Have you ever questioned how some women do it all? Have you ever questioned whether confidence is an innate quality that only special women have? Or that some women are just stronger than you?
Being a successful mompreneur takes a lot of confidence and resiliency. As a mompreneur and high performance coach even I’ve questioned myself at times! So rest assured, you are not alone. But here is my promise to you: you are not without tools to learn how to train those muscles up! Let me show you where to start.
First off, let’s agree to think of confidence and resiliency as emotional muscles that need to be built out from a good solid foundation.
In my experience, the keys to a good foundation are:
We are each trying to find our own way as a mom and a business owner, so naturally we look to others and see what they are doing. But I can’t think of a quicker way to crush confidence and resiliency than comparison. We really don’t want to place ourselves above or below anyone else. It’s important to compare yourself to yourself, or compare yourself to your goals. We all start from different places, so comparison is never fair. For example, someone else may have a large extended family that can provide free child care every day of the week. That person will logistically be able to do different things with her business and at a different pace than others.
Another downside of comparison is that it leads to competition and that can damage having an essential support network. Every mompreneur needs a support network. (that's why it’s the next key) Instead of racing against each other, we can be on paths beside each other and unfold wonderful relationships, support, and mentoring. (Want a great community of like-minded supportive women? Then click here to RSVP to a Dynamic Women™ event.)
Unbiased support in a mastermind group or from a coach is the other key to a good foundation. Your supporters are able to see accomplishments you may be overlooking and help give you boost of confidence. Have you ever heard of the phrase “You can’t see the picture if you are in the frame?” Last year my mastermind group had to remind me that having a baby was a huge accomplishment! I completely overlooked that in the face of feeling like I hadn’t got much done in my business.
Once you have a solid foundation, then comes the rest of the training plan. This consists of:
Relevant and obtainable goals are really important for confidence. Goals have to be a good fit for your situation. Setting the same goals as someone else doesn’t make them very attainable or useful because you and your situation are unique. You will know if a goal is attainable if you can commit 100%. For example, if you want to loose 10lbs but can’t get up early in the morning, what you may focus on is drinking 8 glasses of water a day and getting to bed by 10pm. Those things are doable and will definitely increase your energy allowing you to take the next step – getting to the gym.
Consistently doing small things that scare you (ie. pushing your boundaries) allows you to feel the thrill and pride of doing something new. (Check out my full blog article about this here) It maintains and builds future confidence. And as long as you are practicing consistently, the next big scary thing you try won’t seem as scary because you have trained your confidence muscle up.
Have you ever thought back to something courageous you did when you were younger? Whatever was in you that allowed you to be that way still exists! Now how can you pull from that past experience to get traction for your next goals? This is how we build on past success. We look back on what worked, who we were, and what conditions were possible for us to succeed in that moment, knowing that we can create a new similar situation again. Not everything has to be the same – we look at the essence and themes and carry them forward. Looking at the past can help us feel resilient when we face current challenges. We know we have succeeded before, or that situations have been resolved, or that we learned a valuable lesson.
Being a mompreneur is challenging! There is no doubt about that. We can be quite hard on ourselves or overlook our accomplishments as mothers and business owners. We can let the ‘not doing’ gremlins be noisy and easily loose confidence in our abilities. Getting back up when things don’t go as planned is a testament to our resiliency. But both confidence and resiliency are part of your character! They are not a special quality only special people have. Using this training plan will help you grow in both these areas. And if you need a little extra one-on-one, personal training? I am here for you!
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