|
Have you ever thought, "I should be able to handle this myself?” If so, this blog is for you because I'm talking about the capable woman trap: why being good at everything keeps you stuck.  Are You Really Good at Figuring Things Out? Let me ask you something: Are you really good at figuring out things on your own? I already know the answer is probably yes, because you're reading this, and that's the type of person who reads this content. You're a high-achieving, Type A, capable woman. You're smart, resourceful, and you can figure things out. But that can also be what's keeping you stuck. What Is the Capable Woman Trap? It's really that belief: "I am capable, I shouldn't need help." Where does this come from? You've probably spent your whole life being the person who figures things out in your group of people. How this shows up:
That's when the problem hits. In both scenarios, your first instinct is "I've got this, I can do this, I can figure it out." Then the problem is: it works. You do figure it out, but that reinforces itself. It reinforces the idea that you are capable, that you should be able to figure it out, and so you do it. But every time you successfully solve something for someone else, or you do something for your business alone, you think, "See, I don't need any help. I can do it myself." Why It Feels So True (But Isn't) You think "I can do it myself" because:
Here's What's Actually Happening Below the Surface You're spending your time (spending meaning you're not going to get the time back). You're spending your time, your strategic time, your skilled time, the time that you could be earning $500+ an hour, but instead you’re doing $25 an hour tasks. Do you see where this could be a problem? You've maybe heard this and you know this, but you still do:
Could someone else do those things for you? 100% yes. But you still think:
Your Competence Is Your Cage It's actually keeping you stuck. How competent you are is actually your cage. It's caging you in. The more you prove "I can handle this, I can do it on my own, I can be self-reliant and independent," the more you take on in your own business, the more you take on in your life, and the more people will pile things on you. The more you take on also means:
What I often see in my coaching clients or the women I talk to is that they don't have time for cash flow activities (sales calls, strategy, building partnerships, making the right connections, following up on leads). They don't have time for that, and they don't have time for high-value work like high-level client delivery, creating offers, developing programs (the things your clients pay you for, or the things necessary for you to run a great business in the CEO or manager position). But you can't do those things in your business if you're drowning in admin and other things. A Real Example I worked with a woman who earned $75k per year. She’s very capable, and doing everything herself. When we audited her time, she was spending 15 hours a week on tasks that she could hire someone else to do for $20 an hour. That's like:
Do you think you could make that back if you just had some targeted, specific tasks that you did in your day? For sure. Imagine 15 hours a week on cash flow activities, 15 hours a week in that CEO role or the manager role, both. She thought, "I'm saving money by not hiring help," but she wasn't. She was costing herself money, which is the big shift that needs to happen. Those 15 hours a week she could have been doing sales calls, client delivery, strategic planning, basically work that would generate her $30k, $50k, $100k or more per year. Her capability kept her at that $75k until we had her offloading tasks. Then she broke the six-figure mark, and now she is in multiple six figures. My Own Story I learned this myself. I was stuck at the same income level for about three years. I was working 60+ hours a week (probably 70-80 hours most weeks). I was doing:
 I kept thinking, "Once I make more money, then I'll hire help. It's fine that I'm still doing all the things myself." But I wasn't making more money because I was doing all the things myself. Maybe you can relate, or maybe in your life, you're doing all the things yourself and you shouldn't be. I finally made that decision: I need to not just invest in support (a virtual assistant), but in a coach to help me be strategic about it. Even though it felt super scary and I felt like "I just can't afford this," it was like "I can't afford not to." Within six months, my income doubled. Why did I wait so long? And I didn't make more because I worked more. I actually started working less. It was because I finally had that time for those high-value tasks, the high-value work, the cash flow activities, and then the strategy to be able to use that time wisely. The Key Lesson Capacity doesn't scale. Only supported capacity scales. Let me say that again: Capacity doesn't scale. Only supported capacity scales. The two ways to implement this are to hire support to do the work and hire support to coach you, give you strategy and share their proven tools. The Real Cost of the Capable Woman Trap 1. You Turn Down Opportunities You end up turning down opportunities because you just don't have the bandwidth:
Even if you're like "Diane, I would never give up a client opportunity," you might do it in other ways. I was invited to speak at an event. There wasn't really any pay involved (this was earlier in my business), but it was an opportunity to position myself and make an offer. All I needed to do was send them my speaker one-sheet. But because I had to make it myself, I missed the deadline, and they moved on to someone else. That's missing out on an opportunity. 2. You Resent Your Own Success You're really successful, but you're drowning. You're hitting your goals, but you're miserable because you're doing everything yourself. 3. You Take the Long Road You learn as you go instead of learning from someone who has already done it. Or you try to figure out the templates yourself, the strategy yourself, the scripts yourself, the how-tos yourself without just borrowing from someone else who's now providing support in an advisory role.  You don't have to figure out tech for six hours. You can just hire someone to do it in 30 minutes. You don't have to reinvent the wheel every time. You can get that advice from others, put it into place, reap the rewards, or get support to get the things done and then reap those rewards. Shift from Capable and Alone to Capable and Supported I don't want you to stop being capable. You are capable. That's not the question. But capable plus being supported beats being capable alone every time. If you think "I love being capable," great, still be capable, but get some support. I remember reading something about Oprah that said, "I had a coach to be successful, and when I was successful, I didn't drop my coach. I got more coaches."
Are they capable? Absolutely. But they're smart enough, wise enough to realize "I can't do it all myself." Do they do everything alone? Never. Because they know support isn't a luxury. It's a requirement as you get to higher levels and as you build from the level you're at into that six-figure and multi-six-figure, up to seven and beyond. The Question Isn't "Can I Do This Alone?" I know you can. And you've probably proved it time and time again. The question is: What's possible when I don't do it alone? That's such a fun question. Sit with it for a moment. What's possible when I don't do it alone? What Support Actually Looks Like It's not about being weak, it's not about being incapable, lack of independence, lack of being self-reliant. No, it's strategic. You don't find multi-million-dollar companies having their CEO answer the phones, make the social posts, and manage their inbox. There are teams for that, there are people for that. Support can be: 1. Handing over work to a virtual assistant for $25 an hour so that you can focus on tasks that are $500 an hour (this doesn't mean you go organize your desk and take a nap during your work day. You still get the stuff done, but you don't have to work beyond your hours) (Want to chat about having one of my VAs support you? Book a time to chat here. 2. A coach who has already walked the path that you're trying to walk. A lot of times, coaches and business owners hire me because they say, "Diane, I know you've done that before. I want you to show me. I want you to give me the insider scoop. I want you to help take something that would take me years to do and help me do it in months, or months to do and help me do it in a day." 3. A mastermind of peers who challenge you, who champion you 4. A team member who handles what you're not good at (like those sales calls) or the things you don't want to do (like your taxes and your bookkeeping) 5. Someone sharing their systems and templates so you don't have to figure it out, you can just follow what they have done My Invitation to You If you've been listening and thinking, "That's me, I'm the capable woman, I've fallen into this trap," then I want to invite you to: The Wealth Shift This last week, I held two events called The Wealth Shift, where I talked about the ways that you can shift yourself to be able to make the kind of wealth that you're wanting to have. This capable woman trap is one of the pieces that I trained on. If you are local or are willing to travel to North Vancouver, BC, then please email me [email protected] to learn about one of our upcoming events. If you are virtual, too far away, and you want to be at our online training, please sign up for the waitlist, because once I have enough people, I'm going to hold that. Dynamic Wealth Accelerator I invite you to my newest program The Dynamic Wealth Accelerator. It's a two-day intensive where one of the things we do is we map out your support structure. Not in theory, not someday when you can afford it, but we map it out now:
Here's what I know: You can't scale doing everything yourself. You won't. You'll reach a threshold where you can't get past a certain place, and you deserve to not be trapped in your own capability. We're also going to go through:
If you want to learn more about the Dynamic Wealth Accelerator, I encourage you: reach out to at [email protected]. Let's get you out of that capable woman trap and into that ecosystem where you're supported, you're not alone, and you can really start to live the life you're meant to live, that freedom life, and have the type of wealth that you're really looking for. Until next time, stay dynamic!
0 Comments
This time of year is terrible for habit overload. Everywhere you turn, someone's telling you: wake up earlier, journal longer, optimize harder. Basically, your morning routines start to feel like a boot camp or a full-time job rather than something that supports you.  If you've tried to be more disciplined and it just hasn't stuck, don't worry. You're not broken. In this blog, it's all about adding the right habits and choosing habits that actually fit your life now, not you a few years ago, a few years from now, or in a different situation. I want to make sure that any habit you bring in actually helps you feel better, have more clarity, or feel more supported, rather than one that stresses you out or adds more pressure. Positive habits are there to help you create better behaviours for yourself, a better way of living, and to move from something being just a habit to actually part of your lifestyle that you can maintain over time. My Habit Journey I'll be honest, I’ve had plenty of great habits when I was younger. I also had many bad habits. It was easier to have good habits when I didn't have kids, especially young kids, and I could sleep through the night, and my time was more open. Now that my kids are getting older (they're 11 and 14), there's this shift for me. I don't want to do all this habit stacking and pushing with habits. I want the habits that are actually going to help me now. The Problem with Copy-and-Paste Habits You've probably seen this time of year so many people telling you what to do or what habits to bring in:
These copy-and-paste habits or routines will often fail because the context of the habit and who they're for is more important than having the hype or fad habits. What works for someone else may be entirely wrong for you. Especially us women, at different stages in our lives, there will be different habits that are more important. When I was younger, there was a lot of ability to push my body physically and do exercises that really stressed my body. But now that I've come into a different age (a little bit of perimenopause), my body doesn't want to be stressed, and all that's going to do is spike my cortisol. Comparison to other people will create guilt, not the consistency that you're wanting. When you borrow someone else's routine, someone else's habits, you're often borrowing or adopting their expectations too, which might not fit your lifestyle or who you are. Different Seasons Require Different Habits Different seasons of your life require different habits. A habit that worked five years ago might not work for you today, and instead, it might drain you. Rather than having habits that don't fit your life, we want to pick habits that are easy to maintain. A habit that doesn't fit your life will always be difficult to maintain, and we're going for consistency. The Danger of Habit Stacking Habit stacking is when you do one habit on another habit on another habit. I used to do this with the Miracle Morning, where they have something called SAVERS: Silence, Affirmation, Visualization, Exercise, Reading, and Scribing (writing). Adding more habits or stacking them together doesn’t automatically lead to more success. Often, it quietly turns into pressure. When there’s a specific order, a set amount of time, and an expectation to “do it all,” one disruption can derail the whole plan. Instead of building momentum, habit stacking can end up fueling self-criticism and judgment. When you miss one habit, even though you did nine out of ten, you might suddenly feel like the whole day is a failure, or that you didn't start your day right, or that you can't follow through. When Habit Stacking Can Work The Miracle Morning suggests ten minutes for each of six activities (for a total of one hour). Sometimes that's doable for some people. For me, my morning is often getting the kids ready, then getting myself ready, then starting work. I don't necessarily have the time or desire to do that many things.  What I'm doing now is doing a couple of things for longer, and therefore, in my case, better. When I used to do the Miracle Morning, though, I would cut it short if I was short on time. If you've lost half your time, do five minutes each (30 minutes total). Some days, I only did one minute of each thing (six minutes total). There wasn't always that pressure to do all six things for ten minutes. I was able to adapt it based on my day. Better Ways to Stack Habits Another way habit stacking can work is by pairing or connecting things. What if, when you wanted to start doing more squats per day, as you brushed your teeth, you were also squatting? Brushing teeth and squatting, brushing teeth and squatting. What if you wanted to practice gratitude and used voice-to-text as you made your coffee? Instead of stacking habits, try matching a new habit to something you already do well. Anchor it to an existing positive routine. For me, I’ve joined a “read the Bible in a year” group and chose to listen to the narration and scripture while getting ready in the morning. I only do it when I can actually pay attention, and not for the entire time, because reflection matters just as much as listening. Common Signs You're Taking On Too Many Habits
Gentle truth: If your habits drain you, they're not supportive. Even good habits stop being good if they drain you. If something is costing more energy than it gives back, it’s not serving you. Only commit to what you can realistically sustain, and often that means reducing your commitment, not pushing harder. Habits That Support Your Capacity You might be able to relate to not having the bandwidth or the capacity for something. After my father died, I heard that grief can kill your capacity and your bandwidth. I was like, "Ah, that makes so much sense as to why I can't do all the things I normally do." Rather than focusing on output, let's focus on capacity because we focus far too much on productivity (what are we doing, doing, doing) and not enough on sustainability. Habits That Restore Energy
Habits That Simplify Decisions
 For example, I was just working with a new client to bring more movement into her life. She wanted to start yoga again. Rather than saying, "I'm going to go to yoga every single day or five days a week," I said, "How many could you 100% do?" She said two. The result? One week she did three; the other week she did four. She was able to go beyond what she had committed to. Habits That Protect Your Focus One task at a time: I like to use Toggl to tell it what I'm doing: replying to emails, writing the event description. Then I only focus on that. I actually did a video about the Pomodoro technique. That helps reduce the noise and interruptions in my mind because I'm just focusing on that one task. Also using Brain.fm (binaural beats) helps me focus even better. Adding that in doesn't actually take any more time or energy, but it gives it back to me. Key reminder: Output is going to follow your capacity, not willpower. Seasonal Habits: Picking Your Habits for the Season There are life seasons and business seasons. In a previous post, I talked about momentum seasons and maintenance seasons. Momentum seasons: Growth season is when the business is growing. An energetic season is where you have a lot of energy, creativity, and gumption. A supportive season is where you have other people supporting you. Times when the stars are aligned. That's when you can bring on more habits and have more capacity and output. Maintenance seasons: Maybe when you're a parent, perhaps when you're healing or someone else is healing, or you're recovering, or you're ill, or there's been a terrible diagnosis, grief, or whatever it may be. This is a time to level out and just do the things that have to be done, or maybe do some things behind the scenes, rather than pushing, rather than lots of output, because your capacity and bandwidth are smaller. Your habits should reflect those two different times. You're not going to attempt to run a marathon during maintenance season. You're probably not going to launch a new business during maintenance season. You have permission to evolve. You're allowed to change your habits as your life changes. Ask yourself:
That's going to help you really decide how many habits you can have or how many you need to cut. Choose Fewer Habits, But Better Habits Maybe there's just one to three meaningful habits that you could have, and that would have so much more power than doing ten of them poorly. Pick habits that quietly support everything else. Ask yourself: What habit would make everything else easier? It could be going to bed earlier. An earlier bedtime might help you more with focus and energy than a long morning routine. Weekly planning instead of daily overwhelm. When you plan once, you stop negotiating with yourself every single morning because it's already decided. Maybe it's having support systems instead of pushing harder to multitask. Rather than saying "I'm going to do it all myself," you get help with the things you need. Fewer commitments in your life could be the thing that beats better time management. If you learn to just say no more, you wouldn't need habits to manage your time. Fewer habits that support your energy will always outperform the habits that demand it. You don't need more motivation, more willpower, or more discipline. You just need the right fuel in the first place. Wouldn't that be much easier? A Small Example: Coffee and Anxiety Sometimes I get anxiety. I could add in all these breathing activities, more walks, and putting my legs up against the wall. But one small thing I did is this: I heard that if you drink coffee on an empty stomach, it can cause anxiety. So now I eat my breakfast first, have a herbal tea or water with it, and then have my coffee after breakfast. Sometimes it's just switching things around rather than adding a bunch of habits. Because if I'm adding in breathwork, legs-up-the-wall, tapping, or other habits, that's going to take me 5 to 10, 15, or 20 minutes a day, rather than just changing when I drink my coffee. (Important note: I'm not saying don't meditate. I'm not saying don't do things for your nervous system or to calm you or for your anxiety. Please do the things. I'm just trying to show you how you can change something small, some small habit, rather than adding on a whole bunch of other ones.) The Goal The goal isn't to have this perfect routine where every area of our life has the best habits. It's more about picking and choosing to build sustainable habits. Less can actually move you forward faster. Wrap Up The best habits are the ones that fit your real life, the ones you're actually going to do. As you evolve as a business owner, a leader, and a high achiever, your habits should evolve with you. Makes sense, doesn't it? You don't need more discipline; you just need alignment. Choose the right habits, or delete the ones that don't fit into your life right now. Choose habits for the life and season you're in right now. Your Challenge Here's a little challenge for you, or an invitation: Take one habit off your plate this week that is not serving you, and just notice how it feels. Maybe it feels a lot better. Choose habits that support you now; choose habits that support who you are becoming. These are the habits that matter now. Until next time, stay dynamic!
