Last week I offered the opportunity for you to "Ask me ANYTHING!" I have to admit I was a little nervous because I thought I might get a super personal question that would be hard to answer - you were all very kind to me!
Over the course of the next few weeks I'll answer what you asked!
Here's the first one from Claudine Pender that I found on my Facebook Page.
Claudine - thank you for that question and for being detailed in your personal experience.
I have been there so many times in every area of my life. Hey! Even this morning when I was wishing I could just go to the park with the kids instead of running to the gym and working out. It wasn’t my best effort, but I went.
Motivation is something that we often feel we need to have in order to accomplish something or even to just get started! AND a lack of motivation will put a huge damper on any success!
A lot of time in coaching we first focus on answering, "Is what you're wanting motivation to do, actually something you want?"
Clarity is important! The reason is, if you're not wanting to do it or at least wanting the result of the hard work then it's impossible to get any motivation.
But the trouble is we often force ourselves to do something we’re not motivated to do, so we meet resistance and it’s difficult and it feels icky.
Last week I coached a new client on a topic she had been coached on 2 years prior, with no success. (No pressure on me right!) Even though she had a clear plan, she never took a step because she had a block in place. She wasn't motivated to do it!
Her perspective of what she wanted to do was not serving her and as we coached it was clear what the BIG WALL was. With that clarity she could finally let it go and we came up with a new way to view what she wanted. She then felt excited and extremely motivated to follow through on a dream that had been unfulfilled for 20 years.
Since this is a blog and I can’t coach you, so I'm not able to uncover what your prospective is and if that's what's holding you back, but I can give you a couple of things to look at in relation to your motivation.
There's a difference between "getting" motivated and "being" motivated.
You used the word "get" when speaking about motivation. We often wait for the "Magical motivation" to arrive. When it doesn't, it's frustrating. When it never comes we stay stuck.
To "get" motivated you focus on external motivations that will push you: having deadlines, accountability to someone else, a coach, or just forcing yourself to do it with the result as the prize.
When you're trying to do this for yourself "being" motivated is what you want to embody so you can move through the process with joy! Or at least feel like it's flowing better.
To "be" motivated you need to find out the WHY of what you want. So in this case it's to take care of yourself. As I continue on, think about something that you have felt a lack of motivation to achieve.
Now ask yourself these questions. I’ll use Claudine’s topic as my example,
Then take all of your answers and to each one ask, what's important about that?
And keep going until you FEEL what you're saying. It could be excitement, joy, happiness, a silence, an aha moment or tears. This is resonance.
I encourage you to find out what the deeper meaning is behind what you want to do.
For Claudine, is it living a long life with her partner?
Is it so she has more energy for her business?
Maybe to be around longer to see her kids grow up?
Whatever the reason, find the resonance and that will be your motivation. Even right it down as a statement…
I am (doing this), so I can (insert deeper meaning).
I wish you the most success in finding your motivation. May it fuel you towards your success and that you feel satisfied. I'd love to see your statement so share below and if you've had success or continue to struggle let me know as well. Coaching is not a one stop shop. I have more to give and I love to listen.
Until next time... be Dynamic!
P.S. Feel like you missed out on a great opportunity to ask me that burning question? YOU DID!
But I'm not a jerk so this is your second and final chance to ask away! (For this round anyway) Or do you have more you want to ask that doesn't fit into one question or that is personal? Then let's book a Clarity Coaching Session or one of my last few Walk & Talk Coaching Sessions for 2015.
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