up watching trash on TV anyway. Maybe you want to read more, go to bed earlier, exercise, or do a different habit that is going to actually going support you and help you.  

I had to ask myself that earlier this year when I wasn’t eating well and the reason was I was wanting to eat my emotions around my Dad’s cancer.  I couldn’t do anything to take his cancer away and the chips and donuts helped me to drown my emotions. But this bad habit didn’t support me.  

Find the core reason for your bad habit, a cue that is actually making you do the habit.  

As a mom and a coach, I've talked to my fellow moms and clients, many say that as soon as the kids are in bed, all they want to do is grab a glass of wine. Now I'm not gonna sit here and judge you because I feel it too and I don’t know your reasons for drinking wine. I’ll be honest that I feel the same way too. The back and forth “Just get to bed!” routine with the kids is stressful. Maybe that’s why you reach for a drink, or maybe you have another stress in your life that is your cue and the first thing you want to do is just get a beer or glass of wine just to calm down. Is that really the best habit in that situation, if I am using it to self-soothe?  

Probably there are better habits for self-soothing like meditation, going for a walk, or talking to a friend. 

How to replace bad habits 
Now, what do you do after identifying your trigger? 

Start by replacing that bad habit with a good habit? For example, if you don’t want to go to bed so late, come up with a going-to-bed ritual or routine and get to bed earlier.  

If you're snacking while watching TV instead think “I'm going to go drink a glass of water and grab some veggies.” Or “I'm going to do 10 push-ups.” Or “I’m going to journal.” Find a habit that will actually support you instead.  

Then your next task is to attach this new good habit to another good habit you already have.  

For example, if you’re someone who's feeling like they're constantly being negative, try bringing in the good habit of affirmations or gratitude. If you have already a habit in the morning of making yourself a coffee or tea, attach your new habit to that established habit. Then each time you brew your coffee, think of all things that you are grateful for.  

When you attach a new habit to good established habit that you already have, the good habit becomes your trigger or cue, and it’s a win-win all around.  

Next week, we’ll discuss how to use your newly anchored habits to achieve your goals. 

In the meantime, comment below on some goals you’re going to work on replacing over the next seven days.    

So, until next time, stay dynamic! 

Do you ever look at successful people in wonder? How do they do it?  

Do you want to get ahead in your life, but it seems like hard work and constant struggles?  

Well, there are things that you can do that will help you in leaps and bounds.  

Let’s start by having you look at your good habits because they will help support you in reaching your goals.  

What are “good” habits? 

First, what is a good habit? Good habits are actions you take on a regular basis that are linked to your behaviours, and they benefit your physical and mental health. Good habits are often thought to need a high level of discipline and self-control. But are they? 

Ask yourself, what are some good habits that you have right now? What are things you do daily or often that really are beneficial to you? 

Take a minute, write a few down, or just think of a few. What’s on your list? 

I’ve made a list of really good habits that support my values, beliefs, and goals. Do you share any of these 10?  

1. eating healthy foods  
2. getting enough sleep  
3. getting up early 
4. meditating daily  
5. working out 
6. eating a good breakfast 
7. taking naps  
8. not wasting time 
9. taking breaks to re-energize  
10. showing gratitude 

Now looking at each habit we can see how they are important to us. 

​For example, one of my good habits is I make my bed everyday. What is the importance of that for me? Well I work from home and my office is quite near my bedroom. So, when I go to the bathroom I walk through my bedroom to my en-suite. Can you imagine walking through your room seeing your bed NOT made?  That wouldn’t be the greatest sight, but if it’s made seeing it all neat and tidy, actually feels really good! It’s a little boost for my energy. 

How morning rituals make you successful 

What are some really good habits you have and how do they add to your success?  

Well, if you start your day by doing something great like getting up early, meditating, working out, eating a good breakfast, or like me making your bed, do you think that kicks off your day in the best way? For sure. It totally does! Successful people not only have morning habits but they have a whole morning ritual of habits. 

The morning is a really great place to start having good habits so you start your day off right. This is when you're going to get the most benefit because it fuels the rest of your day! 

Do you like to hit your snooze button when your alarm goes off? Do you wake up and immediately reach for your phone? If you want to break yourself of these bad habits, think about what would be an ideal habit to have in the morning?  

One popular morning ritual I reference in my book Dynamic You is called the Miracle Morning. It’s a book by Hal Elrod created around as series of steps called LifeSAVERS: Silence, Affirmations, Visualization, Exercise, Reading, and Scribing (or journaling). Where you do each for 10 minutes or make your own timing for them. 

Many successful people have other morning routines you can follow, or you can make one that serves you.  

You can also create new and good habits that tie into getting ready for work, starting your day, or getting into different activities that you have. 

This week I challenge you to really look at the good habits you have now, and good habits you want to have because next week I’ll share the secret to how successful women achieve their goals by adding new good habits, and how they replace their bad habits with good ones. 

In the meantime, don’t forget to subscribe and give us a 5-star review on the Dynamic Women Podcast. 

So, until next time, stay dynamic! 

I believe that every woman is dynamic!  

As women we share many commonalities and many differences and it’s the combination of the two that makes us dynamic.  

I have started noticing commonalities among women I consider to be dynamic in my life.  

Based on my observations, I have developed a list of 5 similarities that dynamic women share.  Do you have them all?  

1. Dynamic women encompass many skills and talents 
Dynamic women come from all walks of life. These women come together regardless of age, demographic, likes/dislikes. Together, we create a community that is truly all inclusive so that no woman would feel like, “Oh, that's not me, so I can't be a part of that group.”  

When you embrace your unique set of skills and talents, and be accepting of the talents of others, you can be a truly dynamic woman.  

2. Dynamic women focus on who they are, not what they do  
A dynamic woman focuses on who she is, not her titles, nor what she does, so she shows up as her authentic self. As a coach, I was witnessing the judgment that many of my clients were facing as they often felt defined and judged based on their professional and societal titles. The world was putting them into a pre-sorted box, and it wasn’t fair. This judgement was preventing them from being fully themselves.  

When you start focusing on who you are, not what you do or your titles given to you by society, you can be a truly dynamic woman. 

3. Dynamic women show up 
When they show up, you just know they’re dynamic. You can sense it based on being around them. Not only how you see them from afar, but how you feel when they're near. They're interesting! 

When you show up with a positive outlook and vibe, you can be a truly dynamic woman.  

4. Dynamic women make you feel great 
The way you feel around dynamic women is super awesome. You sometimes feel a connection or just feel like you want to talk to them for the long time. It’s that sensation you feel when in a flowing conversation with them, when you want to know more about them because they're so interesting and there's a positive vibe between the two of you.  

When you show up as your authentic self, others will naturally gravitate to you, and you can be a truly dynamic woman. 

5. Dynamic women embrace change 
You might not really notice, but change is happening everywhere and all around you. We don't have to be afraid of change even though sometimes we are. Just think of it as growing or stepping fully into who you are. You can try to control these things or you can just embrace change. And I'll tell you, embracing change is just so much easier than trying to keep things the same because you can't keep things the same.  

When you roll with the punches and really embrace change as it happens, you can truly be a dynamic woman. 

So I'm curious, which of these five would you say is true about you? Probably a lot of them, if not all of them.  ​