It has been 13 years since I started the Dynamic Women community. Lots has changed over the years, and now I think it's time to redefine what it means to be a dynamic woman because it's beyond doing it all.  The Outdated Image Many people think a dynamic woman is someone who's doing it all. But that is such an outdated image of a strong woman. Why is it that a strong woman is the one who's hustling and doing all this stuff and filling her calendar and achieving? This is so outdated. I'm not saying that ever was my definition of a dynamic woman, but it's not about achieving success by choosing self-sacrifice, self-abandonment, doing it all, holding it all together, and never needing help. I want to question, very gently, my original intention, where it came from, and make sure that we have evolved, that this definition is super clear as we move into another year, where I still stand so strongly behind being dynamic. What Dynamic Is Not To go even further:
These definitions will quietly and very quickly exhaust women. Why I Originally Started Dynamic Women That's where I was at when I wanted to create the Dynamic Women community. At the time, it was even called Dynamic Women in Action, and I took "in action" off for multiple reasons. The main one is that just calling us Dynamic Women was enough. We didn't have to be in action. As a co-active coach, I was taught about the “being” and the “doing”, and I wanted to make sure that we brought the being in. If we're always Dynamic Women in Action, in the doing, then we're never in the being. After my daughter was a year old, I started to get back into networking. I was like, "Oh, this sucks." Maybe you feel that way now about networking. It was a lot of "Here's my business card, here's what I do, buy from me." It was very transactional and surface-level, and it was really starting to tick me off.  I thought, "Okay, I can be mad about this, or I can do something about it." So there I am, 2 AM, middle of the night, when I should be sleeping, thinking, "What can I do? I want to start my own group." Because if I can be bitter, or I can make things better, I'm going to make things better. I thought, "Confident Women group." But then no, because some women will feel like they’re not confident and I don't want them to feel left out. I then feel I downloaded the word "dynamic," because I thought, "Well, dynamic sounds really powerful. It sounds like a catalyst for change." The Power of Dynamic When I dove deeper, this word was super powerful, but it didn't mean that the woman had to be powerful in a forceful, productive, hustle way. Instead, what I found when I started each of my eight locations for the Dynamic Women community was that every time I started them and talked about what it meant to be dynamic, the words that I received from the women were polar opposites:
On and on, we got the polar opposites. So basically, being dynamic was every positive attribute, skill, quality, and adjective ever possible to define who a woman was. I thought, "Great, this encompasses all women. All women get to be dynamic." My Evolution Over time, the pendulum has swung for me, I have been very extroverted, outgoing and powerful, and I do a lot of things, and while that is still me, now I’m more on the “being” side in a lot of my life. I have experienced the benefit of being and as I have struggled with postpartum depression, regular depression, grief and overwhelm with my nervous system getting wrecked and other health issues, I've realized, "Wow, the dynamic woman is not about the push and the hustle and all that. It's around so much more." The Stages We Go Through Let’s discuss some stages that maybe you have felt, that you've gone through: Stage 1: Proving Ourselves In the early stages of anything we're doing, or even in our 20s and such, or as a new mom, or just earlier on in things, we're at a stage of having to prove ourselves. The way we prove our worth is by doing more. We have to prove we are capable. We have to prove our competence.  Sometimes that means…
Stage 2: Setting Boundaries As we grow over time, we start to set some boundaries and guidelines and make more decisions because we're starting to feel like, "Oh yeah, now I know more of what I'm doing." We can set some of these boundaries or guidelines in our work, and we start to see where we fit in. Our expertise grows, our competence does too, and we start feeling better about ourselves as we do better. We eventually get to a point where we're just like, "Screw all of that self-abandoning and doing all this stuff I don't want to do. I'm going to do what matters. I'm going to do the things in my life that are the priorities to me." It's not like you didn't have priorities before, but it was really difficult to stick to them. It was hard to set guidelines, be firm about them, and follow through. Stage 3: Living the Life You Want Then we get to this point later in life, where we get to live the life we really want to live and build the business we really wish to build. What I started to see in some of the ladies in the Dynamic Women community was that over the topics we had in monthly meetings, as they joined my coaching programs, as they worked one-on-one with me, they really were stepping into that higher place, that next stage. It was almost like they graduated. They fully came into who they were meant to be. They took the maturity in their success and were able to say:
This is how we go from proving to choosing. Your Identity Shifts Too Just as my clients and members were elevating and moving up, I was also elevating and moving up and making different choices for myself. I want to give you permission to change: Different seasons of your life require different versions of you. I'm going to say that again because I really want you to have this land: Different seasons of your life will require different versions of you. It doesn't mean you have to change yourself because you're bad. It means you will let go of identities that once served you but no longer do. I let go of:
It's okay to have a different version of you. It's okay to let go of past versions of you, even if people are like, "But that's what I love about you." Well, you know what? That's not who you have to be moving forward. You have permission to evolve without explanation. That's the same for a dynamic woman. She gets to evolve with all those different qualities and attributes, those polar opposites. She gets to choose whatever comes in. The New Dynamic Woman I'm inviting you into this new version of the dynamic woman:
She doesn't want that. (I hate when people say "you're so busy," because I've worked so hard not to be, to be able to honour myself and my family.) There is such a hidden cost to always pushing. You might be in a season where you can push, and that is working for you. Great. I'm speaking to the women who have pushed for so long or are now in a place where they have suffered from pushing so hard, from hustling, and they've gotten to that place of saying, "What now? I've checked off every box; I've had the success. What now? Why am I not happy?" The dynamic woman gets to be happy. Join Me for a Special Event There's a special event I have coming up on January 29 in North Vancouver. I'm going to bring these next-level, evolved, redefined dynamic women together. I'm holding two events on the 29th. It’s called, The Wealth Shift: How to Grow Your Business to 6 Figures and Beyond. Since you are a reader of the Dynamic Women content, I really want to reward you. There is no way I could have won five awards for the Dynamic Women podcast, that we could be in the top 2.5% of all podcasts, or had over 347 episodes without you. If you're curious about this next stage, if you want to be in the energy of that room, get some learning I’m going to share, and meet other like-minded women who are ready for that as well, then I invite you to come. The Wealth Shift is an intimate, in-person business workshop for women who are ready to grow their income without working harder or doing it alone. In this focused session, you’ll uncover the subtle shifts that separate businesses that plateau from those that scale. We’ll explore how successful women often mismeasure progress, leak time and opportunity, and rely too heavily on effort instead of structure, support, and alignment. You’ll leave with clarity around what’s actually driving income growth at the next level, where your current approach may be limiting you, and what needs to change to build sustainable wealth in your business and life. What Replaces Hustle What replaces hustle is:
She Chooses Wisely This new dynamic woman, you can be her. She's going to choose to be dynamic, and in life she will choose wisely. She knows that the ability to choose is the power. Her choosing herself, her priorities, her values, what brings her satisfaction is not weakness; it's wisdom. That's where the new dynamic woman is today. Thank you so much for reading. I so appreciate you. Until next time, stay dynamic!
You may think that to reach your goals, you need more willpower, but you don't. The problem isn't discipline. It's trying to carry growth, decisions, and momentum all alone. You don't need more willpower. You need more support. In your life. In your business. In your career. Or whatever it may be.  Imagine This Just for a moment, think about how different the year would be if you felt this way…
Reaching your goals, having a great life, and having the success and satisfaction you want isn’t about pushing harder. We often think, "Let's just do more, let's be more, let's have more in our calendar." That's not the case. Sometimes it's just about consistent support. My Realization There have been many times in my life when I felt like I couldn't quite get where I needed to be. I was capable and committed, but the workload felt heavier than it needed to be. I remember a time when I was launching these programs. I knew they were great, and others did too, but I wasn't getting the results I needed. I couldn't understand it. If I were just to use willpower, which oftentimes I resort to (maybe you do as well), it had me pushing harder and pushing through the troubles. It had me handling decisions alone. It ended up being a quiet burnout that was starting to take me out. The realization I had was that I didn't need more discipline. I didn't need to do more. I just needed support. That's when I knew I had to tap back into my coach and my mastermind group to bounce ideas off them, get strategy, and have them cheer me on. It was freeing to realize that willpower isn't the solution, and having people around me was so much more fun. The Truth About Willpower High-achieving women are taught: just try harder, be stronger, and you should be able to figure it out yourself. We do, right? We totally do. But at what cost? Late nights trying to get over the doubt, or even when you are doing well, and it's just feeling hard. The truth is that willpower is finite. There's only a certain amount that we can have, and even if we're at a very high level, it doesn't always recharge. We burn through it, and then what are we going to do? Support instead is sustaining. Support is invigorating, motivating, and confirming. If you're growing with willpower only, your growth will stall. It's not laziness, it's isolation. What Support Actually Does Two different ways of support and each has it’s own purpose:
Three things support gives you: 1. Perspective When You're Too Close I love this Les Brown quote: "When you're in the frame, you can't see the picture." Because you're in it, you can't see it. I can remember this one time I was trying to figure out what my "one thing" was. I kept saying to myself, "What is it? What is it?" I was trying various approaches. Eventually, I brought this to a little coaching triad I had (two coaches and me, three people). I said to them, "I just don't know. I'm trying to figure out what my thing is, and I’ve been trying for a long time." They said, "Diane, isn't it that?" It was right in front of my face, but I couldn't see it because I was too close. 2. Language for What You're Feeling A lot of times, coaches have been able to reframe things for me to say, "Oh, it sounds like you are running on low. It sounds like you're frustrated by this. It sounds like you may have self-abandoned in that situation. Now you're feeling guilt or shame or frustration and disappointment." I was like, "Yes, yes." Sometimes I knew that was the thing, and just having them confirm that, witness me, was enough. Other times, they actually gave me the sense that I finally had my solution: "Oh, that's it, that's it." By understanding how I felt, I was able to determine what I needed to do to move past it. 3. Permission to Pause and Recalibrate When you have someone with you, they provide that space so that you can say, "Yeah, I didn't think of it that way," or "Yeah, these are some possibilities." If we don't have that permission to pause, we just keep going. We keep trying to push and go, go, go, go. It's like you're on a train, and you never get off enough to check that you're actually going in the right direction, or to get on the correct train in the direction you need to go (that's the recalibration piece). We need space to pause, think, brainstorm, double-check, tune in, and recalibrate. To make a change, to just do one degree to the other side, to step back in and recommit. Momentum Comes from Support, Not Pressure Momentum doesn't come from pressure, but from accountability. It's kind of funny when I hear my clients say, "Oh yeah, I did that right before the call," or "I did that last night." So a little bit of accountability was helpful in that case, but not pressure that feels like guilt. That's not what we're looking for. Momentum comes from that ability to reflect and then to reinforce that decision that you have made to move forward, whatever that goal is. I know that, for myself, when I'm showing up in a group, I make sure my work is done because I want to be as committed as everyone else. Being in a space where everyone is committed to their own goals, whether big or small, life or business-focused. Having the right support and accountability really does move you forward. I know that many times, I wouldn't be where I am if I were relying solely on my own accountability. Isn't it odd that we're okay with dropping things for ourselves but not for others? We stay committed to other people's things, but not our own. What My Clients Discovered This topic came up because I conducted wrap-up calls with clients from The Breakthrough in 2025. They shared these comments about the monthly calls with the group which are something new I had added in:
It's that "I know I'm not in this alone," or hearing someone else be coached by me, that gives them the learning they need as well. The key thing was they weren't behind. They just needed a place to land and reset. We used to hold meetings just once a year when we made the blueprint, and with those I kept coaching, I saw how much better they did than those who went it alone. But when I started adding the quarterly calls, their results began to improve. Then I realized quarterly isn't enough, because that's only four times a year they get that check-in. They needed more. Just like if you were going to practice the piano, you need to do it more than just four times a year. You need to do it consistently to improve. The ability to tap into the group, get support and coaching, and be accountable at least once a month has moved them far beyond the goals they set for themselves. The Breakthrough 2026  A reminder: doors are open right now for The Breakthrough Program. In 2026, if you don't have a place that you can get that reset, accountability, reflection, to be able to see what's in the frame, to see what the picture looks like, then I invite you to join. It's not that the women needed more information to reach their goals. It's because they finally had that support, the support that had been lacking in the previous years. The Breakthrough 2026 is a year-long coaching experience designed to help you avoid relying on willpower. Each month, there's a call where you can reflect, recalibrate, and stay connected to what matters most, even when life gets busy. Life will get busy, and your accountability or commitment may slip. But you have that check-in point to re-energize and be re-motivated to continue. If you're capable but tired of carrying it all yourself, this is likely the support you've been missing. Two Questions for You Ask yourself now: 1. Where are you using willpower instead of support Is it with your goals? Is it in your business? 2. What would feel lighter if you didn't do it alone? For me, it's funny. For my health and fitness, I've always played sports. I laugh because I've said numerous times: I will run because the coach tells me. I will complete the drills during practice because I’m doing them with my team. You Don't Need to Become Someone Else I know there's a lot of hype right now around "new year, new you," but you don't have to become someone else. You don't need to buy into the hustle culture. You don't need more grit. Instead, you need support to stay aligned. It's not a weakness. It's a very wise decision. This year can feel lighter. This year, you can reach all of your goals, and you don't have to do it solo. Join The Breakthrough. Doors are closing, so you'll want to get in now. I'm always curious: what was it about this that helped you or intrigued you? What have been some takeaways? I'm always open to hearing it. You can email me: [email protected]. Until next time, stay dynamic!
Imagine ending 2026 feeling clear, proud, steady. You're not burned out, you're not scrambling, you're not wondering "Where did the year go?" feeling like you just lived the year instead of actually making it exactly how you want it to be.  This is your reminder to stop letting the year happen to you. Have You Ever Felt This? Have you ever felt that feeling of:
I totally felt like that. I felt like I kept having success, but something was missing, or I kept getting stopped in similar places or with similar obstacles, or making the same mistakes. I was thinking, "Rather than just have another successful year, how can I build on the last year and feel great about it?" That's ultimately the question that made me pause and ask: What if this could be THE year for You?
Why Years Blur Together That's what can happen when you either stop winging it or using a basic plan. You use a deeper blueprint, one that is not just these top-of-mind goals that you have, but goals that are formed out of reviewing the previous year, that come from you getting a magnifying glass and looking more closely at the things that your heart is desiring. Most women don't lack ambition. They lack a space to reflect before they jump into their next year's goals. Then, during the year, they lack the space to brainstorm, bounce ideas, and get support on how things are going. Planes are off course 95% of the time, and they keep correcting course. If you lack space to reflect, a clear decision filter, or the support to stay aligned or motivated when life gets busy or hard, you won't have your best year. High achievers default to action instead of intention. I have been guilty of this for many years before I started my Breakthrough practice. So now, I don't feel like the year is happening to me.  You don't want the years to blur together. You don't want the years to just be, "I checked off the boxes." You want the years to be powerful and intentional in their own way. For you, I really want every year to be, in its own way, a breakthrough year. What a Breakthrough Year Really Is A breakthrough year is not about bigger goals, hustling harder, or fitting more in. It's not. That's what high achievers think: "This is the year I'm going to push harder, I'm going to do more, I'm going to have more, I'm going to be more." The way I look at it is, your breakthrough year actually starts with the honesty of:
When clarity comes before action, it will help create a breakthrough year. Intentional pacing to keep up with your vision. You can achieve the things you want to achieve AND still feel whole inside. It's about having not just a plan, but a blueprint you can revisit without abandoning any aspect. We all know, resolutions get abandoned pretty quickly. But how about goals? How about strong goals that are part of a full blueprint, a one-page plan that you can look at and use to guide you, plus support to get you there? Often, we are like a solo sailor on a ship, required to move the sail, steer, and protect the ship. And it's like, well, if I have to do all this alone, when do I eat, and when do I enjoy, and when do I rest? And who encourages us, and who works with us when we’re alone? Too often, we’re solopreneurs in our work, the lone wolf in our lives, and also alone towards our goals. BUT we need that support or at least consistent touch points. Two Powerful Questions I ask you: 1. What do you want to feel more of by the end of 2026? 2. What are you done repeating? When I guide clients through my breakthrough process, we identify patterns they have repeated throughout the year and possibly even the previous year. By completing the process, they became aware of it and made changes, developing the skills and tools to avoid repeating it. You may be done repeating:
What’s your answer to those two questions? Jot those down. This is just a sentence. This is just a word or two. This is not a full plan. But are you already seeing or feeling how these types of questions can help you create a more powerful plan for the next year? Because we don't want the year to just happen. We want to be intentional with more ease and more flow. Introducing The Breakthrough 2026 I want to introduce something to you. You might have heard of it before, but it's called The Breakthrough 2026. It supports clarity, confidence, and consistency, while having a year of support from me and other like-minded women. Who Is This For? Really, it's for a woman who doesn't want to have another year on autopilot, who doesn't want to feel alone. I've been doing this process for over 15 years, and it's been refined. It has been expanded to create a comprehensive blueprint. At first, we'd create one set of tools and be done. Then I added more tools and more to the process to create a full blueprint. Then, maybe two years ago, we did quarterly check-ins. But what I realized people were missing was a monthly group coaching focus and the accountability. That's why this program is now a year-long coaching experience. It's designed to help you slow down enough to get clear at the beginning, right? At the beginning, we slow down and get the breakthrough blueprint. It's so exciting. It's not only tools to help you or a compass to guide you, but also the motivation to achieve it.  What Makes This Different I created this for women who are thinking, "Yes, yes, I don't want another year to go by. I want to be intentional and supported. I want this to be my breakthrough year." We start off with my 3-Phase Process:
Then we can create the blueprint you can refer to daily. Some people keep it close to their desk or in their planner because it helps them throughout the year. It's not just a one-time thing. Again, this isn't about doing more. It's about doing what matters, with support from my monthly group coaching sessions, which guide you, help ground you and encourage you. Is this for You? If you're craving that clarity, want to take ownership of your year, be confident, and make the next 12 months feel aligned rather than exhausting, you can learn more here. I'd love to walk you through the process and be with you throughout 2026 to see your goals come to life, because that's the most exciting part. Stop Letting the Year Just Happen to You Take back the reins. If this stirred something in you, trust that. If you're interested, check it out. If you have questions, reach out to me at [email protected]. In closing, you don't need to do this alone. You aren't braver, better, smarter, or more accomplished when you do it alone. Trust me, goals are not enough. You may achieve a lot with goals, but you leave more on the table when you actually have a blueprint and know how to use it. It is like rocket fuel to achieve your goals. You don't need to do it alone. I'm here. The other ladies in the program are here. And the cool thing is, you don't have to have it all figured out before you join the program. I'll help you to do that. Until next time, stay dynamic!
Have you ever thought that maybe there's a future version of you that's wishing you had made different decisions at this time?  In this week’s blog, I'm going to be talking about what your future you is begging you to do before the year ends. 5-Day Reset Before I dive in, I also want to let you know that I'm in the middle of the free 5-Day Reset, which no matter when you're reading this, I encourage you to go through. It's a really great way to close off one year and start the next year. It's something I do every year at this time, and it is free to join. If we're still doing it, you can upgrade by donation. All donations are going to women's shelters, and I'm going to match them as well. If you upgrade, you'll be part of the Zoom live sessions, where you can ask questions, share your answers, and receive coaching from me. I'll keep the recordings up for a little bit after it finishes, in case you're reading this at a later time. Imagine Yourself One Year From Now Let's just imagine yourself one year from now. You're not stressed, you're chill. You think, "Wow, I've had such a great year." Then, ask your future self:
You might want to pause and answer those questions, think through them. This isn't about regret. It's about awareness. It's about possibility. The worst thing you can do is get to the end of the year, look back and say "This year was not how I wanted it to be.” or “This year, I'm so glad it's over because there was so much bad in it". Again, not about regret, but listen to the answers that your future self is telling you. What Your Future Self Doesn't Want I'm guessing that your future self doesn't want:
What Your Future Self Does Want They want support. Support isn't weakness. They want more joy, more goals being accomplished, more vision coming to life. All of this is wisdom that comes from experience What you can do is listen to what your future self is telling you and take the opportunity right now to make an action that's going to help your future self be able to look back and say, "Wow, that was great. That was such a great year."  I'm guessing what your future self is asking for:
An Invitation Your Future You Wants You to Say Yes To Your future self hopes you’ll accept my invitation to the Women's Business Success event. It's a moment of alignment at the start of the year. It's a time to pause, to be grounded before the year picks up speed. It's a room designed to support the next version of you. You don't have to change who you are. It's just the 2.0, the 3.0, the 4.0, whatever version you're on. When: January 8 (two sessions: morning and afternoon) Where: Live and in person in North Vancouver, BC Can't attend in person? We're doing a waitlist for an online version Your future you wants to be able to focus on clarity, confidence, and connection, and to have these three pieces locked in at the start of the year. It's Not About Doing More People say, "Diane, how do you do so much?" I get that I have virtual assistants that do a lot for me. But before I had any help and with my clients who still don’t have help. We all start with the same thing… clarity: knowing exactly where you're going so you don't need to second-guess yourself and waste time. It's having the confidence to go for it, even if it's things that will stretch you, because the more time we spend procrastinating, the more time we burn. Then you can get into action, doing the thing you had clarity and confidence to do. The event is the connection, the ability to share and grow and learn with other women around you so that you don't feel alone. Why Does the Timing Matter? Early January sets the tone for the rest of the year. A lot of times people feel like they don't really get their groove until the end of January. This is going to help you get that groove going early on in the year, to take advantage of all those days. Really, what you choose now is going to shape how the year unfolds. That goes beyond just choosing to attend (which is free, by the way, there's just a seat deposit). What you choose from today until the end of the year, what you choose from January 1 and beyond, that's going to shape how the whole year unfolds. What you do first thing in the morning, what you say yes to, what you fill your calendar with. Having support chosen early is going to create ease later. Choosing Alignment Before Habits Lock In Let me be the one to lead your kick-off. Lean on me to be the one to help create that clarity, the confidence, and the connection for you, because it's really about choosing alignment before the habits fully lock in. We want everything we're choosing to be in alignment so that our habits can then form based on that clarity and that alignment.  There’s no point in jumping forward if you don’t have the clarity; you're not going to feel confident to take action because it's not going to be in alignment. Choose Yourself Early This time of year can have a significant impact, so it's important to close the year right. It's important to feel good at the start of the year. I want you to have confidence that 2026 will be different and can be better than any year you've had. Choosing yourself early on is powerful because, trust me, other people will take your time. Other people will have you choose their agendas. Choosing yourself early, putting this in your calendar on January 8, is going to not only be a powerful thing for you at the start of the year (powerful by attending and getting the information and connecting with others and having a fun and productive time), but it's going to teach you that you choose yourself moving forward. We are often the last on our priority list, very far down or not even on it at all, because other people, our family, our friends, our neighbours, our clients, our volunteering, our boards, whatever it is that we do, are often ahead of our own needs. You Don't Need to Be Ready Please know you don't need a perfect plan. You don’t need to arrive with a plan for this event. You don't need everything figured out. You actually don't need anything figured out. You can come and let me guide you through the material I've prepared for the Women's Business Success event. If you're thinking, "I'm reading this, and I really love your stuff, Diane, and I want to come, but I don't have a business," that's okay. You are still welcome to come. Your Future You is Waiting Your future you wants you to be there on January 8 in North Vancouver. If you can't, there will be a waitlist for the online version. Please just make sure you sign up because as soon as I have enough people, I'm going to run that. You don't need to be ready. You just need to show up. Your future you will start to be formed on that day. Trust me, your future self is going to look back on this moment and say, "Wow, you listened. You chose yourself, and you booked your seat to be at the Women's Business Success event". This is the moment you get to choose support, choose the clarity, choose momentum, and choose connection with the other ladies that are there. There are only 10 spots per session, so please don't be disappointed. Grab your seat today. Thank you so much for being part of my 2025 journey. I would love to hear from you: [email protected].
Until next time, stay dynamic! No matter what it seems the world is telling you now, you don't have to follow a "new year, new you" approach. All you need is a little reset.  You don't have to overhaul your life. Small, intentional steps over five days can change everything. I'm going to share today about doing a reset and how I’m excited to bring back my 5-Day Reset, and you can join it for free. Permission to Reset Let me first start with permission. Permission to reset. I want you to have the relief that a reset is just a little change. It's not the pressure and the hardship of making everything new. Many women have been feeling a little stressed this time of year, and we're ready for a fresh start. We're curious what's next, and we're not interested in extreme resolutions or massive plans. While we may have big dreams and big goals, we don't want the hardship and the challenge that it can feel like. Instead, a reset is going to feel gentle, intentional, and doable, especially at this time of year. We don't need to go off for 12 days and do something major. Just five simple activities over five days. This is not about fixing yourself. It's about reconnecting with yourself. Especially over the holidays, you're giving so much to everyone else, and we want 2026 to start off really well. I'm inviting you to pause, reflect, and step forward with clarity rather than urgency. Why Resets Work Better Than Resolutions  We all know that resolutions last, what, like a month? They're often related to things we feel pressure to do:
Often, they fail because they are too big, too vague, too disconnected from real life, or we’re not fully committed or motivated to act. Many times, we haven't done the reset and the foundational work that follows before setting the right goals for us. But a reset works because it's happening one simple step at a time. It creates momentum so you feel that push, that flow forward rather than overwhelm. It's going to build your confidence quickly because after completing each activity you're going to feel accomplished saying, "That was easy." The Power of a Reset This approach has:
The 5-Day Reset: December 28 - January 2 The 5-Day Reset is something I've been doing for years. I can remember bringing my kids in on it when they were young, then I started telling my one-on-one clients. Over time, it was important I shared it with more people. I brought it to my Dynamic Women community, my email list, my podcast listeners and so many more. It's been a really fun experience. Though, the past two years I felt like I just wanted to really unplug over the break, so I haven't been sharing, but I've still been doing it on my own...until this year!  What It Actually Gives You Over the five days between December 28 to January 2, we're going to:
So many times people are jumping into goal setting before they've done this little reset and before they've built the foundation for the next year. This is around having clarity, not hustle. There are no major activities for you to do, instead it’s very quick and easy. It's more about awareness than self-judgment or judgment from others (because let's be real, there's enough of that). It's about momentum, not burnout. Why This Reset Is Different A lot of things around goal setting and personal development are meant to be a challenge, meant to be hard, meant to push you. This is not the time of year to be doing that. Those will drain your energy. This one is designed to fit into your real life, even during the busiest season. What Makes It Different:
You're not going to be doing this alone. You've got me, and you've got the other ladies doing it, so you'll have support and guidance built into the experience. The Power of Doing This Together Growth happens faster when we don’t do it alone. When we’re in community, with camaraderie and accountability, something shifts. Sometimes we’re the ones sharing, and other times we’re listening, but even when someone else is speaking, we often hear exactly what we need. Their words spark insights, reflections, and ideas we might never arrive at on our own. Many people try to grow by reading a book or doing a program in isolation, and while that can help, being in a shared space is different. The collective energy, the accountability, and the confidence that comes from learning alongside other women creates momentum. It’s motivating, grounding, and far more powerful than doing it by yourself. Two Ways to Participate Option 1: Self-Paced with Community
Option 2: VIP Group Coaching (by donation going to a women’s shelter)
Who Is This For?
If you want to set the year off intentionally rather than reactively, I invite you to jump into this. Pricing: Free or Donate to Women's Shelters I offer this completely free, and if free is what you can afford, then great, take that option. What I also love to do at this time of year is give back financially to women’s shelters. I support one locally here in North Vancouver, BC and another in Brantford, Ontario, my hometown. As a result, I’m including an optional donation option. There’s a suggested amount, but you’re invited to give whatever feels right for you. (You can etransfer or Paypal me a different amount at [email protected]. Every donation goes directly to supporting women’s shelters. When you donate you’ll be invited into the VIP Group Coaching. That's my gift to you:
You Don't Need to Be Ready Don't worry. You don't have to have your goals ready yet. Please don't, actually. You don't need a perfect plan. You don't need any plan. You just need the willingness to say, "Yes, I'm in. I'm coming." Join the 5-Day Reset Simple daily steps, supportive environment, fresh start, no stress, super doable at this time of year. Join for yourself. Invite a friend. Get a group of girls together and make it something that you do together. I'm really looking forward to starting the 5-Day Reset, since I haven't done it in three years. I'm excited to reopen this because of the energy and momentum it will give you, and the clarity you'll gain from taking these small steps. It's going to be so good. You have permission to not make a new year and a new you this year, just to do a simple reset. If you have any questions, reach out to my team: [email protected]. Until next time, stay dynamic!
If you're building a business, I have a very special Christmas gift for you. The gift arrives in 2026, and I'll reveal it shortly, but first, I want to share something.  December is a natural pause point for women in business and in high-level roles. It's a natural pause for our businesses: our clients may not need us, we may be looking to wrap up the year, reflect on the past year, and prepare for the next. We're thinking: What have we built? What have we learned? What have we navigated this year? At this point, you're probably closing loops, celebrating wins, and starting to imagine what's coming next. Even when things are going well, December invites these bigger questions: What do I want more of next year? How do I want success to feel? This is an intentional moment, a zoom out so we can look ahead with optimism. You Deserve Strong Support Women are often the planners, the connectors, the vision holders. We're the ones who make things happen and keep everything moving. In business, that means we have the leadership, the resilience, the adaptability. But it isn't about depletion. We shouldn't just be waiting for the holiday time to recoup and re-energize. It's really about recognizing how much capacity we have, how much capacity exists in us, and how much capacity we want moving forward. Strong women also deserve strong support, strong motivation, and strong inspiration. Giving to yourself is powerful. Christmas is about generosity and care. Sometimes the most meaningful generosity is directed inwards. We are leading, building, and creating, and we are in need of support as well. Where Have You Been Generous? Think about where you've been generous with your time, your energy, your leadership this year. Where might you choose to invest back into yourself? Maybe that's the gift you really need. We don't need another physical gift, another purse, another mug, another planner, another productivity tool. What really creates momentum? Three things:
Right now, clarity, confidence, and community, which of the three is the most exciting to you? Take a moment. What's your gut decision? The honest truth is you can be successful and still crave connection. You can be confident and still want a stronger circle of support. When you take ambition, your strength, skills, talents and gifts, and connect that with support, it's such a winning combination. The Power of Being in the Right Room For me, I just came back from the CAPS convention (the Canadian Association of Professional speakers) in Halifax. When I am in the right room, it expands my thinking, especially being in the high-income earners group. Those are my people, the people who understand the challenges I go through. You know that feeling when the right event, convention, or room sparks new confidence in you and creates new possibilities, and from that, energy and perspective. There's so much power in being surrounded by your people, especially with other women who are growing too and wanting more for themselves, wanting more success for the business, but also wanting more in life. There's a difference between consuming information (that we're all being bombarded with it) and actually being invested in an experience. Being in person matters for momentum, belief, energy, and resonance. My Gift to You That's why I want to go back to my roots. When I first started running my business, especially after my daughter was born. I was sick of surface-level networking and started the Dynamic Women community. I started with one location and grew to eight, running live events and in-person training. Then I moved online with COVID, and I'm ready to bring it back. I'm ready to recreate these special containers, special spaces that have intention, that have heart, and that are kick-butt in the information and the experience we have. The Women's Business Success Seminar Returns The very first one I ran was in Vancouver at Hycroft Manor, an Edwardian mansion. We were in the big ballroom with 70 women for a three-hour event. It was amazing. I kept running these events in North Vancouver, Vancouver, Burnaby, and Ontario. They are designed specifically for women building businesses who want to grow with clarity, confidence, and connection.  I brought it online and it was still magical. But recently I've been thinking: I want to get back to being in person and I don't want to do the big ones right now. What I want to do is small, intimate ones where we all sit around a table, and we get to share learn, engage and have an experience. It's designed to help you step into the next year (and the next quarter, the next month, the next day) with clear direction and stronger confidence in how you show up, where you have real connections with real, like-minded women, and the momentum from that event will carry you forward immediately. What Makes This Different This is an event where you're not just listening (speaker after speaker where you just take notes). You're engaged. With my background in teaching and curriculum development, I always make it where you're engaged with the material and the group. You're being reflective, you're sharing, you're connecting, so you'll leave with fresh perspective and new ideas, but renewed energy from being able to verbalize, to implement, to connect with others on what matters most to you. It's not hype, it's not hustle, it's not pressure. It's focused, grounded, and genuinely energizing. I invite you to attend as my guest. Here are the Event Details: When: January 8 (Thursday), two sessions on the same day Where: North Vancouver, near my home Capacity: Only 10 spots per session Investment: Normally $197, but use the special link to sign up here and your ticket is Diane's gift to you. Just cover the $25 Seat Deposit, and when you attend, you'll receive a book from the Dynamic Women® Secrets Series as your gift. There will be an online version later for those who aren't local. Make sure you sign up for the waitlist. Who Is This For?
You don't need to be ready. You don't need to have all your ducks in a row. You don't need a perfect plan. Just have some curiosity and optimism that you’re going to have a great time and get a lot out of it. Why Is This My Gift? Normally to attend these sessions costs $197 because it's three hours of my time and content. It's like group coaching, strategy and connection together in a beautiful boardroom. But I invite you to pick this up as your gift from me with the special discount code because you read my blogs. Can you bring a friend? If you think they are a good fit (if they have some of these things I've just listed), then share this with them and invite them to come. If you're not sure, reach out to me. Imagine these few intentional hours focused on growth, focused on clarity, focused on connection. It's going to be huge for you. A Powerful Leadership Move Choosing support is a powerful leadership move. Choosing connection is a catalyst for growth. That's how I've been able to move my business forward, by using connection with others, whether it be a coach, a business advisor, other women I collab with, or my clients.  What I want for you is to start the next chapter energized, confident, and supported. Thank you for being part of my world. I invite you to carry forward what resonated from last year and to step into what's next, because it's going to be so exciting. Get Your Ticket Now. The special discount has already been applied. Can't Make It In Person? Join the Waitlist for the online version. I hope you take me up on my invitation to come and hang out with me. Until next time, stay dynamic!
We are a couple of weeks into December, still a ways away from Christmas, but are you already starting to feel overwhelmed? I understand because we, as women, carry the majority of the holiday load. Frankly, we carry the majority of the mental load all year, and it's not because we want to. It's because it's expected, assumed, often invisible, and the only other people who get it are other women carrying this holiday load.  This is not about managing your calendar or finding more time in your day. It's your December Survival Guide, and I am your little elf here to support you so that you can actually feel good this season instead of overwhelmed. You deserve to feel good in December and at Christmas time, not just get through it or survive it. The Reality of December Most women move through December thinking, "I have to get it all done. Where's my list of things to do, my list of things that make magic for my kids, the list of places to go, the list of presents to buy?” There are so many things, and meanwhile, your inner world gets pushed aside, gets forgotten. There's no space for you. This is about reclaiming your calm, your joy, your sanity in a month that easily takes more than it gives. It's not about doing more. I'm not going to tell you any hacks about fitting more in. It's more about choosing differently. The Real Holiday Labor Load The real holiday labour load falls on women. Women take on so much of the emotional labour of the season: managing family dynamics, remembering traditions, making new traditions, maintaining harmony, managing everyone's mood. Women are three times more likely to report feeling overwhelmed by holiday responsibilities. This is why on Mother's Day, women just want to be left alone. We just want no one to need us. It'd be nice if people waited on us hand and foot, if we could just sip a cup of hot coffee or tea, read a book, do what we want to do. All of these facts reinforce something: your exhaustion. It's not personal, it's structural. It's based on how society has been and the expectations that fall on us. What Actually Causes December Overwhelm It's not the decorations (though we're the ones that put them up) or the dinners (though we're often the ones that make it). It's the invisible expectations:
This is where women lose themselves. The December Survival Framework Here's the strategy to help you navigate this month feeling grounded, not drained. 1. Choose the Experience You Want Most people ask, "What do I need to get done this month?" Instead, ask: What do I want December to feel like? Mine was magical and cozy (and with cozy goes calm). Here are some other answers: peaceful, simple, joyful, connected, warm, slow, playful. Let these feelings guide your choices, guide your yeses, and guide what you put in your calendars. 2. Do Less on Purpose Feeling good requires intentional subtraction. In order to feel good, we must intentionally subtract things from our list. I'm intentionally subtracting already in December. Last night, I chose to skip a holiday party and do dinner with my family. Today, I chose to not go to a networking event, but to write this. This intentional subtraction doesn't make you lazy, it makes you wise. Examples of Intentional Subtraction:
You can choose simplicity without choosing guilt. 3. Create a Grounding Ritual Do some sort of grounding ritual every single day at the start of the day to stabilize your entire month:
These small rituals help you regulate your nervous system and maintain peace and calm, so you can stay steady throughout the month. Why Women Struggle to Feel Good There are emotional roots: guilt, obligation, pressure to be the glue in the family, fear of disappointing others, avoiding conflict, and internalized responsibility. I can remember one Christmas, all this pressure for everything. People were complaining about going to church on Christmas Eve, complaining about what we were having to eat. The next morning, I was doing all this dinner prep by myself. I asked for help and no one jumped into action. I started to cry. I turned the stove off and went to my room. I needed a break, a moment where I released all the stress and pressure to make it wonderful. I decided, "Christmas will be what it is."  I came back out, had a real heart-to-heart with my family, and they stepped up. We made it a good day. We can break old family patterns. We maybe want to be that reliable one, that thoughtful one, that one that has everything together, but we don't have to be. Not only that, but we don't have to believe that rest or simplicity makes us selfish or that we don't have time for it, because we do, and we have to prioritize it. What Happens If You Don't If you continue to let the pressure build, let December overwhelm you:
The holidays don't need to feel like a performance. They should be about enjoying the moment and making a memory. You deserve a December that nourishes you, not empties you. Your Feel Good December Plan  Here are three simple, doable, powerful questions: 1. What's the feeling you want to lead with this month? Then make decisions based on that feeling. If it was magic, joy, peace, or calm, ask yourself: Is this thing going to help me get that? 2. What is one thing you're going to do less of? Where can you use strategic elimination or intentional subtraction? What can you take off your plate? 3. What is one ritual you're going to keep daily and weekly? What will help you stay grounded and nourished? These three things are your personal December Survival Guide and really your survival guide anytime you're entering a stressful time. Remember You don't have to earn your rest. You don't have to carry all the responsibility or the mental load. And you don't need a perfect holiday to have a meaningful one. You deserve a December that feels good, not overwhelming. Share this with a friend who needs to hear this message, so they can chill out a little bit and have a great December as well. Until next time, stay dynamic!
Today, I want to talk about how awesome it is to be afraid. Being fearful actually is awesome. Why?  Well, so many people focus on not wanting to be afraid or on how fear is holding them back. But what if fear was telling you that on the other side, there's going to be a great success? Would that make it more enjoyable? Would that give you something to look forward to? Now I'm not talking about the fear of a lion in front of us or the fear of going into a burning building. I'm not talking about danger fear. I'm talking about that fear we have where we're like, "Oh my gosh, I could never email that person and ask them for a coffee date. I could never cold call that customer I really want. I would never want to speak in front of people because I'm scared." Fear Allows Better Celebration Being afraid helps us celebrate better. I was at a workshop about ten years ago, and we were doing the arrow-breaking activity where you put the pointy end on your throat and the feather end on the wall and walk forward. It was quite fearful. A lot of people were even brought to tears in the amount of fear. They were shaking. They really didn't want to do it. Maybe that's how you feel when you do public speaking, too. I had set myself up to control my emotions. I was able to really get into my head and get through the breaking of the arrow, but i was also not very present in my body or in the moment. So what happened when I got to the other side of breaking my arrow? It was pretty anticlimactic. Other people were cheering when they did it. Other people were high-fiving. I almost had to fake that enthusiasm. I feel like I missed out because I didn't allow myself to feel the fear.  In public speaking, I get nervous before I talk. I get nervous before I lead a group of dynamic women. I get nervous and feel fearful and afraid sometimes when I make that big call, when I ask for that client. What I do is I feel the fear and do it anyway. You've probably heard that expression before. What Fear Tells Us What that does for me is it keeps me on my game. It tells me that what I'm doing is so important. It helps me to be prepared rather than be apathetic and not really care about the outcome. Every time I go and present, I think, "Oh, what's this fear telling me?" It's telling me…
The Fear-Celebration Ratio Here's the thing: If your fear is at a higher level, the celebration is going to be at that level. If your fear is at a lower level, the celebration feels at the same lower level. I'm not saying you need to increase your fear. What I'm saying is don't freak out, have the fear, and then do it. Feel the fear, do it anyway, and you'll get a bigger reward. I see this in my clients all the time. When something's easy, we're like, "Oh, whatever, no big deal." But if somebody else were in your shoes, they'd say, "Wow, if I did that, I'd be so scared." That reward you're going to get, that celebration you get, is going to be equal or even more as a reward to facing that fear. What You Need to Do  Get in action. Make it happen. But listen to what the fear is telling you first. Then when you get to the other side, and you've done whatever it is that you were fearful of, celebrate it. Reward yourself. That'll be the motivation for when you face another fear, because your inner self will reassure you saying, "You know what? There's going to be goodness on the other side." Plan Your Celebration Ahead of Time You also get to plan your celebration. For example, "When I give that big presentation, that night I'm going to plan to go out with my girlfriends and share a great meal." Or, "When I do the thing I’m afraid of, then I'm going to the spa." Have something there to pull you through that fear, to motivate you to continue. I hope you'll face it so that reward on the other side is just as juicy as the amount of fear that you had. If you do something and get over your fear and reward yourself, let me know. I'd love to hear about it at [email protected]. Until next time, stay dynamic!
We budget our money with spreadsheets, apps, categories, and more. But time? We spend it like it's completely unlimited. But what if we treated time like our most valuable currency?  I wanted to use the word "invest," instead of "spend" in the title because when we invest money, there's an expected return. Spending feels like squandering. There's no ROI. But I couldn’t use "invest" in the title because I didn't want you to think about investing money in stocks, bonds, and GICs. Time as Investment It’d be great if we stopped spending our time and instead invested it. We do that by allocating it, just like we might allocate our money in a budget. When we put our money into something, we're looking for:
Every hour of our day has a strong ROI if we use it wisely. If we invest our time, we can use it to make money, boost our energy, and build stronger relationships; but when we spend time, it will drain us. Asking if the way we use our time boosts or drains us:
You could stop reading right now and just take that as the point, because it's a different way of thinking. We shouldn't give our money to software we're not using or subscriptions we're not using. A lot of times we unconsciously allocate our time to things that really aren't beneficial. The Cost of Reactivity Entrepreneurs spend a lot of their time being reactive to situations, and context switching. Even right before I recorded this, I was jumping between tasks and was like, "Stop it. Stop waiting for the person to reply. Set up a time to actually talk to them." That reactivity and context switching are actually causing entrepreneurs to lose 32% of their week. That's like a third of your time wasted that could be used more efficiently. It often hurts for us to waste our money, but it doesn't always hurt for us to waste our time. We don't see it in the same way. We're not just going to throw our money away, but we throw away our time on things like doom-scrolling or procrastination. Time budgeting, just like financial budgeting, helps you to have these five benefits:
Why Aren't People Doing This? 1. Guilt of Saying No: We'll say no to something financial because we know we maybe can't afford it or don't want to put our money towards something, and most of the time we're not embarrassed by that. We get to choose a luxury vehicle or something reliable and price conscious. We're not going to apologize to people buying one over the other. But we have a lot of guilt in saying no to something when it involves our time. If we have time, we feel like we should give it freely. People don't necessarily know how much money we have, so they're not always asking us to give that freely, but sometimes they make their own judgment on how much time we have and how much time we can give. 2. Thinking that Being Busy Equals Being Valuable: If we're thinking about being busy, we give away our time. Instead, we can think about our time being valuable, then we will invest our time on what matters to reach our goals and build relationships. 3. Reactivity Disguised as Responsibility: "I gotta deal with this. I gotta deal with this," rather than checking in and being like, "Is this a priority for me? Is this important for me?" I heard a funny expression on a show: "Not my sink, not my dishes." You don't have to wash someone else's dishes if it's not your sink. We're often put into situations where we give so much of our time to help others without actually seeing the value. The Problems When Time Is Ignored 
What Can You Do?  If you know that time is a resource, just like money is a resource, figure out how much time you have. 1. Assess Your Time: How much of my time is flexible that I can decide what happens with it? How much of my time is constricted? Like if I'm at a nine-to-five, from nine to five I only have the hour in the middle of the day that's mine, or I have the start of the day that's mine, but then I have kids at this hour. Figure out how much you have. That's usually what a financial advisor does, right? They figure out how much money you have, then you can invest it wisely. 2. Do an Audit: Look at last week and ask yourself: Where did I spend my time, and where did I invest my time, and where did I waste my time? Invest, spend, and waste. Categorize each activity towards things that are leaking your energy, draining your energy, or giving you a really high ROI. 3. Optimize High ROI Activities: Maybe an area is good, but could it be better? Could it be better if you give more time or even less time? Is there a difference between a three-hour hangout with a friend and a one-hour hangout? Could you do the one-hour hangout more often? Is three hours too much? Could you meet in the middle rather than driving the full distance? Would that be supportive of your time? 4. Reallocate Saved Time: Find one spot where you can save some time, then make sure you're allocating it to something that's a value to you. Don't find an hour and then allocate it to doom-scrolling, Netflix, or procrastinating. Actually do something that moves your needle forward and helps you achieve your goals and be happier. Invest your hours like they matter, because they do. The moment you start treating your time as currency, everything from your confidence to your results begins to shift. When you choose where your time goes, you take ownership of the life you’re creating. Until next time, stay dynamic!
(Sidenote: This blog is based on a video I recorded 11 years ago when my business was really young and I had two kids under three. Life was a very different kind of busy.)  I have felt jealousy and envy. Many times. How about you? Have you ever looked at a competitor, a colleague, a stranger online, or even someone close to you and felt that tight little pull in your chest? Think of a person right now you’ve felt a little envious of. What triggered it? Maybe it was… • Something they achieved • Something they bought • An opportunity they landed • A relationship • Their energy • Their looks • A part of their personality • Their lifestyle • Their job For me, it has been all kinds of things at different points. Years ago, I remember noticing someone on social media doing work similar to mine - coaching. And it hit me hard. I loved how she was running her business. I loved her confidence, her consistency, her presence. Then came the drop. “Why can’t I do that? Why isn’t it happening for me? That’s how I want things to look.” Have you felt that? The mix of admiration, frustration, and self-judgment. It is not fun to admit. But it is human. And social media makes it even harder. We’re no longer comparing ourselves to people in our real lives. We’re comparing ourselves to thousands of highlight reels. Perfect lighting. Perfect captions. Perfect timing. One scroll, and suddenly you’re doubting your progress, your pace, your decisions, even your identity. Even when we know it’s curated, our brains still treat it like the full picture.  During all this, my business advisor said something that snapped me back to reality. She reminded me that the woman I was comparing myself to was further along in her business, wasn’t married, had no kids, and had endless hours to pour into her brand. Meanwhile, I had two kids under three, a growing business, and a few precious part-time hours to build an empire. No wonder it didn’t look the same. No wonder the timelines were different. That perspective grounded me. It reminded me that context matters. Life stage matters. The weight you’re carrying matters. You cannot compare your full, busy, beautiful real life to someone else’s single-focus schedule or their polished online presence. Two Ways to Respond Some people shut down when jealousy hits. They think, “Well, someone already did it. Too late for me.” Or even, “They took my idea.” The other option is to use it. - To let it spark something. - To think, “Thank you for showing me what I want.” Back then, I didn’t choose the spark right away. I got annoyed. I fell into comparison. My saboteur sharpened its claws. It slowed me down. But looking back, most of the people I envied had more years in the game, more support, or just a clearer runway. And I, meanwhile, was doing my best in a season that required gentleness, not power drive. I just couldn’t see it at the time. The Mirror Lesson At one point, I opened up to someone about how embarrassed I felt about my jealousy. The advice was simple, and it stuck with me. People show up in your life for two reasons. They either hold up a mirror and show you something you need to see, or they’re someone you’re meant to help. This person was definitely holding up a mirror. And once I saw that, the whole thing shifted.  She wasn’t ahead of me. She wasn’t better than me. She was simply reflecting a version of me I hadn’t stepped into yet. And if I were telling this story today, I’d add one more thing. Sometimes people appear in your life to wake you up. To shake you out of autopilot. To make you look straight at the dream you’ve been tiptoeing around. Your Turn The next time jealousy hits, don’t judge yourself. It’s normal. Just don’t let it drag you down. Don’t let your inner saboteurs claw at your confidence. Let the feeling fuel you instead. Thank the person silently for the clarity. You don’t have to call them and say, “Thanks for sharing the photo of your new car” or “Thanks for sharing your flashy new website.” Just acknowledge the lesson and return to yourself. Then ask, “Now what am I going to do with this information?” Envy and jealousy like other emotions are just information. Let it raise your game. And let it point you toward what you truly want. Because envy usually shows up when you’re ready for your next level.
I know there are people right now who feel drained, tired, flat, and experience friction in life. So I'm pulling back the curtain on my one-woman show. I want to share my journey with you and how it's unexpectedly giving me more energy and happiness. Even though it's a bit of a stretch and honestly a little scary, it's recharging me in a way that no business strategy ever could. This blog isn't about time management or self-care because what I've discovered is that true energy doesn't just come from rest. It comes from deep alignment, expression, and this coaching term: “resonance”. Meaning to be in energy. Side Note: Join Behind the Curtain I started a Facebook group called Behind the Curtain with Diane Rolston. It's free. Jump in, and I'm going to share more tidbits, the actual nuts and bolts of me doing the new woman show. I might even come to you like a board of directors and ask questions I'm not sure about. You'll get other secrets and tips and be the first to know when the preview of the one-woman show is going to happen.  Resonance as Real Fuel There are tasks I have to do in business and life that I don't want to do that I can't even delegate to my virtual assistants. They can rob my energy. In comparison, when I do things that are more aligned to what I'm currently needing, or more aligned to my values, it gives me energy. It's this lightness, this bouncy feeling, and it helps me stay true to who I am, or at this moment, who I feel called to be, and what I feel called to say. When you do what resonates with you, something in alignment that honours your values, you're going to feel energy, ease, and flow. It's about choosing to do these things, not just what impresses people, not just what you should do, not just what pleases others, and definitely not things that dishonor your values. When you actually do things in alignment for you, your energy doesn't just grow or show up, it multiplies. My Counseling Session Revelation I was in the middle of a counseling session (I'm doing some counseling to clear out and process old emotions around my dad's death, trauma over the years, just things you keep pushing down). I'd been feeling down about some health stuff, and then I started talking about this one-woman show, and I got animated. These are ways you show you’re in resonance and feeling that alignment:
That's when I realized, "Wow, I'm in resonance right now." My counsellor said, "Whoa. That was a shift." This was the realization: I need to be more in this. I'm in the right place, and it's good for me. True energy doesn't come from just doing more (we can always do more, we can always add to our schedules, please don't). It comes from doing what aligns with your values, your purpose, and your joy. If you don't know your values, send me an email: [email protected]. I can do a values session where you find your values, see if you're honouring or dishonouring them, and put a plan in place so you can feel this energy all the time. Resonance is that feeling of "this fits, this is me, this is where I'm supposed to be." When your actions match your values, you create energy —like throwing kerosene on a fire —rather than pouring water on it, taking away its power and energy. Dissonance: The Opposite Dissonance is the opposite. It's hard, like pushing a rock up a hill. There's friction; it's draining, and you dread it —maybe even avoid it.  When you're doing something that deeply matters to you, like my creative work on this one-woman show, I can work for hours and still feel alive. Maybe you've felt that way:
When you're out of alignment, even the smallest task feels heavy. The worst part is you start trying to get yourself to do more, do it better, thinking something's wrong with you, but really you're just out of alignment and out of resonance. The Science Behind It Studies show that when you live in alignment with your core values, you experience higher motivation, stronger emotional resilience, and 20% more daily energy. When I talk about this and people ask, "What's new?" and I say, "I'm writing a one-woman show," I get giddy and excited. It's like, I'm sharing that I'm going on vacation." Alignment isn't a mindset trick like saying 10 affirmations. It's actually biological. When your actions match your purpose, your nervous system relaxes, your creativity increases, and you restore energy while doing the work. If you're in dissonance and energy is being drained, it's hard, negative, you dread it, and your nervous system gets tense like waiting in a really long lineup to pay a bill, or doing taxes or another task you hate. The Benefits of Resonance
 This is what I've been experiencing as I write my show. Yes, there are hard times. I'm not inherently a writer. I don't know how to write scripts. I'm learning dialog. My writing coach keeps saying, "Diane, you just wrote a great speech. Now we have to bring it to the stage." I'm having to learn and rewire my brain, but this fulfillment creates energy. Rather than feeling like I have a learning gap, I'm like a sponge. Why Alignment Feels Hard It's not always easy to say yes to things. In your business or life, there are things that create resonance and things that create dissonance. 1. Society's Expectations: Maybe you have a nine-to-five or a business different from your hobbies or passions. It goes against what society thinks we should be spending our time and money on. I've had clients say, "Diane, I don't want a promotion. I don't want to build my business. Is it wrong that I just want to be at home and make crafts with my kids and feed them grilled cheese sandwiches?" I reassure them, "No, not if that’s your dream and ideal life." All the tasks we do, all the ways we choose to spend our time, and the goals we have don't need to be what society deems as success. We shouldn’t say yes to things that don't match our values, but we do it to keep the peace, keep up with the Joneses, because we feel we should, or because others around us are doing it. 2. Staying in Obligations That Don't Fit: I remember being part of a networking group with amazing people, but 60-70% served the senior market. My business advisor asked, "Is this serving your business?" I said, "Well, no, but they're good people." He said, "How often are you seeing your friends?" and "You don't need to stay in a group that no longer serves you." 3. Confusing Productivity with Purpose: We're doing more, but feeling less. We're in less resonance, less energy, and have less motivation. As overachieving women, we override our inner signals saying "Don't do this." We say yes to things that don't serve us and push through even when something feels off. Your body and your energy always tell the truth when you're out of alignment. Have you been invited somewhere and hesitated to say yes? That's you saying you don't want to go. If you wanted to go, your energy would be like "Yes, yes." I was speaking to a theater about their artists’ hub program. At first, I thought, "Is it too much work? Too much commitment? Am I already so far in my business that I'd be around younger or newer people?" But when I got off that call, I was so excited. I was like, "Who can I tell?" So I knew that was a yes. If you hesitate or start to feel exhausted, irritated, or lack motivation, it's not in alignment. The Cost of Misalignment When you're in misalignment, in dissonance, it doesn't just drain energy, it dulls your joy. I've seen clients come to me living in black and white, but when you live in alignment, in resonance, your color comes back. Like the start of The Wizard of Oz when everything's in black and white, then all of a sudden comes to colour. High-achieving women, successful women, will work harder when they feel unhappy or that something's missing, but it doesn’t help they just feel emptier and more tired. You get to a point where you don't even know why you started. You don't have clarity. You slowly start living a version of success that only looks good on paper but doesn't feel good inside. That's why I had to leave corporate. My life looked so good on paper, and that's why I held on for so long. I was measuring life according to success - and it looked good. I wasn't measuring my life according to satisfaction, or even giving satisfaction, resonance, or alignment any space because I didn't know about them. Your Alignment Check
That little voice, your alignment, the resonance, the energy, that's a compass for where you should go. You don't have to have it all figured out. Just take the next step. The more you listen to it, the more natural energy and joy you're going to create, even if it's just "I'd like to paint a picture" or "I want to organize my closets." If those things bring you joy, happiness, resonance… amazing. Go do them. When you honour what resonates in your life and work, things feel easy, not a grind. There's that flow. Join Me One more invite to join me in the Behind the Curtain Facebook group. If you want to explore this topic more, email me: [email protected]. Let's talk about getting you into more resonance. If you have a few questions you want to run by me, I'm doing a Mastermind Q&A session on November 14, from 9 to 11 AM PST. It's a mastermind where you ask and I answer, or you can bring your goals, and we can strategize and map out the next steps. Final Thoughts I've learned that energy isn't something you chase or schedule. It's cultivated, it's birthed, and it grows through alignment and being in resonance. The more you live, work, and create in resonance with your truth, the more energy and fulfillment you'll have, not only in your own life but to lead others. That's how I'm gaining energy right now, writing my one-woman show. I just got accepted to the artists’ program at a local theatre, and I'm so pumped. I'm doing something in resonance and giving me energy, but also something that scares me a little, stretches me a little, but at the end of the day feels so deeply aligned. I want the same for you. Until next time, stay dynamic!
Every successful woman eventually faces fear, but not the kind that stops you. The kind that signals growth. A lot of times, we think of it as a negative thing, but it's actually saying you are expanding. Right now, I'm doing something completely new: writing and performing a one-woman show. Honestly, it's equal parts terrifying and thrilling. As I got off a recent Zoom meeting with my one-woman-show coach, it made me think. Whether you're scaling your business, stepping out on stage as a speaker, or finally launching that next big idea, product, or book, growth always comes with a little fear.  In this blog, I'm sharing how high-achieving women like us can use fear as fuel, not a stop sign. We're going to use it as a way to step into bigger confidence, bigger creativity, and more impact in the world. The Comfort Crossroad Even though I've spoken on hundreds of stages to massive audiences and published podcasts, books and blogs, writing this one-woman show then performing it as an actor putting feels raw, personal, and it's stretching me. Every successful woman hits this crossroad where comfort feels safe and nice, but it also feels small, and you're craving something more. That was the spark I needed for writing my own one-woman show. I needed that expansiveness. For women entrepreneurs and leaders, growth doesn't just come from more strategy, more work, more hours. It comes from courage, and it's going to give you some really great stories. If you've been playing it safe recently, this is your reminder. Your next level is waiting on the other side of what scares you. Fear Is a Sign of Expansion Fear means you're in new territory. As you start to leave your bubble of comfort into something new, your inner self says, "Danger. Fear means stop. Fear means we're in trouble." But actually, you can't grow and expand without fear. Fear is telling us we're going out of that zone, but you're safe, you're okay. Just because it can feel scary doing the show, and it's an industry I don't know, it doesn't mean I'm failing. It means I'm expanding. When you're growing your muscles and there's a little pain, it doesn't mean it's a bad thing. It means there's been growth and progress. The show terrifies me in the best way.
But that's how I know this is the right next thing: I care, and it's helping me feel alive rather than apathetic or complacent, which happens when high achievers reach that peak of success. Fear is proof you're stepping into unfamiliar territory, and it’s good because that's where the next level lies. The Science Behind Fear Did you know that moderate fear actually increases your focus, creativity, and motivation? When you're in that heightened state, it pushes you into higher performance. You know that feeling right before you have to be “on”, or right before an interview?  Being scared is just the next step. Rather than being a red flag, it's actually a green light saying, "Go, move forward. This is good for you" because it's building your confidence mindset and it's leadership development. You're learning to regulate that fear, building emotional mastery and resilience. I'm not saying that tomorrow I'm going to fill a 700-person theater and pitch to Netflix. I'm doing the steps that make sense for where I'm at. Meeting Your Inner Critic When I first sat down to start writing part of my show, my inner critic was super loud. "Who are you to do this? What if it's not good? How are you going to fill a theater?" Then I realized this voice shows up when I'm doing something new, something that matters, something that stretches me. Those saboteurs start barking and saying stupid things that aren't true, but we can pull some truth nuggets from them.
Every time I get on stage, I still feel a bit of that fear. A speaking colleague told me yesterday, "Before I get on stage, every time I feel a little bit nervous." Feel the fear and do it anyway. Fear isn’t a stop sign. It's just a signal that you're standing on the edge of your next breakthrough. The Benefits of Facing Fear
My One-Woman Show Journey I had this spark after seeing a fellow Canadian Association of Professional Speakers member do her keynote in a theater. It seemed more as a show than a talk. Another member went on tour and built cool promo assets. At the Global Speakers Summit in Bali, one speaker wore costumes and developed this world. I thought, "This is exactly what I want to do." Since then, I've taken a one-person show class, and two writing courses. This week I spoke to a local theater and will probably join their artists' community for a year. Hopefully late January, early February, I'll do my first Show Preview. If you want more updates about my one-woman show journey, join my Facebook group. I’d very much appreciate your support.  Why We Avoid Fear
Many high-achieving women unconsciously trade expansion for comfort, especially with kids, aging parents, and everything else. But safety and stagnation can feel almost identical. The Problems If We Stay Comfortable
Permission to Pursue What Scares You I got to the point where I was talking with my business coaches about the next offering, what I'm marketing, what I'm selling. I said, "I don't know. What I want to do is just write my show. I don't want to do all those other things right now." Permission granted for me to write my show and perform it, and for you to do the same. Your Challenge Don't wait. Do the thing that scares you. Send the pitch, raise your rates, share the post, make the video. Say yes to an opportunity that makes your stomach flip. Invite a new friend out. Go on a date. Take your spouse on a date. Take a class you've been wanting to take: painting, music, dance, whatever it may be. Fear isn't failure. It's feedback that you're evolving, and we want to evolve to be satisfied in life. For every entrepreneur, high achiever, and leader reading this blog, your next level of confidence and creativity is waiting on the other side of discomfort. Final Thoughts Remember, fear isn't failure. It's feedback that you're expanding because you can't evolve and stay comfortable at the same time. That's where the magic happens. Fear doesn't mean you're off track. It means you're alive, awake, and in motion. Do that thing that scares you, not because you're fearless, but because you're ready for what's next, and you want that growth. Growth will always ask for just a little bit of fear, and that's how you know it's worth it. If this message spoke to you, let me know. Send me a message: [email protected] or on your favorite social platform. Share this with another powerful woman who's ready to grow, or who wants more courage. Until next time, stay dynamic!
Have you ever looked back on something you did in the past and thought, “Who was I then? How was I so confident, yet so naive—or so new and fresh at what I was doing?” The truth is, you achieved it because you decided to be confident—or whatever quality you needed at that moment. Your identity drives your success, habits, energy, visibility, and results.  Because you don’t get what you want. You get what you believe you are. And that’s what we’re diving into today: confidence and identity shifts for female entrepreneurs. The Chicken and the Egg Do you become confident because you’ve done the things, or do you first decide to be confident and then achieve? In high school, I decided I’d be the graduation MC. My mom said, “I don’t understand how you could ever do that.” But I thought, I’ve never done it… I’ll just step into the role. Being naive meant I had fewer expectations. I didn’t need to know how to do it or even expect a great result. I just gave it a try and loved it. Same thing with rugby. As a rookie varsity kicker with everyone watching, I had to walk up like I was confident. At that level, every kick could win or lose the game. So I became the person who would do well and thankfully, I kicked 7 for 7 in that first university game. Your Reflection Point As you read this, ask yourself - Where can you choose to be more confident? - Where can you be more of who you want to be (the person who wins)? I’m going to share the benefits, obstacles, and problems if ignored and a call to action you can implement in your life, business, or career. From Faking It to Owning It This idea that you can actually be the person who does something, who wins, who's confident before you achieve it. That's the whole idea of faking it till you make it. But instead of faking it, you're going to actually own that quality. Whatever you need to do to be able to own that quality, it's actually going to help you more so than actually doing the task, because it's going to help you to get into a place of ‘being’ when you go to do the ‘doing’. The Benefits
A Quick Fact: Identity-based habits (who you see yourself as) are three times more likely to stick than outcome-based goals. Believing "I am a healthy person" works better than "I will do healthy habits." Believing in who you are matters way more than the plan of what to do. Many clients say, "I just don't know why I'm not motivated to do these things," or "I feel like an imposter." These feelings happen even as we reach new levels of success. But if you anchor into who you believe you are—and act from that identity—you’ll see greater results. The Obstacles 1. Waiting to Feel Ready: A client once told me, “I don’t feel like an author.” The funny part? She’d already published a book. Another said, “I’ll launch my program after a few more courses.” I reminded her, “If I booked you for a talk tomorrow, you could deliver eight workshops right now.” She laughed and said, “You’re right. 2. Letting Old Stories Define New Opportunities: We focus on actions and outcomes instead of who we are being.
If you’ve never done something before, look at other times you faced fear and succeeded. Transfer that strength forward. 3. Playing Small to Seem Relatable or Likable: High-achieving women… this one’s for you. We often play small to avoid making others feel insecure or jealous. We downplay compliments: “Oh, this old thing?” But doing that hides your brilliance. You don’t need to dim your light to make others comfortable. The Problems If Ignored 
 One Last Story I have been very grateful that I have been given some naive confidence at some parts in my life. I've also been very blessed to have a mother and a father, who believed in me so much. My Mom would say, "You can do it." I would be in times in my life where I'd lack confidence, saying, "I can't do this." And then I'd change my thoughts, "No, but mom says I can. I don't know how, but mom believes I can, therefore I can." I've just stepped into that false confidence, almost that inflated-by-somebody-else confidence, and I've stepped up. Still, I’ve had moments where I downplayed my expertise, stayed quiet, or acted like a student instead of a leader. Even though other times, I stepped up and showed who I truly am. It's not always easy. I get it. It's not always easy to be confident. But could you pick that you are going to be the woman who wins? Can you? Someone's got to win. So could it be you? It totally could be. Your Call to Action I want you to finish this line. Maybe "win" or "confident" aren't words for you. But if you were to finish the statement, "I am the woman who..." and you add in an adjective. Is it…
"I am the woman who..." How would you fill that in? I'm really curious. Let me know. Email me: [email protected], or comment below. What would it be like if, after you made that statement, "I am the woman who...," you started acting like her today? Not once it's proven, not once you say, "Oh, okay, I am a woman who's confident because I did X, Y, Z," but just decide that you're going to be it. I promise you that if we spent a little time together, I could probably find many instances where you have been these things, and we could easily transfer them over, because honestly, waiting for the actions to happen is going to be much harder than just deciding today to be that woman. Identity precedes action. You got this! If you haven't yet, share this with a friend. The next bunch of blogs that I have coming up are bolder. They're more powerful. I was in this energy for a while of really wanting to speak to you in those moments of obstacle and hardship and overwhelm and not feeling like yourself and things not going your way. Now we're on the up. Now we're in this area of more boldness, more power, more being unapologetic, stepping into that motivation, that inspiration to get you moving towards your goals. I just brought on a few new clients, though I do have two more spots for one-on-one coaching clients. If this is something that you have been pondering, or you're curious about, email me: [email protected] and let's have a chat. Until next time, stay dynamic!
Did you know that in business and life, not every season is meant to be a sprint? Sometimes, maintaining is the smartest move you can make. But so many of us high achievers equate slowing down with falling behind. So ask yourself: What if holding steady was actually part of your growth strategy?  In this blog, I’m discussing a topic that every business owner and professional woman faces, but we don't plan for: determining whether you're in momentum season or maintenance season. My Personal Wake-Up Call I remember after my dad passed, I really should have been in full-blown maintenance season. Maintenance season is the time when you hold back, maybe put stuff in place behind the scenes, and you're juggling fewer balls or maybe less in the public eye. Momentum season is when you're moving forward, pushing, doing a lot, putting out more energy, and maybe you're in the public eye more. I really should have been behind the scenes. We were putting together the Confidence Secrets book, the second in the Dynamic Women book series. I had so many authors in it and wanted to get more authors. I can remember not having the energy or desire or excitement anymore to fill the last spots. I said to one of my business coaches, "But I'm only at 34 authors and I need to get 52." He was like, "Who said you need to get 52?" I replied, "Well, that's what we did in the first book, Success Secrets, and I wanted to do the same." "Well, do you have to do that? Can you still create a really good book with 34 people?" "Yeah, I could. I guess to make it bigger, I could add in more of my own stuff." He asked, "Yeah, why don't you do that? What would it take for you to muster the energy to be able to fill the rest of the book?" "I just don't have it in me." He said, "That's totally fine. Just put it out the way it is. You didn't promise your authors to have 52 people. Who made that rule? You did. So you can change it." I was so appreciative of that moment because I felt pressure in a maintenance season to do more and to push and to kind of have momentum. But I realized my energy and my ability to perform at that time. I couldn't do it. This wasn't failure, it was wisdom, thanks to my coach, I needed to really honor that maintenance season. Understanding the Two Seasons Momentum seasons and maintenance seasons are both essential for long-term success in business and life. The problem is, society glorifies momentum, and we shame maintenance. We shame people when they're not doing crazy things. Even, "What's new?" That's a momentum question, along with when people ask you that, "What's new and exciting?" I've been guilty of asking that of people. The idea of honouring maintenance, of being in that place of "I just need to keep it together" or "I just need to do some stuff behind the scenes", it's not necessarily growth, but it's keeping things as they are, or maybe even improving things behind the scenes. Maintenance is where systems are strengthened, creativity recharges, and your success becomes more sustainable because you have things in place that are going to help you get further. Knowing what season you're in is crucial, not only so that you can make decisions, but so that you can own it and give yourself permission to either go for it or take a break. And that's going to prevent burnout. It's also going to prevent guilt. The Marathon Runner Example One of my soccer teammates runs marathons, and after she did the actual race where she had a personal best, she said to us, "Hey, I can't make practice because I just did a marathon." When I asked a member of my Kenya Mission Team who's a marathon runner how many races she does a year, she said, "Two to four, maybe." I was like, "Oh, because they're expensive to go to?" She said, "No, no. The sweet spot is typically two to four marathons per year that allows enough time for recovery or maintenance and then proper training between the races, the momentum stage."  Even just doing two a year, spaced out six months apart, is a really common and manageable goal for runners. She had a personal best because she was honoring recovery days, the maintenance mode, so that her muscles could rebuild. Business and life are so much the same. Two to four major goals or projects per year, personally or in business, is the momentum stage. Depending on if there's one massive thing, then maybe it's just one big thing. The cool fact is that companies that actually strategically pause, just like the runners, who decide they’re only going to do two to four major launches, product drops, summits, book launches, whatever it may be. Those who strategically pause to consolidate, to build those systems, they actually outperform those companies who consistently chase that growth, who are in momentum all the time, by 30% over five years. It's proof that the stillness needs to happen. The strategy is best to be able to have that constant burst and pause, rather than constant acceleration. The Benefits of Embracing Your Season What are the benefits of embracing the season that you're in? Whether it's maintenance or momentum, it doesn't matter. The most important thing is you want to align your effort with your reality, because when you do, you're going to gain so many things.
My Business Example In one maintenance season for me, the business Virtual Assistant Made Easy had massive growth. We were at 50 clients, 16 VAs, and I hadn't done much coaching, workshops or speaking engagements for a while because I was so focused on building that business. Then I was like, "Okay, no, no more. We have to stop this momentum. It's too crazy. I'm always trying to catch up and trying to put the systems in place." I just said, "I have to get out of momentum, and go into maintenance." So I did a hiring freeze. I didn't hire any VAs for probably a year because when I have a VA, I am responsible for filling their client list. So I thought, "No, I'm not going to do that. I'm going to focus on refining our systems: hiring systems, training systems, client systems, onboarding systems etc., instead of adding more clients." It was great, and it was good for my team too, just to give them some time to catch up. That season, I didn't grow my revenue beyond where it was, but I doubled my capacity later because we were able to automate more things. I was able to teach or train and pass off more things. Maintenance, in this case, created the structure for the momentum, for that next wave of momentum when it came. Why We Resist Maintenance There are obstacles and reasons why we resist it:
What Happens If You Ignore Your Season If you don't understand your maintenance, if you don't recognize the true season that you're in, and you stay in momentum for too long: 
Once, I had back-to-back launches that looked successful from the outside, but internally, it was chaos. I wasn't in maintenance mode long enough to get my systems fully ready. The next time I paused, fixed the processes, trained the team, and the next launch ran like clockwork. That's the power of maintenance. Your Action Step Ask yourself right now: Are you in maintenance season, or are you in momentum season? Be honest. Don't be idealistic. If you're in momentum, go all in. Do it, but protect your energy so you don't burn out. That'd be like that marathon runner trying to sprint the whole race. If you're in maintenance mode, honour it. Use the time to rebuild, to recharge, and to strengthen your foundation, not only in your business, but in your life. Either way, there's no shame. They’re both strategic. Both seasons matter, just like the seasons in nature. We don't get mad in Autumn because the trees aren’t growing fruit and the leaves are falling. Remember, growth isn't just about acceleration. It's also about knowing when to slow down so that you can rise stronger later. Until next time, stay dynamic!
Do you believe that even the strongest women need support? I'm guessing you do because you're probably a strong, high-achieving woman yourself. October 10th was World Mental Health Day, and I want to talk about a group of women who are often overlooked: the mental health of high-achieving women who seem to have it all together.  The Invisible Load High-achieving women are the ones everyone relies on: the leaders, the fixers, the steady ones, the smart ones, the successful ones, the caring ones. But sometimes those same women are quietly carrying the heaviest load. That's because people come to us as the fixers and problem solvers. As the leaders, our followers come to us. As the steady ones, people know they can rely on us. There's that saying: "If you want something done, give it to a busy person." Oftentimes, the high achiever is the one getting everything done, but suffering silently. When was the last time you were asked how you're really doing, and the person was ready for the real answer? Not "How is your business doing?" or "How is your family doing?" but "How are YOU doing?" I know what it's like to look like you have it all together, so people don't bother asking you how you're doing, while still feeling so overwhelmed behind the scenes. Sometimes when I visit my naturopath, and she asks, "How are you doing?" in that caring way, it brings tears to my eyes. Just that feeling of someone creating time and space who actually cares about the answer. Don't get me wrong, I have great friends. But people think that because we have things put together, and we're strong, confident, and outgoing, that we're fine. We've seen it in the public eye: those who seem most gregarious, strong, successful, and funny are often struggling the most. Mental health struggles don't skip the strong. Often the most capable women are carrying the most pressure and feel the least permission to ask for help. Even when we’re sick, we still have to do a ton of stuff to do because of how others view us. "Mom can work through it", “the boss can still get it done” or "my wife can work through it," while others get to be out sick. We don't have as much permission to ask for help because, being the high achiever at the top, there's not enough room for it. Strength and Struggle Can Coexist Strength and struggle can absolutely coexist. We can look like we have it all together and be completely falling apart behind the scenes. It's not that it's a mask, it's survival: doing the things that need to be done while potentially pushing down emotions when there's no time, space, or people to talk to. If this is you, make sure you have a great coach, counselor, or support system so you do have time, space, and someone supportive to help you. Asking for help doesn't make you weak. It makes you wise. It helps you move forward, get over the things that are happening, and feel witnessed, seen, and supported, which is crucial to continuing to do what you do. My Personal Struggles I remember lying in bed nursing my first baby when the cat came up and rubbed on me, and I started to cry. My husband ran in: "Are you okay?" I said, "Yes, it's just that the cat wants me to pet her, and baby wants me to nurse her, and you want to hang out with me, and my clients are messaging me." I was an absolute mess. Until then, he thought everything was fine. I realized later I was sleep-deprived and had postpartum depression, though I didn't think I did because the typical questions they ask didn't apply to me. But there have been other times when I've juggled everything: my coaching business, VA Made Easy business, a book launch, coaching clients, parenting, playing soccer, being a wife, my house. I kept telling myself, "I'll just push through until things slow down." When people asked me to do more, I'd say I was busy, and they wouldn't believe me saying, "Well everyone's busy." I thought things would just slow down, but they never did. I've had times when I've struggled mentally, not just postpartum depression or situational grief after my father's passing, but genuine mental health struggles in my adulthood. Finally, what helped was admitting how tired I was, admitting I couldn't do it all, and that I needed my team and family to take on more. The moment I did, I felt relief and hope, and my stress dropped. The business didn't crumble when I slowed down. My family didn't struggle when I did less around the house. Things actually got stronger because I was stronger. The Research Research shows that higher-performing women report higher rates of anxiety and burnout than men in similar roles. We're very emotionally intelligent, but we carry both the visible work and the invisible workload: emotional labor, family logistics, planning.  How many tabs do you have open right now? Not just on your computer, but in your head. Where are the kids? What's for dinner? Do I need to flip that laundry, I need to call my friend, order that birthday present, make those plans. That's just life, not even business. Beyond Basic Self-Care For years, I thought self-care was grabbing a five-minute shower between calls, treating myself to coffee on the run, or going for a walk before my day starts. But really, mental health isn't just about physical rest. It's about giving yourself permission to stop pretending you're fine when you're not. The problem with society is we don't pause long enough after asking, "How are you doing?" We're looking for that automatic, quick answer so we can get on with the conversation. But when someone sits there and says, "How are you doing? How are things going?" and maybe speaks truth into it ("Your life seems really busy right now"), that creates space to open up. The Benefits of Opening Up 1. We Normalize That It's Okay Not Be Okay You don't have to pretend. With high achievers, there's often no time to not be okay, and we just move on to the next thing. People expect us to put on our big girl panties, pull up our bootstraps, and keep going. 2. We Create Connection You won't feel alone in your struggle. When someone tells you about their struggle, don't try to one-up them. Listen. You can relate, but be supportive: "That's hard, but I'm here for you." 3. We Catch Burnout Early I've had clients come to me after burnout or on the verge of burnout. We want to catch it before. Talking about it helps you release stress and create solutions: time, boundaries, priority setting. 4. We Strengthen Relationships Through Honesty Some of my best relationships formed in the hardest times. Sharing what I'm going through has helped people hear my vulnerability, know me as me, and see the real version, not the polished one. A Lesson from Kenya Earlier this year in Kenya, I was surrounded by incredible women and men doing powerful work. Even in service of others, they prioritized connection, rest, and faith. Every day around 10:30 or 11 am, we'd pause for tea and sweet bread or samosas. It wasn't a quick 15 minutes. It was time to enjoy and have camaraderie. Community supports mental health. While we may be leaders and solo sprinters, we're not meant to do life, business, family, or parenting alone. Why High Achievers Don't Speak Up - Four inner voices that stop us… 1. Fear of Judgment "What if they think I can't handle my job, my leadership position, my board post, and they take it away?"  2. Perfectionism "Strong women don't struggle. High achievers are succeeding. We don't have problems. Just figure it out." 3. Responsibility Overload "Everyone's counting on me. There's no way I can take a break, say no, or miss the deadline." 4. Conditioning "Keep going no matter what." I've played sports with broken fingers, broken toes, and sprained ankles. We tape it up and truck on. It's the same with mental health: we slap an invisible band-aid on and keep going. The trouble is, it's like a geyser. We push it down and down until it blows at an unexpected time. The Soccer Story I'm known as the encourager on my soccer team: "Good job! Good pass! Awesome!" I'm cheering everyone on, positive and optimistic. But one night after practice, my face went neutral, and someone asked, "Are you okay?" I almost cried. No one had really asked me for weeks. I could hear in her voice, her tone, her facial expressions that she was concerned. How often are strong women asked if they're okay? People assume we're fine because we make it look easy. What Happens When We Ignore It 1. Burnout - You run out of emotional fuel. 2. Isolation - You feel disconnected, even in a crowd, with your team, or with friends. 3. Decreased Performance - Your creativity and focus fade. High achievers should care about this one. 4. Resentment - Everything feels like "I have to do this" instead of "I want to do this." Do you lie awake at night with your brain replaying things you have to do or things that happened? I've had times in bed when I couldn't rest because there was so much going on, like old cinema reels flipping images through my mind. Your Call to Action This week has a double focus: 1. Check in on the strongest women (and men) you know. Ask them how they're really doing. You'll know if they give you a polished answer or the real one. If they say "Oh you know busy" or "I'm okay," say, "No, how are you really doing?" 2. If you are the strong one, the go-to, the reliable one, it's your turn to reach out. Tell someone you're struggling if you are. Say, "I just want to talk about how hard life is right now" or "Can I share something that's on my mind?" Talk to a friend, coach, or counselor. Book a session. Pray. Journal. Whatever helps you release the mental load. The Bottom Line Mental health isn't just about one day on October 10th. Mental health isn't a luxury; it's a foundation for everything else we need. It should be a human right to be mentally healthy. It builds into everything: how you lead, the things you build, the things you love, the things you do. Care for yourself and care for those around you. You won't even fully understand the impact you make when you ask someone and really check in on how they're doing. If this blog spoke to you, share it with another strong woman who might need this reminder. Until next time, stay dynamic!
Are you the person who gives endlessly to clients, teams, families, friends, loved ones, and neighbours? The list goes on and on, but in the process, you forget the most essential person: yourself. While I know you understand that prioritizing yourself is important, I'm going to give you permission to actually do it.  In the process of managing all those tasks, situations and people, plus making sure everyone's good, you disappear. It's truly sad, but it's a fact. When I ask people to write down their priorities, the one thing they often don't write down is their own name. I'd like to ask you: When was the last time you put yourself on your own priority list? Beyond Basic Self-Care Maybe you're thinking, "I get my nails done, I get my hair done, I read a book the other day." That's fine. Or maybe you have a business, and you put all your goals on your priority list. That's great too. But is everything you need and want to not only survive but thrive happening in your current schedule? Do you prioritize yourself in your decision-making? The Big Ideas Here are the key concepts I want you to understand to share with you: Prioritizing yourself isn't selfish, it's smart. It helps you be not selfish but self-full. Not full of yourself in an egotistical way, but full of self so you are feeling fulfilled, and energetic because you're honouring yourself. You know the saying about putting your own oxygen mask on first on an airplane? Well, prioritizing yourself is the foundation of sustainable success. You can't lead powerfully, create boldly, or serve effectively if you're exhausted, resentful, and have no time for yourself. The women who rise aren't doing more. They're protecting their energy better. Let me say that again: The women who rise aren't doing more, they're protecting their energy better. My Wake-Up Call People often say, "Diane, you do so much and achieve so much." But the reality is, I've been figuring out how to be more places and do more things without it taking more of my time and energy. There have been times when I put everyone else first. About 10 years ago, I had a client who was hosting an event. I was going to support her and to speak on stage, but I was throwing up all night long. You know those nights when you're hugging the toilet bowl and don't care that you're lying on the bathroom floor? That's when you know you’re really sick. All night, I was thinking about my client and the need to be there, not about my need to rest and get better. In the morning, after throwing up all night (probably food poisoning), I had a few soda crackers, showered, and was one of the first people there and one of the last to leave. I was dead for days afterward. Why did I do it? I have a strong value of commitment, and I'm not a flake. But did I have to be first there, and the last out? Could I have just shown up, done my talk, and left? For sure. That would have prioritized myself. That was a time in my life when I said yes to everything else: new clients, speaking gigs, collaborations, other people's needs and demands. If there was an opportunity, I would do it. But the problem is, it was depletion in disguise. The Turning Point I had to start blocking time for me to think, rest, breathe, go for walks, do counselling, see a doctor, whatever was needed. The truth is, my business didn't die. My life didn't fall apart. I didn't lose friends or relationships. Everything grew because I showed up with more energy, focus, and creativity. A Sobering Stat Women who don't prioritize rest and self-care are 60% more likely to burn out than men in similar roles. Why? It's called mental load or the invisible load: emotional management, household coordination, team harmony. We have to be on top of every little piece. I bet if I asked you right now how many eggs you have, when you need to do laundry next, how much hand soap you have, your kids' best friends' names, you'd know all of these things because this is part of the mental load we carry. We're not only prioritizing activities and people in our lives, we're keeping a running inventory of everything as well. Three Benefits Here are the benefits of prioritizing yourself. Which do you want the most? 1. More Energy Who doesn't want more energy? You get to give more because you replenish yourself and have more to give.  2. Better Decisions Your brain's rested, so you can be clear, focused, and make confident choices when you have space to think. 3. Resilience You bounce back faster when you have stress or setbacks. It doesn't take you down, just slows you down for a moment until you figure out the pivot or next approach. My Sleep Revelation - How I realized I wasn’t prioritizing myself I realized I was feeling more emotional, had less ability to think clearly, couldn't make good decisions, and didn't have much resilience. I thought, "It must be menopause." It wasn't until I looked at my Fitbit reports that I realized I hadn't had consistently more than six and a half hours of sleep (and most weeks averaged five and a half hours). When stats say women need eight to ten hours of sleep, I was basically sabotaging myself. What were my priorities instead? Cleaning up, getting other work done, other people's agendas. It was not pretty, and it was not good for me. Why Do We Struggle to Prioritize Ourselves? 1. Guilt "How can I rest when there's so much to do?" We feel guilty that things aren't getting done or that we're not living up to roles and responsibilities, so we continue to push ourselves.  2. Fear The worry that if you slow down, it looks like you're slacking off, lazy, or your commitment is lacking. We fear looking bad or falling behind if we say no or don't do things to crazy high standards at our own self-sacrifice. 3. Conditioning We've been trained to put everyone else first. Here's a story of how a shower made me mad and taught me permission to care for myself. When my kids were young (a three-year-old and a baby), I was also building my business. My husband came home from work and disappeared upstairs. I heard the shower go on and was so mad. "I wanted to take a shower! Why did he get to go take a shower?" When he came down, I said, "Must be nice. You get to go take a shower." He said, "You want to have a shower? Go take a shower." I replied, "Yes, but the baby needs to be changed, our daughter wants a book read, dinner has to be made, laundry has to be folded..." He said, "No, you don't. Just go shower." It's funny how I always checked in with everyone around me to make sure everyone was okay before I would do something for myself. Have you ever done that? Has a client or team member ever told you, "You're always available"? Was that really a compliment? Are you always available because you're afraid of not serving a client or not living up to some standard? What Happens When You Don't Prioritize Yourself (Score yourself on a scale of 1-10 on these three consequences. 10 being "Yes, this is happening to me" and 1 is “Not at all”.) 1. Chronic Stress That feeling of "I'm always on." You can't turn your brain off at night before bed, or if you awaken, it's hard to get back to sleep. You never really pause or chill. Even on vacation or doing something you like, you're still thinking of your to-do list instead of being present. 2. Resentment Resentment builds. Look at the resentment I had for my husband just taking a shower! What you once loved can feel heavy and hard to do. You might have loved to cook before, and now you don't even want to do that. 3. Creativity Fades You can't be innovative, creative, and passionate when you're exhausted. You can't pour from an empty cup. It's not just about filling your own cup first… fill it so much that it overflows into the saucer, then give from the saucer, not from the cup. If you're a CEO, you need creativity to move your business forward, to be innovative, agile, and able to pivot. If you're in a career, you need creativity to problem-solve and support different situations. Where are you on each of these, and where do you want to be? For example, if chronic stress is at a 6 out of 10, you probably want to be down at a 2 or 3. What would need to happen to get you there? The Real Problem I constantly see brilliant women who are burnt out, not from lack of ability, intelligence, desire, or success, but from a lack of prioritizing themselves and setting boundaries. Then they can't move forward because they're the bottleneck holding themselves back. Your Action Step This coming week, set one non-negotiable hour for yourself. Protect it like your most important meeting or client. You can either set it up in advance (a walk, a nap, coffee at your favorite shop, time to think, create, draw, play, read, cook) or start that time and ask yourself, "What do I really want to do right now?" Doing the dishes, laundry, or finishing a business project are not the answers. What would actually prioritize you? When guilt creeps in, and you think "I could do more, be more, have more, serve more people," remind yourself: My worth isn't in how much I give. It's in how intentionally I live. The Number One Limiting Belief From my program called The Breakthrough (previously called Dynamic Year), where we discuss limiting beliefs, the number one I've found is: "I am not enough." When "I am not enough" is active, we push and do more, and that's when we don't prioritize ourselves. The women who thrive aren't the ones running the hardest. We need to move away from hustle culture. They're the ones who’ve stopped apologizing for taking care of themselves for not attending certain events, not helping people move, saying no to certain clients or projects, setting boundaries. When you love yourself and prioritize yourself, you shouldn't have to apologize. You can be apologetic that you missed something because you wanted to be there, but not for saying yes to yourself. My Own Journey I've had so many opportunities to be on boards, co-chair conferences, attend conventions, and speak at different places. When I look at my life right now and how my kids need me, I've had to say “no” to honor them, but more importantly, to leave space for me. That's been hard, but I don't apologize. I often say, "I really wish I could. That sounds like a great opportunity, but the timing is not right." Your Turn What was your biggest takeaway from this? If it resonated with you, reach out to me at [email protected] and let me know what spoke to you and where I can support you. Share this with another woman who gives her all to life or her business and needs a reminder to prioritize herself. I create these weekly blogs because I want you to have both success and satisfaction on your own terms. I take a stand for the "and", so you have Success AND satisfaction. Until next time, stay dynamic!
This week is extra special because I just celebrated my birthday, and while birthdays are usually about receiving, I want to focus on giving. What matters most to me is that you, my listeners, are supported and encouraged. So listen up as I share my birthday wish for you.  Recently, I turned 46. Instead of receiving birthday wishes, I'd like to flip the table a little bit. I'd like to share a few wishes with you. Think of this episode as my gift to you… words to carry into this season that I hope will give you an amazing year. Here are my five wishes for you. They come from me reflecting on the past year, and each comes from lessons I've learned the hard way: moments when I've had to choose boldness, when I desperately needed rest, when joy reminded me why I do what I do, when freedom became the real marker of success for me, and when faith carried me through uncertainty. (If you prefer to listen to my podcast episode, listen here. If you prefer to watch me on YouTube, go here. Both platforms share the same topic.) 1. Boldness My first wish for you is boldness. My theme this year was to be bold, and I was feeling like I haven't been my full self for probably the first time since before COVID. After my Dad’s passing, losing my FB account, changing how I run my business and all the layers of stress that came with it, I realized I wasn’t showing up as my full, bold self. I felt like I didn't have the emotional capacity or stamina to be bold, and that's really hard for me because one of my values is challenging myself. My wish for you is boldness… to ask for what you want, to take up space, to step into opportunities without hesitation (as long as they align with your big vision). Playing small keeps you safe, but boldness opens doors for growth, visibility, impact, and reaching that big vision and mission in life. Without boldness, you risk staying hidden in places you've outgrown. 2. Rest I wish you the kind of rest that truly restores you, deeply, emotionally, physically. As high-achieving women, we carry everyone's needs: our clients' needs, our team's needs, our family's needs, our friends' needs, our neighbors' needs, the world's needs. We often put ourselves last.  But rest is a strategy, not a weakness. Without rest, burnout is inevitable. I realized by tracking my sleep with my Fitbit that I was only getting an average of five to six hours of sleep, which is not good enough. Women typically need eight to nine hours of sleep (men need less, according to research). When I was able to stay at my childhood home with my mom, I started getting seven and a half to eight and a half hours of sleep, and I started feeling so much better. My wish for you is that you get rest at a deep level, not just with sleep, but in all capacities. 3. Joy I wish you joy that bubbles up in your daily life, not just in the milestones. Not just in those big successful moments when you've published the book, gotten the promotion, or bought the house, but in every single small moment in life. Too often, we reserve our celebrations for big wins, overlooking small achievements that we dismiss as insignificant. But joy along the way fuels resilience and helps you keep going. Without joy, business starts to feel like a grind, your career starts to feel like a grind, and your vision starts to feel like a grind. We're starved for acknowledgment and recognition, so I hope you can recognize your daily life joys, plus the joys in who you are, who you're being, and what you're doing in the world. 4. Freedom I wish you freedom…
 I've recently realized that I have a high-achieving, follow-the-rules, get-things-done, responsible side that's quite different from the fun, quirky, playful, cracking-jokes, slightly edgy side. I want her to be able to show up more, just like I want you to have the freedom to be who you are in all aspects. We can become entangled in our obligations and forget that freedom is why many of us started our businesses in the first place, or why we dreamed of having the career we have. I want freedom for you… freedom of time, choice, and to be who you are. 5. Faith Whatever faith means to you, I wish you faith.
Life will always bring uncertainty and struggle, but faith is what steadies you. When logic says “stop” and fear whispers “you can’t,” faith gives you the strength to keep moving. My wish for you is an extra dose of faith, because without it, fear and doubt take over, but with it, you’ll always find the courage to move forward. My Personal Examples These wishes come from real moments in my past year: Boldness: Like going Zorbing in New Zealand (getting inside big rubber balls with water and being pushed down a hill). I didn't want to do it, but I chose to be bold. Rest: Saying no to things, staying home when I had commitments (and I am a commitment keeper), but really honouring myself and rest. Joy: Hearing successes from clients. I just had a client message me saying she'd only sent half her emails and already had three people interested in her offer. I take joy in that, and I enjoy simple things like sitting on my patio and watching the leaves blow in the wind. Freedom: The ability to spend three weeks at my mom's, house the freedom to pull weeds from her patio to help her out. That's the real marker of success: choosing who to be with, who to spend time with, who you’re going to be, and what you’re going to do. Faith: Saying yes to a mission trip in Kenya despite uncertainty. There were protests, and some people were killed before we went. It was scary and uncertain. But faith carried me through that and so many other things in my life. Your Turn As I blow out my candles this year, these wishes are not just for me. They're for you. I hope you have the boldness, joy, freedom, rest, and faith to not only make your business stronger, but also to make your life feel fuller and more fulfilling. If any of these resonate with you, I'd love to hear about it. Email me at [email protected] or DM on your favourite social platform. Tell me which of these five wishes you needed to receive most right now. If you'd like to give me a gift, the greatest gift would be to share this blog with another amazing woman who deserves these birthday wishes as well. Until next time, stay dynamic!
Can you relate to feeling like your days are just a blur of tasks? Maybe you're chasing deadlines instead of your dreams, and your calendar is a reflection of everyone else's priorities instead of your own. In this blog, I'm sharing how we can stop reacting and reconnect to what we truly want by reclaiming your big vision. September is reset time. As I wrote in a previous blog, we can capitalize on our motivation and decide what we're going to keep, cut, and create in our lives. However, if we don't have a clear vision, or at least some idea of what our future vision could be, it will keep us small and drain our energy. My Wake-Up Call That's where I was. I realized there were just a lot of tasks on my calendar that had moved me away from the one-woman show I was writing. When we're in our big vision, it helps us stay inspired, intentional, and aligned. I felt like I was going in another direction, and it was an energy sucker.  The moment someone asked me how the show was going, I said to myself, "I'm just going to do it," and I put it back in my calendar. Ever since then, I've been re-inspired and motivated and feeling so much better. When you hold that big vision front and center, you stop reacting to what's in your calendar and the things life is throwing at you, and you start creating. Why Big Vision Matters For women entrepreneurs and professionals, vision isn’t just about inspiration—it’s survival. In a world constantly pulling you in a thousand directions, filled with negativity, misplaced values, and relentless marketing telling you to buy more and do more, your vision becomes your anchor. Without it, it’s easy to get swept up in noise, comparison, and distraction. When you lead from a clear vision, you create inspiration, intentionality, alignment, and resonance, the energizing sense of doing what’s truly right for you. The alternative is dissonance: that draining pull, the friction, the loss of energy and spark that comes when you’re off-course. Here’s the truth: 92% of people never reach their goals because they don’t keep their vision visible and active. Only 8% do. The difference? They keep their vision front and center, something they can see, remember, and live by every day. My Deeper Why I had to step back and reconnect, not just with the fact that I’m writing a one-woman show, but with the deeper why behind it. My mission is simple: I want women to stop chasing “enough.” We live in a culture that tells us we always need more: do more, be more, have more, achieve more. But it never ends. Instead of breakthroughs, we end up with breakdowns. We get overwhelmed, burn out, get sick, abandon the things we love, and drown in schedules that never let up. We keep chasing, but satisfaction never arrives. It’s like an itch you can never quite scratch. Through this show, I want to gather women together and talk about this openly. To say out loud that it’s okay to stop. To let go of the expectations we’ve piled on ourselves. Because every time we raise the bar higher and higher, we only move further from the peace and fulfillment we crave. Four Key Benefits of Having Your Big Vision Clear 1. Inspiration When the Work Feels Heavy As part of going through this process. Sometimes the work is heavy and hard. It's not always easy to come up with the script, have difficult conversations, or write hard contracts.  Your vision reminds you it's all worth pushing through. My vision isn't just having the script written, but seeing myself on stage, talking to women afterward, and hearing about the impact months down the road. That vision helps me push through when I don't feel like writing or attending my writing class. 2. Decision Filtering When you have a clear, big vision, it helps you filter decisions. It's so much easier to say “yes” or “no” to things when you're measuring them against your bigger goal. I had to make tough decisions this past year. I was invited to co-chair a conference and be on multiple boards. For me, if I'm going to have time, space, and energy for this big vision, the timing of those amazing opportunities just isn't right now. It helped me know that those things weren't moving me in the right direction. 3. Alignment Your business goals and life goals begin to reflect your personal values as they relate to your big vision. Your success will actually feel fulfilling because it's in alignment. When you do things out of alignment with your personal values, that's where dissonance comes in. Even scrolling social media, while fun at the moment, isn't in alignment with moving toward your big vision (unless there's some strategy involved). 4. Sustainability Every time I have a new idea, I get excited, but once I get into the actual work, attending classes, reading, coming up with ideas, reworking, and editing, it can feel hard. You need your big vision to be so clear that it prevents burnout by focusing your energy on what really matters. I see so many people working toward big goals who lose momentum and energy because they're not living in that big vision. We want to be fueled by the clarity of that big vision, making it sustainable. Why We Get Stuck 1. Constant Demands We have clients, kids, and teams that are often louder than our inner voice, plus things happening in the world and with us personally. So many demands pull us away from the big vision. 2. Busyness Doesn't Equal Your Mission Don't confuse being productive with being purposeful. I was busy and productive, getting things done, but they weren't purposeful toward my big vision. 3. Fear of Failure If dreaming big feels risky, you'll feel safe just doing busy work. Dreams take risk, courage, and bold action. For me, it's not necessarily fear of full failure, but "If I book a theater, will people come?" That feels risky. 4. Loss of Visibility Maybe you didn't write your vision down, so it faded into the background of your to-do list. That's what happened to me. Write it down and tell someone so it doesn't disappear. What Happens When You Ignore Your Big Vision 1. You Lose Sight of Why You Started There was probably a spark when you launched your business or started that new career. That spark gets dimmed under tasks and obligations. 2. Hamster Wheel Living There's motion and busyness, but it doesn't have meaning. You're always busy but not fulfilled, productive but not purposeful. 3. Resentfulness When your days don't reflect your dreams, you begin resenting your own work. I started resenting things not because they were bad, but because I wasn't stepping up to do what I was supposed to be doing.  4. Missed Opportunities Without knowing your big vision, you'll say “yes” to things that pull you off track and won't even see the things that would move you forward. When you're in alignment with your big vision, you start seeing opportunities and new doors open. 5. That Little Voice Won't Shut Up When you're not going toward your big vision, that little voice keeps talking. You'll feel emptiness and chase everything else to fill it. You'll have success and ask, "Is this it?" because the meaning isn't there. I believe we've all been put on earth for a specific reason. When we don't move forward with our big vision, there's a little voice that continues, and there'll be emptiness. What to Do Now
Don't Have a Big Vision Yet? If you're thinking, "Diane, I don't have a big vision," or if you feel off track and aren’t in alignment with your big vision, that’s ok, let's have a conversation. This is one of my specialties: unlocking your greatness, the purpose you're here for, and your next big vision. Reach out to me at [email protected] and let me know you'd like to gain clarity on your vision and ignite that spark. Until next time, stay dynamic!
I know September can feel like a fresh start, but that’s until your calendar gets jammed, and your energy is drained. In this blog, I'll discuss the dangers of sliding into busyness and help you avoid this common trap. The key thing to know: Having a busy calendar does not equal your worth. The Busyness Badge of Honour This can be a big problem for high-achieving women. How many times have you asked someone, "How's it going?" and they respond, "Good, but busy"?  I used to feel proud when people said, "Oh, you're so busy," because it was like a badge of honour. But I realized it doesn't serve me. Being busy doesn't equal being productive, and for women entrepreneurs and female professionals, being busy can be a disguise that disconnects you from true success. Nowadays, I hate when people say to me, "Oh, you're so busy." I don't want to come across as busy. I do have a lot going on, but I've worked really hard to not be so busy, reducing stress and enjoying a better quality of life and relationships. Even though September looks shiny and new, it can often turn into a trap of overloading our calendars and saying yes to everything. Now is when things restart after summer: networking groups, sports, volunteering commitments, all the responsibilities that took a break. Busyness vs. True Success Think about what a successful life means to you. How would you paint your ideal life? What would be your ideal schedule? Where would your relationships be ideally? Look at every area of life. You might feel that having a lot going on makes you important, a mover and shaker in high demand. But is that true success for you? Is being busy with no time for yourself or meaningful relationships really what you want? Is that true satisfaction? Probably not. Research led by Columbia marketing professor Silvia Bellezza shows that people perceive others who are busy as important and impressive. Busyness has literally become a status symbol. I want to shift this for society, maybe for you, maybe for people around you. What I find more impressive is someone who can have a slow start in the morning, take Friday afternoon off, have more vacation time, and still feel successful in their career. That's the goal, isn't it? Are we working to live or living to work? Which is it for you? The Productivity Trap Busyness can be a distraction. Being busy doesn't mean you're productive, and productivity doesn't always equal progress if you're not being productive in the right way. Your worth is not measured by your output. Your worth is measured by your feeling of satisfaction in life. Ask yourself: Am I chasing productivity for validation from others to prove my worth, or am I pursuing progress on things that matter to me? A Wake-Up Call I was recently at a mastermind in Vegas where I meet with other business owners three times a year. I shared how I wanted to commit to doing something specific every single month for the entire year, not just a single event. One person there, who's also a client of mine, said, "Diane, it sounds like you're filling your calendar and making yourself really busy. We have to be very careful with what we put in our calendar." That reminded me: Do I have all the other things I want in my calendar first? Am I committing to something for the whole year that will exhaust me and take time, energy, and resources away from my true goals? Why We Over-Commit 1. Fear of Disappointing Others Someone asks you to be on a board, volunteer, help an organization, join a book club, and you have a fear of disappointing them. You say yes out of obligation, not alignment. 2. Equating Self-Worth with Being in Demand I had a client who was running an event at her daughter's school. She said she didn't have time for business activities, so her business and friendships were suffering. When I asked how long she'd been doing it, I discovered she'd continued running it even after her daughter graduated from the school. She felt good about being in demand and being the one putting on this event, but the self-worth from that didn't pay her bills, move her business forward or strengthen her relationships. She needed to redirect that energy toward her actual goals. 3. Society Glorifies the Hustle We live in a world that praises constant hustle. You tick off task after task, proudly saying, “Look at everything I’m doing!” But pause for a moment, who are you actually becoming in the process? And what in your life makes you say, “Yes, this feels exactly the way I want to live”? Benefits of Slowing Down 1. Clear Priorities and Direction When you slow down, you're not pulled in different directions. You take time to decide what actually deserves to be in your calendar and where you want to put your time, energy, and resources. You get to honour your priorities and be present in the moment. 2. More Meaningful Progress Toward Long-Term Goals Because you’ll have time and space for things that matter most you’ll make great progress. I recently had to reset my calendar because I got off track. I've been talking about writing a one-woman show, but it took a back seat to other things. When someone asked, "How's the show going?" I realized I was losing out on meaningful, aligned goals. Just days ago, I blocked out two hours every weekday on my calendar to focus on my play.  3. Better Emotional Regulation and Stress Levels You'll be stressed when you have too many things, when you're flying from one thing to another with no downtime. When you can regulate emotions and stress levels, you become more productive, healthier, and have better relationships. For us middle-aged women (I'm turning 46 this month), perimenopause and menopause are real. My ability to handle stress has diminished, and my cortisol levels are higher. The more we can slow down, the better for our health, mental and physical. The Three Main Consequences of Not Dealing With This: 1. Burnout - Are you going to be the fourth person who avoids it? If we continue falling into the busyness trap, we'll probably be burnt out by mid-October, definitely before year-end. Christmas will be hard. A Deloitte study shows that 77% of employees have experienced burnout at some point in their careers, with many citing poor work-life balance as the primary cause. That's three out of four people experiencing burnout, not just stress, but actual burnout. 2. Disconnection from your true goals - Just like my health goals, one-woman show, and home renovation goals took a back seat. You will get further away from your goals and maybe even lose touch with the vision or spark that created it all in the first place. Maybe like me it’s time to reconnect with your real goals this month. 3. Strained relationships - You keep telling yourself you’ll slow down, but the demands never end. Dinner plans get skipped, calls go unanswered, and before you know it, you’re always “too busy” for the people who matter most. And it’s not just you: 76% of workers say that stress from work negatively impacts their personal relationships. When you show up stressed from work and react negatively in relationships, you have to spend time and energy repairing them. Being busy stops you from being a nice person, taking care of yourself, growing in other areas, and investing in your marriage or important relationships. The Truth About Growth and Happiness True growth & true happiness do not come from having a packed schedule. It comes from:
Your Action Step Right now, write down three things that are either on your to-do list or in your calendar that don't directly serve your goals. Are you part of a board, networking group, book club, or class that's not serving your goals anymore? Maybe it's not at your level, or maybe it's just not aligned.  (I'm not saying don't volunteer. Volunteering can help you achieve your goal of giving back. I'm helping with my son's school hot lunch program, which doesn't build my business but serves my goal of giving back and building my relationship with my son.) Can you release one of the three you wrote down? I believe you can. When you do it, let me know what it is. Protect Your Calendar Really value your calendar. I've blocked in things that matter: gym/walk/run time, lunchtime, CEO time, massages, and other healthcare providers, so I can work on my business (not just in it), and now my one-woman show time. It's much easier to say no to something when you have strong yeses in your calendar. Then you're actually saying, "If I say yes to this, I have to move or get rid of this from my calendar." Let me know how this has impacted you, and remember, avoid the dangers of sliding into busyness. Your future self will thank you. Until next time, stay dynamic!
Have you ever been part of a group and thought, "Oh, where are my people? This isn't the right fit"? Or maybe you've had a glimpse into what it's like to be around your ideal people. If so, you'll want to read this blog, as I'll discuss how your success depends on the company you keep.  What Sparked This Topic This topic came up because I had three separate conversations this week with three different women who talked about a desire for the right group of women to hang out with and a mismatch of values with the people currently around them. It's especially important at this time of year as we're resetting in the fall, though this is crucial any time of year. As I shared in the previous blog, we're keeping what matters, creating more good things, and cutting what isn't serving us. The next layer of that reset is your environment and the people around you. No reset or plan will have a lasting impact if the people around you aren’t supportive or helping you grow. The right environment is essential for sustainable change. (And I'm not saying your family members need to be business-minded. My husband works a 9-to-5 and has a very different mindset. He's supportive but doesn't brainstorm marketing strategies with me, and that's perfectly fine!) Three Eye-Opening Conversations Let me share three conversations that led to this topic: First: A successful member of my local community said, "Diane, where are the other multiple six-figure business owners? The $500K+ and million+ business owners? I want to hang out with more of them because the conversations are different." Very true. Second: Another mastermind member told me how grateful she is to mastermind with me and others because we "get her." We're not putting her down for her success, and we understand the conversations that need to happen when you're a business owner or high-achieving corporate woman. Many of her friends talk about potty training and meal planning, while she's discussing programs, offerings, and traveling for work. They just don't get it. Third: During lunch with someone, I mentioned my mastermind, and she said she doesn't have one right now because she hasn't found people at her level. Otherwise, she ends up being like the second coach in the group. Everyone's paying the facilitator. She's paying too, but she seems to be running the show because people come to her with questions. All four of us in these conversations are passionate about giving back and teaching others, but we also want to be inspired, led, and challenged by those around us. That's crucial for success. The Truth About High Achievers Here's the truth about high achievers: As a high achiever, you’ll get it. Many women pride themselves on their independence, but success doesn't happen in isolation. We can't be silos or do it all ourselves. That's why I have two VAs on my team, multiple masterminds I attend, coaches I work with, and business advisors. Take a moment for reflection with this tough question: Who's speaking into your life? Are they fueling you or draining you? Moving you up or down? Contributing to your success or instrumental in any failures? The Energy of Like-Minded People When you're around like-minded people, there's energy that forms because there's resonance in conversations. When you're around other ambitious, value-aligned women who normalize big goals, that's powerful. I remember talking about goals and hearing responses like, "Oh, don't work too hard," or "That sounds crazy. How are you going to do that?" Their insecurities came forward with questions about time, money, and feasibility. We don't want other people's insecurities stepping into what we're doing.  When you start having success like winning awards, closing clients, launching programs, writing books, others can think you're "too much." But here's the thing: In the wrong room, you're too much. In the right room, you're actually on track. Like-Minded Doesn't Mean Identical When I say "like-minded," I don't mean identical. It's not a room full of the same kind of person like all coaches or real estate agents. It means you're like-minded in your:
The Wrong Crowd vs. The Right Crowd In the wrong crowd, you can feel misunderstood or diminished. Let me share some examples: Business Example I was at a mastermind I thought was high-level. Someone was asking for suggestions, and when another person suggested a "lead magnet," they asked, "What's a lead magnet?" I hadn't even suggested that because I assumed someone in business for 20-30 years would have multiple lead magnets already. Contrast that with being in a room where people are making multiple seven figures. I needed to hear that. Their sharing stretched, inspired, and challenged me. I felt like a small fish in a big pond. They were doing incredible things, which inspired me to do great things too. When you're in a room where conversations are years behind where you are, it can give you a big ego and make you feel like you don't need to challenge yourself anymore. You become the big fish in a small pond, which can make you apathetic and lazy. Soccer Example I joined an over-30s soccer league after moving provinces and got placed on a team that wasn't very skilled. Though I'd played competitive soccer my whole life, I was adapting my style to fit their limitations. A player coach from another team approached me and said, "Don't be offended, but I think you're becoming a worse player." She explained that instead of playing proper midfield and carrying the ball like a good player, I was just "hoofing it", doing long kicks to get rid of the ball because I couldn't execute proper plays with my teammates. She was right. I wasn't surrounded by the right players to play good soccer. When I moved to the better team, I could actually play well again, but I had to unlearn the bad habits I'd developed. The key insight: I was still a good player on the weaker team, but I wasn't playing good soccer. The Power of the Right Environment When you're in the right mastermind, retreat, event, or circle of peers, whether in soccer, music, church, arts, or anything else, you feel expanded and inspired. The cool thing is, when you see others doing amazing things, you think, "I'm going to do that too," and you become braver.  I just heard about someone who went from creating a $100,000 coaching program to a $250,000 one. Even if that just pushes me to create a $50K program, it makes me braver, inspires me, and expands what I think is possible. Shrinking vs. Rising This emotional difference of shrinking vs. rising matters so much, especially in September when you're deciding what to keep, cut, and create in your schedule. Shrinking Without like-minded women around you, you can shrink back into old patterns. If you join a group that makes it okay to not go for the sale or not work out (or whatever your goals are), you won't achieve them. You might also shrink yourself by thinking, "I can't tell them I got another award or published another book because they'll feel bad about themselves or make nasty comments." This is the tall poppy syndrome, when you start poking your head up, people cut you down. Also, like crabs in a bucket pulling each other back. If you're in dissonance with people trying to shrink you, you'll have a lack of energy that leads directly to burnout. You need to share and celebrate your accomplishments to grab motivation and use it as momentum moving forward. Rising With the right people around you, they'll:
If you're in resonance with people helping you rise, you'll have more energy that leads directly to reaching your goals. You Don't Need a Massive Network You don't need tons of people. How about five? Five aligned voices, five aligned people in a mastermind or five in a group can shift everything for you. Jim Rohn's quote hit me like a slap in the face: "You're the average of the five people you spend the most time with." I discuss this in my book and program Dynamic You™, I talk about creating your board in the Connection Pillar (Chapter 4, page 46). Your Action Steps Here's what to do now:
Here's the tough love: That's the mirror of your future. Those five are who you're going to become. Do you want to become those people? Are you inspired and motivated by them? Your People = Your Success or Downfall Based on these three conversations and what I've covered today, your people will be your success or your downfall. That's why I'm developing a high-level, like-minded group of women who will inspire and help you be bolder, better, and reach your goals easier. If you're interested in being part of that, please email me at [email protected]. I'm putting together a waitlist, so stay tuned for some exciting developments. Remember, this is a great conversation starter with someone you'd like to be part of your five. You could share this blog as a way to invite them into your five, and maybe you can be part of theirs too. Until next time, stay dynamic!
(Take the Quiz and See where you stand!)
Are You Wearing All the Hats in Your Business?
CEO. Admin. Tech support. Social media manager. Content creator. Scheduler.
As a business owner, it’s easy to slip into the mindset of “I’ll just do it myself.” Maybe that worked in the early days when your business was smaller. But now, your to-do list has multiplied, the stakes are higher, and your time has never been more valuable.
If you’re feeling overwhelmed, constantly busy, and pulled in too many directions, it might be time to get help. But how do you know if you’re truly ready to hire a Virtual Assistant?
That’s exactly what this quiz is designed to help you figure out.
Why You’re Hesitating
I get it. Hiring someone can feel like a big leap.
You may have thought things like:
These thoughts are common, and they can hold you back from the growth and freedom you’re craving. But here’s the truth: a VA isn’t an expense, it’s an investment. The right VA doesn’t just take tasks off your plate. They give you back the time and energy to focus on the work that actually moves your business forward.
And what if you’re closer to being ready than you think?
Why the Quiz Matters
There are clear signs that show when it’s time to stop doing it all yourself. Some are obvious, while others might surprise you. This quiz reveals all 10 and shows exactly where you stand today.
Imagine what it would feel like to finally get your evenings back, take a real vacation, or work only on the parts of your business that energize you. The truth is, there are specific indicators that show when you’re ready to make that shift. This quiz walks you through each one and helps you see if now is your moment.
If you’re feeling stretched thin, working late, and constantly playing catch-up, you’re not alone. The good news is that there are proven signs that let you know when it’s time to bring in help. Take the quiz to discover all 10 and see if you’re ready to lighten the load.
Each one of these is a signal that you’re running up against the limits of what you can achieve solo. Delegation isn’t about weakness or lack of ability. It’s about stepping into your role as a leader and focusing on the things that only you can do... the vision, the strategy, the relationships, the creativity.
Sound familiar?
Take the Quiz and Find Out
The “10 Signs You’re Ready for a VA” Quiz is a quick and powerful tool to help you get clarity.
And the best part? No matter where you land, you’ll know exactly what your next step is.
Ready to Find Out Where You Stand?
You don’t have to keep spinning your wheels, missing opportunities, or drowning in busywork.
Take the quiz now and see if it’s finally time to get the support you deserve.
Final Thought
Hiring a VA isn’t just about saving time. It’s about reclaiming your freedom and stepping into your highest potential as a business owner. When you let go of the tasks that drain you and focus on the ones that light you up, you’ll not only grow your business, you’ll enjoy it again.
If you’re serious about scaling, reducing stress, and creating space for what matters most, support is not a luxury. It’s a strategy. Start with the quiz. You might be more ready than you think. Today, we're talking about your fall freedom plan. You may have thought you just had freedom in the summer, wanting to stay in July and August forever. But we're coming into fall, September, a fresh start. It's time to reclaim that leader within you.  If you’re lucky you got to be a bit of a follower over the summer with others making the plans. I'm hoping you were able to balance both productivity and fun. (If you grabbed the Summer Productivity Playbook, it would have helped you to be balanced, and it’s good for any time of year. If you haven’t yet, grab your access to the mini course here.) Summer Shows Us Where We've Been Surviving Summer often shows us where we've been surviving. We finally get a break. A lot of things finish up. Maybe sports are slowing down or finishing, volunteering commitments wind down, networking groups take a hiatus. There's often a lot more breathing room when you don't have everything happening at once. First, celebrate that you made it through summer! Whether it was hard with kids at home, bouncing from place to place, or maybe you didn't really get a summer break and worked through the whole thing. Now you get a chance to lead on purpose. The Back-to-School Energy Yes, we have the back-to-school chaos that happens. Even if you're not part of it because you're not going back to school or don't have kids, there's still that energy in the air. All the back-to-school sales, the streets getting busier when school starts. It's a time when everybody talks about fresh starts and renewed ambition. I want you to tap into that energy, but pay attention to any lingering burnout. If you didn't get a chance to have a proper summer break, you might still have some burnout lingering, or maybe you feel like you need a vacation from your vacation. That's totally possible, too. The Fresh Start Myth September can feel like a fresh start or give you pressure of a fresh start, but there's a myth here. Just because it's a new season doesn't mean you have to start fresh, unless you want that and you're going to make space for it to happen. Too many leaders just jump into fall saying, "Let's go! Let's go!" without resetting. I did another blog about having a look at what you're keeping, what you're cutting, and what you're creating, I encourage you to check that out. But as a leader, you need to jump into fall only after resetting. Are you planning from the intention of "This is actually what I want to happen in the fall" or are you planning from burnout? Where are you right now? Are you really ready to plan with intention, or do you not have the bandwidth to make that happen? It's okay to wait to fully jump in and make sure you get the rest you need so you can have that fresh start and tap into the excitement of the new season. Your Three-Area Fall Freedom Plan  There's inner work that can happen as part of your fall freedom plan. Let's look at three key areas: 1. Time What does freedom look like in your calendar? For me, I don't like to book meetings, coaching clients, or sessions until 10 AM. That's because the chaos of my kids going to school ends just before nine, and that gives me time to ease into my day, do my devotion, have a walk in the forest, or go to Pilates twice a week in the morning. What would ideal freedom look like for you? Not just "maybe I could do this" realistic thinking, but really, what's the ideal? Then work backwards from there. Ask yourself: Is your schedule serving you, or are you serving it? Do you feel like you're running from one thing to another or flipping from meeting to meeting without any space for yourself? 2. Team Are you supported in a way that actually lifts you up? Does your support help you reach your goals and move the needle toward time freedom, work freedom, and financial freedom? Or is it just keeping your head above water, just enough support, but not getting the results you need? (If that’s the case, reach out to me and let’s talk about how my program Virtual Assistant Made Easy can help you.) If you have better people on your team, it's going to give you freedom to work on high-impact, high-quality, high-income-producing tasks. That's what I want for you in Q4. 3. Energy Where do you leak energy? Look at your upcoming calendar or think back to April and May (since June might have slowed down). Are you leaking energy with a person you don't want to work with, a client, a project, volunteering commitment? It might even be scrolling social media. On the flip side, what's trying to come back in? Remember, a lot of things take a break for summer, like networking groups, volunteering commitments, and sports. What's trying to come back in that you need to create space for, and which things do you just need to let go of? Focus on Being, Not Just Doing By examining your time, team, and energy, you'll have a better idea of how to create more freedom. This is a time for personal reflection, not just diving into list-checking mode. It's about tuning into your own alignment this fall with where your resonance is, rather than dissonance. It's less about the logistics of what you're doing and more about who you're being and how it feels. I want you to always feel like you can just breathe, that there's space for you. There's a difference between filling your calendar with busy work and fueling your mission. You have a mission. You have an impact you want to make in the world. Avoid the Burnout Warning Light We don't want the burnout warning light coming on before you've even really started. You want to be able to end the year strong. If you're already burnt out before fall begins, your system isn't broken. It's just begging for a rest. Have a rest before you say yes to bringing everything back in. You're also out of practice. Over the summer, you've had a slower pace, and now you can't just go from zero to 60. You don't want to white-knuckle your way through, thinking "I'll just get through this until Thanksgiving," and then white-knuckle it again until Christmas. That's not how we want to finish the year. Create Something Sustainable and Soul-Led Instead, let's make something that feels stronger, more sustainable, and more soul-led. When you're in resonance and alignment with your soul, you're going to have more energy. That's a given. It might mean passing things off so you can stay in that great place and have more time freedom, work freedom, and financial freedom.  What Resonates with You? What from today's message most resonates with you? Is it looking at your time, team, and energy to figure out where your fall freedom plan will come from? Is it focusing on being rather than just doing? Maybe you are realizing you actually need a rest before starting fall. Just because society is pushing that September means "hit the ground running" it doesn't mean you have to follow that timeline. You get to lead your own life. You get to decide and then lead as that confident, rested, soul-led leader come fall. I'm curious what has resonated with you. Feel free to email me at [email protected] or send me a message on your favorite social platform. Remember, we have Virtual Assistant Made Easy where we can match you with one of our vetted, experienced VAs so they can take a load off and give you the freedom you deserve. Until next time, stay dynamic!
Do you know that there's a moment every August where you either reclaim your role as a leader or get swallowed by your own to-do list? I've been seeing women straddling these two energies: control and capacity. Which are you going to choose?  Two Competing Energies: Control vs. Capacity Control means doing everything, covering everything, and being on top of everything, but it eventually gets overwhelming because there's just too much. In control, you still try to do it all. You're still on that treadmill, and you're still going, and you want to make everything happen. Capacity is where you know, "I've done everything I can, and I just don't have enough hours or energy in the day." With capacity, you're starting to set some boundaries and see what you can achieve within your time frame. In both, there's the invitation. Release control over things so you gain capacity. I hear a lot of people say, "I just don't have the time for that. I don't have the energy for that. There aren’t enough hours in the day." September is for Leading, Not Cleaning Up As we enter September, it's not the time to be cleaning up. August is. September is the time to lead boldly. Think of it like Olympic track athletes getting ready for the 100-meter race. You want to be in the blocks, ready to go as soon as September hits (or at least after you've had your final long weekend in Canada). The Real Problem with Waiting There's a real problem with waiting to outsource or pass tasks off. Most people don't realize the weight they carry until it breaks something or someone. When you are overwhelmed with all the different tasks, it can break your focus, creativity, and joy. It can break your spirit for what you're doing. Sadly, sometimes we reach a point where we can no longer work. I've seen this happen to several people close to me who've developed physical ailments due to overworking. That pressure of "I'll just do it myself, it's just easier" leads to:
These can also lead to breaking you financially. The Emotional Load of Undelegated Tasks It’s a good time to reflect on how this mindset is creeping into your life, even when you know better. I've been working with two Virtual Assistants for over four years, I have to check myself constantly and ask: "Why am I doing this? Why am I not passing this off?" There's an emotional load that comes with undelegated tasks. When you have a list of unfinished tasks, it's like they're telling you, "Hey, you're behind. You're not good enough. Can you really do this?" You can feel guilt for not keeping up, thinking "I didn't get this thing done on time," or the guilt of "I know that's still sitting there unfinished." It might not be just stuff in your business; it might be things in your personal life because professionally, you're eating into your personal time. If you feel that guilt and then hear the whispering of "you're behind, you'll never catch up," paired with the shame of not asking for help, this is a leadership drain of your ability to move your business forward. It's not just time-consuming, but it's identity-eroding. It's eroding your confidence and your leadership ability, and once gone we can't always get them back in the same way, or the same strength they were before. A Real Example: Freedom by the Pool There was a client of mine working with one of my VAs from Virtual Assistant Made Easy, and we were actually on a trip together, and she decided that she would just sit by the pool and not bring her computer or do any work. This was the first time that she had done this because her virtual assistant was able to take things on. She chose to delegate because there was a lot of stuff going on, and she didn't want that chaos to hit when she was trying to have a vacation, which she wasn’t able to take very often until she had this virtual assistant. Since I’ve had support for a while, I've been so far removed from the feeling like you can't get away. It was really good for me to see that emotional relief that she had, that renewed sense of clarity on things, the confidence to unplug. It makes a big difference when you can say, "Yeah, I'm not weighed down by my business. I can actually step away and have some time freedom." Yes, there have been a lot of tactical gains, a lot of business results, from increasing her income to the highest she's ever had, bringing on more clients than before, and many awards she's gained. But the key thing here was just the pride that she had of being like, "Wow, this is possible. I can actually take time for myself." Can You Take Time Off? Are you able to feel that peace that comes with knowing that you don't have to do it all yourself? I want to reframe something for you: Delegation isn't just a trust exercise of "Can I hand this off, or not?" Delegation isn't just a to-do list. It's not necessarily about the action of handing off tasks. It's about what you get to do when your hands and mind are free.  I often joke with my new clients in Virtual Assistant Made Easy: "You're going to get these hours back, but that doesn't mean you now go and scroll Facebook." Actually use these hours in a way that's going to move you towards your goals, both personally and professionally, because what you get to do when your hands and mind are free is going to create that time freedom, work freedom, and financial freedom for you, for your business, for your loved ones, for your life. Your Choice Point You can ask yourself: What's it costing me holding on to things that don't need to be mine anymore? Am I reaching a point of overwhelm, or am I choosing to outsource? If you're interested in the outsourcing route, please reach out to me. I have a team of vetted virtual assistants, all from the Philippines, with great English, lots of experience, and they can do everything from social media, content creation, video/audio editing, tech support, graphic design, content repurposing, research, inbox and calendar management, and the list goes on and on. As a coach, trainer, speaker, podcaster, and author, my VAs handle all the behind-the-scenes work, including creating and distributing the content I'm producing like this blog. You're probably a great leader. And I know that with a few more free hours and a little more peace, you’ll be at the right capacity, which will help you lead even better. Your Action Item Here's my invitation to you:
This is your chance to choose to lead your life and your business how you wish, not just tick off the boxes on your to-do list. Reach out to me and get a VA through Virtual Assistant Made Easy, and we'll make it easy for you to gain your time freedom, work freedom, and financial freedom. If you haven't yet, share with a friend and check out all the other summer blogs I'm doing which are short, to the point, one action item, and continue on this journey with me as we go into the fall, where I'm going to be talking more about how to have a strong Q4, how to be confident, and a ton of other topics. If there's something that you'd like to specifically hear about or have me cover, or you want to reach out to me about having your own VA, you can reach out to me: [email protected]. Until next time, stay dynamic!
|
Archives
January 2026
Categories
All
|
RSS Feed